LUCY
The bus station is a little disconcerting place, all those buses, the colors, all the people and the big noise.
"I'll be fine," said Gemma through the phone line. "I'll go to my mother's house, I'll stay there for a few weeks, I think."
"Please take care."
"Your ankle is better?"
"Yes but I have a bruise," I sighed.
" I know I've said many times but thanks, really. Lucy, you were very brave and it was very risky but you did it for Charlie and I appreciate. Seriously. "
"I did it for both," I said with a slight smile.
"Are you nervous?"
"About what?"
"About your little trip, you'll be with my brother alone. Don't let him convince you unless you want to. "
I gulped and stammered a few unintelligible words.
"I can see you're nervous," Gemma laughed and I'm glad to hear her laugh.
"Hm, talking about anything else you could come with us. It's perfect for you. "
"No, she can't!" Harry stated and I rolled my eyes. "Bye, Gemma!”
"Lucinda, I'd never go, I don't want to ruin the fun. Enjoy it and forget your troubles, it'll be good to you. "
"Thanks, I will."
"Oh, and if you have any questions about sex you can call me, but don't call me when you guys are in the middle of the—"
"Okay, thanks. I have to go, okay? "I spoke quickly. Gemma laughed again at my reaction and then said goodbye.
I hung up the call and kept the phone in my pocket. I looked at my hands and I still feel his blood on my skin. I shook my head and deleted the morbid thought.
"Don't go!" Louis yelled for the tenth time. "What am I going to do without the two?" He sighed.
I can't believe the boys are here, it's pretty early.
Niall gave me a hug. His gesture seems a bit odd since we don't talk much. He kissed my cheek and my eyes widened. I felt Harry's hand grab mine a second later. I looked at him but he was on the phone.
"Lucy, put on your flower crown!" Louis ordered.
I didn't want to use it and I didn't understand the point of this. I put on my crown and smiled forcibly.
"You too, Liam!" Louis growled.
Payne placed the flower crown on his head and rolled his eyes. Just like me he found this nonsense, but when it comes to Louis nothing makes sense. We all were wearing those flower crowns, Harry wore his with no problem and I figured he did it to avoid a scolding from Louis.
I heard Harry calling my name. It was time to leave. We said goodbye to the boys and Louis pretended to cry.
We left our backpacks, we show our tickets and got on the bus. I crossed my legs and rubbed my hands on my jeans. They were sweating, it's embarrassing. I looked at Harry and he was watching me, I see a small smile on his lips. His face is extremely close to mine, is very intimidating and he's looking so good today. I want to recoil but didn't move.
I stared at my legs but from the corner of my eye I noticed he was watching me. I rubbed my face with one hand and I dropped my glasses due to the sudden move. Harry picked it up and handed them to me. I smiled and kept my mouth shut. I haven't said a word since we got into the bus, I'm mute like the old times.
"You haven't said a word, are you okay?" He asked when the bus left the bus station.
"Just nervous."
"Why? Don't be, this is supposed to be a very, very short vacation."
"And what are we going to do? I guess in the day we will go out and we will be up all night like a sleepover. "
His smile grew and I raised my eyebrows.
“Yes, sort of. But I have some particular ideas if we are going to stay up all night. "
I bit my lower lip very strong. I guess I know what he means, I said yes. Part of me is insecure but I have been insecure all my life so it's nothing new. Another part of me wants more, it's weird because I suddenly felt that what we have was not enough, I felt I had to discover new things and we could move to another level. I like when he kisses me but I can feel the constraint between the two and I want to know how it feels not to have restrictions, not to have limits and just let ourselves be guided by our instincts and our love. I was not ready but Mandy said if I always thought that way I will never be ready.
I stopped thinking and looked through the window. It's early, should be like eight o'clock. We decided to leave early to enjoy the day. I curled up next to Harry and fell asleep.
I woke up and I stayed on Harry's shoulder for a couple of seconds. His chest moves slowly and his hands are static. I settled into my seat and yawned. I rubbed my face with my hands and then looked out the window. There is something important I have to ask Harry but I don't know how, I don't think he will get mad because it's a perfectly normal question. I hope not to offend him.
