Mystic Falls has always been the same. Nothing happens here. Everyone knows each others business if you like it or not. It wasn't until I discovered my towns dark history that I realized I have been living a lie. One way or another I'm going to keep...
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Since Sheila's death, I've distanced myself from Elena, Stefan and above all Damon. Getting dragged down into their supernatural mess. I know Elena is worried about me and how I'm handling everything, but if I'm being honest I want to push it all behind me and forget it ever happen. But how can someone push something like this? I feel like I'm going to break at any second and I shouldn't feel like this. Bonnie is the one who lost her grandmother. Not me. I'm just the person who caused it.
__________________________________ Matt could tell I was upset but he wouldn't press on what exactly I was upset about. I said it was due to Bonnie's grandmother dying and that it brought up losing my parents all over again. He understood and was trying to do everything to cheer me up. Bring me my favorite muffin from the Grill after his shifts, but every nice thing he did it made feel worse about myself. Bonnie has been avoiding Elena and my phone calls and texts. I know that what happened was traumatizing but I fear that she hates me. Sadly, I wouldn't blame her for doing so. I hate myself for what happened.
Matt is the best thing for me. He makes me laugh and most of all he reminds me there's still good in this world. I wish though he wanted to distract me a little more than watching a re-run of one of our favorite shows. Sure, I love it, but I need something a little more.
"Matt, we've been watching this for hours, don't you want to do something else?" I ask him. He has his arm draped over my shoulder pulling me close to him.
"I don't know Sof, this a really good show." He teases and I know how to tease right back. I throw his arm off. "Hey! What..." I don't give him a second to think as I straddle him and attack his lips. Matt and I have kissed a bunch but we haven't gotten to sex and I'm thankful for it. It felt like my whole relationship with Tyler was sex and his mother wanting us to promise to marry each other. Nothing felt real. But with Matt I know I love him and I know he loves me. Matt likes this change in activity and helps pull my shirt off. He kisses up and down my neck as I feel my body grinding on his. I let out a moan when he reaches my sensitive spot and I can't take it anymore. I reach down and tug at the bottom of his shirt and he gets the message and takes it off. He lays me down and crawls on top while I hooked my legs around his hip pulling him close. I work my way to unbuttoning his pants.
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"Oh, god." Matt's head jerks up and I feel instantly mortified. "Not on my couch." Shit his mom just walked in on us about to have sex. If I didn't feel shitty before I certainly do now.
"Mom. Hey." I move a pillow in front of Matt erection and I hide my face from embarrassment. This never happened when Elena and Matt were tougher and I surely never had Mrs. Lockwood walk in on Ty and me. This is a first and I hope the last.
__________________________________ I hope escaping to hide underneath my pillow would be enough but no I had to run into my family with my face still beet red. Elena thought it was a great idea to write in her diary on the front porch basically ambushing me from sneaking into the house undetected and of course, Jenna had to walk up at the same time.
