My Best Friends Brother

Chapter 213

Fuck them.

"Not fucking likely. We aren't far away now so I'll see you in like twenty minutes, get Luke a beer and not one of those fake shits that you drink, I'll have a coke." I can hear the party is picking up already, I didn't realise how late we were running after checking out apartments this afternoon until we got in the car, plus Luke takes about a month to do his fucking hair.

"Okay man, when you get here I need to tell you something though... I think nearly everybody is here now anyway so don't rush. Brie said we're just waiting on Jo-" He cuts himself off but it's a bit fucking late.

Josh.

Damn it Milo, breathe. You can't stop fucking breathing every time you think about him, it's not fucking natural.

Why does Jayce sound so concerned when he said he has to tell me something? Is it about him... he knows I'm coming right?

Breathe Milo.

Luke makes a loud crackling noise with his throat like we're going through a tunnel before ending the call on the cars display and immediately switching back to the music like nothing happened. It's shit like this which is why I keep his miserable ass around.

He doesn't say another word until we reach the middle of town, stopping at the lights as he continues to fucking fidget in his seat and wrestle with his suit.

"Will you stop. You look fucking fine, chill the fuck out." He's worse than having a fucking kid. Luke gives me a glare that a few years ago would have made me shut my mouth, but after living with him for the last three years, his beady little eyes don't work on me anymore.

"I fucking hate wearing suits. You know I hate wearing suits. I don't understand why you need me to come, couldn't you have asked someone else? Ashley owes you for the last six months, if not here then you could have asked..."

"Eli?" This time when he looks at me I do shut my fucking mouth.

Oh that's right, we don't talk about Eli at the moment. Ever since I saw the... Never mind, that's their story to tell.

"So, are you nervous about seeing... everyone?"

Everyone. No.

Someone. Yes.

Fuck, I'm actually going to see him. Four years and I'm finally going to fucking see him in something more than my dreams. But what the fuck am I supposed to say to him when I see him?

How the fuck are we even going to do this? The last time I saw him in person I was kissing him goodbye, honestly believing that I might go my entire life without coming face to face with him again.

Now, it's four years later, and everything has fucking changed.

For him anyway.

For me... Nothing has changed.

Four years, and I don't feel different at all.

I tried, I really did. I know I told him to move on and I should too... I just couldn't. I've never been the type of person to date a lot anyway, but from my very first college party I knew that my experience there wasn't going to be the same as everybody else's. I just wasn't interested, I wasn't interested in any of it.

That first year there was fucking hell. My whole life collapsed around me and a new one started in the matter of twenty-four hours. I had no one, Eli was still in the hospital and it's not like I could take May with me. I could talk to them all on the phone and Skype but as soon as the screen went dark, I was alone again.

There were a lot of good guys on the team, they took care of me and helped me through my classes but everything else was just on my shoulders. Finding Ashley helped, she loved music and helped me transition my major, it just wasn't enough.