I was feeling tired but I didn't want to sleep. It's uncomfortable and my back is aching in some areas. I just closed my eyes and let my mind go blank.
"Lucy?"
I opened my eyes when I hear the boy next to me.
"Did you sleep well?"
"No, this sucks," Harry yawned. "But once we get there we could take a nap."
"Yes, my back hurts. We could sleep for an hour and then go out. "
He nodded and checked his phone. I don't think he's going to sleep again so I guess this would be a good time to ask.
"Harry, I have a question for you."
He left his phone on his lap and looked me.
"Don't be mad, it's...it's important to me."
He nodded and waited.
"I'm not saying you have it but I-I was wondering if you've ever done a test of—"
"STDs?" He completed the rest of the sentence. My heart stopped, his face is serious.
"Ah, yes, but I-I don't think you have a disease but I was just curious, I don't want you to feel offended, it's not my intention—"
"Lucy, calm down," he grabbed my hands. "Yes, I did it, I always do. It's normal. The last time I did it was like three months ago. For the record, I didn't have sex with Emily when she returned. Wait, you remember about Viagra? "
I laughed but nodded.
"You really surprised me that day. You always surprise me," he shrugged. "Anyway I didn't want Emily and I didn't even put effort to do something about it. I just didn't care about that topic anymore. But you have to know that I haven't had sex in a very, very long time. "
He seemed very calm, I think I was too scared to ask.
"I didn't want to make things uncomfortable, don’t get me wrong, I-I just—"
"Lucy, it's okay, it's super normal. You already have the answer and now we can forget about it," he sent me a cute smile. I thought he would be mad at me, I know my question is inappropriate and can be misunderstood.
I sighed and my shoulders felt lighter. Harry hugged me and I kissed his chin and jaw.
For a moment I felt insecure, I felt a bad tension between us but suddenly Harry started talking about movies and during the rest of the trip we talked about many things. We arrived at our destination 30 minutes later and it felt good to stretch our arms and legs.
We got out and grabbed our backpacks. I looked around, it's a small town. I didn't think I would escape from my parents for a few days and less than I would do it with a boy. We were out of the reality and far from everyone we knew and away from trouble. I was feeling relieved and...free, it's a fake freedom because I have to go back but for the moment I'm going to enjoy it.
The day is not so hot, the weather is nice. Harry told me that the house was about six blocks from the bus station. We decided to walk and his hand on mine makes everything better.
"What's going on with that smile?"
"This is wonderful. It's good to be away from...everything. I'm happy to be here with you." I replied.
He pulled me towards him, grabbed my face and kissed my lips. I stumbled by the sudden movement but he grabbed my waist to steady me. The kiss is intimate and slow, I felt chills. Harry rested his forehead on mine and I bit my lip.
"I'm ready," I blurted out. I've been thinking about my decision these days.
His green eyes looked at me in amazement. I thought he would say something sweet about it, but his reaction was the opposite. He put his cold hands inside of my sweater, I was just wearing the sweater so he came into contact with my skin.
"Lucy," he whispered against my lips. He kissed me again and I stood tiptoe. His hands caressed my waist and it felt good.
I really think Harry wants this. Also we never talked about this and he never pressured me. He has been patient, respectful and it's been a long time. I think it’s time, I can't explain, I don't have enough reasons but it feels like the right thing to do. We parted, gasping for air.
"I want you. There are a lots of things I want to do with you," he spoke against my lips. "Plus you've always been untouchable which makes everything more interesting."
I nodded. I didn't know what to say.
"I think you're cute when you don't answer," he smiled. "We’re going to have fun," he assured. He laced his fingers with mine and we started walking.
"I want you too," I blurted out minutes later. My words came out a little forced. "I really do."
He gave me a quick kiss and we kept walking. There is a cute smile on his lips, I am proud to be part of that.
