Personal Body Guard - (Shawn Mendes)

27

"When I tell you every feeling I felt
Was honest and sincere
And that you were different
And when we kissed I felt like that kid in love, yeah"

-

*Emily's Point Of View*

I was awaken by the feeling of fingers caressing my head and brushing through my hair. I was in a blissful state and never wanted to wake up.

My eyes fluttered open to see the sun peeking out from behind the curtains. Except it wasn't my curtains. It was Shawn's.

Memories of last night flooded my brain and a smile grew along my lips.

"Morning baby" Shawn said, his morning voice husky and undeniably attractive. His pet name making my heart flutter.

"Good morning" I said softly.

We sat there in silence, not an uncomfortable one but a more peaceful one. Where I could just appreciate the sound of his heart beat against my ear and the feeling of his arms wrapped around me.

My thoughts drifted to yesterday and our argument. If Shawn got so mad at me wanting to know about his parents, why did he open up to me last night?

"Hey Shawn?" I whispered.

"Hm?" He hummed lifting his head, looking down at me curiously.

"Why did you get so mad the first time I asked about your parents?" I asked softly not wanting him to get angry like the first time I asked.

He sighed deeply, his chest sinking with it.

"I-it's complicated" he stuttered out.

"Hey... You don't have to tell me if you don't want to" I said placing a hand on his chest.

"It's not that I don't want too. I- I just haven't told anyone this before really" she whispered staring off in a daze.

I nodded signaling from him to continue as I stared at him.

"I got mad because it's a sensitive topic for me... I haven't spoken to my parents in three years" he said making me take in a breath. How can you not speak to your parents for three years? My parents can be seriously annoying but I couldn't ever imagine not speaking to them for a week let alone 3 years.

"Why?" I asked curiously.

He took in a shaky breath making my hand rise from his chest to his cheek to softly caress it.

"Hey you don't need to tell me... it's okay" I said softly as I saw his eyes become glossy. I had never seen Shawn upset or cry. And I didn't want to start today.

"No. I trust you. And I want to tell you..." he said taking another deep breath.

"Just don't hate me" he breathed out.

Hate him? Why on earth would I hate him?

I nodded not breaking eye contact.

"So three years ago... I told my parents that I was going to be getting another job... I-I didn't tell them what though" he started, his hand involuntarily running up and down my arm.

"It was supposed to just be a security guard for this event at this club that was in my city" he continued making me nod for him to continue.

"And I got there and it was a massive drug deal. Brian and I met that night... he was helping me secure the place" he said his eyes drifting off to stare at the blanket. Memories of the familiar red head that was in the coffee shop when we met came back.

"And it was almost midnight and no one had really tried to get in besides a few random party goers who were familiar with the club".

"Then this car pulled up, I thought it was just another party goer or someone attending the drug deal. But four men came out... w-with hand pistols in there waist bands and some machine gun tied around them" he spoke taking in another deep breath.

I sat up beside him, beginning to run my fingertips up and down his arm to soothe him.

"A-and I never really saw a gun before... I was only freshly twenty then. They came up and basically threatened to shoot me unless I let them in" He said making me gasp and cover my mouth in shook.

"I needed this job. I was getting paid good money so I- I thought maybe I'd just tell them they couldn't and they'd leave".

"But obviously they didn't. He held a gun to my head..." he said sternly as his face tightened in anger at the memory.

"Luckily Brian has been doing this for years and had taken three of them down. But there was one guy left... and he shot me... right here" he said pointing to his other arm. I glanced at it to see a scar right on the corner of his shoulder. I gasped not wanting the image of Shawn getting shot in the head.

"He got away and I was fucked. I had to go to hospital and get it taken out. It was the most painful thing I've ever experienced. The whole situation was fucked" he hissed out.

"My parents began to get worried about me. I was out late at nights to the early mornings either drinking until I passed out, doing drugs or guarding drug deals" he said making me take in a breath at the new information of him doing drugs.

"We got into this massive fight one night. We talked to each other like we hated each other... And I hit her. I h-hit my o-own m-mum" he stuttered out a tear slipping down his cheek which I quickly wiped away.

"I packed my shit and left, I moved to Washington and began guarding more and more events, working myself over load until I was known as the most 'prestige' guard in North America" he admitted rolling his eyes at the word prestige.

"That was when your dad called me that you got into UCLA... and you were moving to Los Angeles" he finished looking down at the blanket to avoid all eye contact with me.

This was a lot of information to take in. Too much for my brain to handle. I sat there for a few minutes my brain gathering it all to make sense.

"Emily? I get if you hate me-" , "I don't hate you... I-I never could..." I stuttered out.

"Do you know where you parents are now?" I asked looking up at him to see him already staring back at me.

He sighed, "Yea I have mates from Toronto who tell me how there going..." he said sadly.

He took in a shaky breath before looking at me with glossy eyes.

"I really fucking miss them Em" he said making me pull him into my arms as he began to sob.

His head nuzzled into my neck as I felt my shirt dampen from his tears.

"It's okay... let it out" I whispered rubbing his back comfortingly.

-

A/N: ahh the thought of Shawn crying makes me depressed as fuck. Alsooo thoughts on the behind the scenes part 1 and 2 for señorita??? I personally think, everyone is commenting that he laughs and looks so much happier with her but when I was watching part 2 behind the scenes it looked like he was being more goofy and laughing more when it was his single motorcycle scenes. But idk ahh