We walked a couple of blocks until we find a neighborhood of houses near the beach. All the houses are cute, some bigger or more elegant than others. The house of Harry's father has a small garden with a bunch of flowers. It's a normal house, it seems clean and it has one floor. He opened the door and entered. I took a deep breath. Two days here. I pushed my fears and followed Harry.
Everything is well decorated, neat and clean. It looks comfy.
"So, your father just gave you the keys and let you come here."
"I stole the key."
"You didn't tell me that, don't you think he's going to notice?"
"I don't think so."
"Are you sure he's not coming?"
"I spoke to his secretary and his schedule is busy. I planned everything, don't worry, Lucy."
After that quick conversation Harry gave me a tour of the house. It didn't take long. There are two rooms but only one has a big bed. I left my bag on the floor and sat on the bed.
"I have our schedule on this paper and I'll put it on the refrigerator."
He sat next to me with our schedule in his hand. The paper was separated into two parts: Saturday and Sunday.
"Forget the nap, we have to go out. First we go for ice cream, then we will go to an aquarium because they are great and we have lunch. After lunch we can rent bikes and have a bike race. After the bikes we get back here to go to the beach. After the beach we bought food and at the end of the day we get ready for go out and drink something," he explained everything. "You can't say no."
My heart melted. I’m very impressed that he has planned everything, he put effort into this and I see he cares and that is important to him.
"I love it."
I looked at the paper and my eyes focused on Sunday.
"Naked Sunday?" I questioned raising my eyebrows. "I-I couldn't walk around the house naked."
He smiled innocently. "Okay, Sunday in underwear."
"Can I wear a shirt?"
"Okay," he rolled his eyes. He put the paper on his pocket and I didn't have the chance to see the activities of the other day. "Get up, we gotta go."
I got up and bent down to pick up my backpack. I don't know what clothes I brought here. I asked Mandy to do it because my thoughts were still in Taylor and everything that happened a few days ago.
Inside the backpack there was a towel, sandals, a black floral dress that my mom gave me, another pair of jeans, a few shirts, a pajama, two pairs of bikini and underwear. I checked the underwear and found a small gift. It was from Mandy. I turned around and Harry was not here. I opened the gift and I wasn't surprised to see that the gift was underwear. It was red and the fabric was soft. Besides the underwear I saw a piece of paper.
Hope you like it, is different from your common underwear.
Harry cares about you and what he's doing it's so sweet and romantic. Have fun and be happy, please. Love you.
I heard Harry call me and kept the gift in my backpack. I braided my hair quickly, I changed my pants for black shorts, grabbed my small purse and left the bedroom. I called my mom and told her everything was fine. I lied saying I would come to the beach with Mandy. Mandy knows about everything and will cover me if mom calls her.
Harry was waiting for me outside. He also changed his clothes, he's now wearing jeans shorts and a white shirt. He looks cozy and cute and I hugged him all the time. He was smelling amazing.
We followed his schedule, we bought an ice cream and headed to the aquarium. I thought it would be a quick visit but I was wrong. Harry talked a lot and I had no idea of his interest about the sea animals. There were different types of fish including a dolphin, we were more time contemplating the animal. It was my first time in an aquarium and the place was simply amazing.
After the aquarium we went for lunch and then went to rent bicycles. We ride along the beach, we did a race but Harry was faster. It was relaxing, the smell of sea and sand were exquisite and a good change from the city.
We go back to the house and the atmosphere between the two is different. I can see that we are genuinely happy, happy to be here and be alone. I don't think there are barriers between us right now, we just went back to being Harry and Lucy.
I grabbed a black bikini and a shirt and went to the bathroom. I got rid of all my clothes and I stared at myself in the mirror with the bikini, it was practically being in lingerie. I needed a tan and the bikini fit well on me. I'm not so bad, I don't look very attractive but I'm okay.
I grabbed my clothes and left the bathroom. I was going to ask Harry if I looked fine. I poked my head into the room and his back was towards me. He was shirtless and wearing his yellow shorts. I pinched my leg and he was real. I cleared my throat and Harry spun around.
"Do you think...I'm okay?" I asked before stepping into the room.
My face felt hot as his eyes scanned my body. I didn't move as he walked towards me. His hand stroked my back and went down to my ass.
"You look great," he said with a cheeky smile.
He leaned toward me, planted kisses from my jaw and my neck. His kisses traveled across my shoulder and his fingers moved my bikini strip sliding down. My skin was hot and I was nervous about his next move. I felt his hot breath on the skin of my breast that was exposed. I thought he would but he didn't move the bikini top. He put the strap back in place and I looked at him in amazement. This was just the start but I was incredibly anxious about the development and the end.
"We should go to the beach."
"Wait," I blurted out and he stopped. I just wanted to try something, I want to see how he reacts.
I kissed Harry resting my hand on the back of his neck. He kissed me back and his hands caressed my body. the caresses were slow and moderate and that was frustrating. I wanted to know if I caused any effect on him. I don't know what to do so I jumped and Harry grabbed me. I managed to wrap my legs around his hips and he started walking.
He left my body on the bed and climbed on top of me. I'm not sexy, I don't know what to do to check that I could cause something in him. I simply kissed him, then I traced kisses down his neck and sucked leaving a mark. I left small marks but stopped when I felt his hand into my bikini bottom. Our eyes connected and a cold finger slid inside me. Oh.
I bit my lower lip, it doesn't hurt but it feels weird. His finger moved slowly and rhythmically. A heat tingled through my stomach.
"Fuck. We have to go to the beach, Lucy," he repeated, but didn't stop.
"Harry, I—"
"We have all night, Lucy," he added.
Due to his statement my cheeks flushed. He's right but I can't avoid the anxiety and curiosity that is growing inside of me. It's better for us to go to the beach, I guess he wants to follow the schedule, he created it and must be important to him. Besides he's doing all this for my birthday.
"Wait," I heard his voice taking me out of my thoughts. "I'll make you come and then we go to the beach, okay?"
It was odd and new to me but somehow I wanted this. My body ignited with his proposal and my hormones were pumped through me. Feeling this way was very new to me but it was inevitable, at some point in my life I would want this, I would like to feel touch of somebody else. I nodded my head and a smile popped in his face. His finger curl up inside me, rubbing my flesh. I closed my eyes and focused on the way he is pushing his finger and how it makes me feel.
His lips meet mine, kissing me slowly and without haste. A pressure rose in my stomach, a wave of satisfaction spread through me but it was not enough. I wanted him to go faster and I think he read my mind because he slipped another finger and moved a little faster but not harshly.
"Baby," he said against my lips.
I moaned in satisfaction, it felt incredibly well. I knew somehow that I was close. I opened my eyes and green-eyed boy was watching me, examining my face. I stifled a moan biting my lip and my thighs tensed. Minutes later I reached an orgasm. My body relaxed and Harry kissed me gently.
"I want more of this and more of you," he whispered before sitting on the bed. "Your moans are cute, by the way," he added before licking the two fingers he used. Is he...? "To the beach, little Lucy. Now," he said and stood up.
+
I looked myself in the mirror again and tied my hair into a ponytail. I inspected my dress one last time and then left the bathroom to go to our room. I grabbed my purse and made my way to the living room. Harry was waiting for me, cute as always. My heart just sank, he was physically too much for me.
He closed the front door and we walked down the street. The sun had set and the sky is nothing but a dark blanket with many bright spots. The nightlife was a few blocks from here.
The beach was good and the weather was nice. We swam a lot, built a sand castle and we even took a nap. It was perfect, I wouldn't change anything. Harry gave me some flowers from the garden and the simple gesture made me very happy. He is doing well, he's changing in a few aspects or he's simply being himself as he truly is. I was happy because he talked a little more about himself, he told me some funny stories about him and Gemma but didn't speak about his parents or his past. Still it was good to hear him.
I see he is more relaxed due to the fact that there are no pressures here, we don't know anyone and our problems remained in our city. I understand that because it happens to me as well.
" I like your dress but is quite short, Lucy," he said slipping his arm around my waist.
My mom gave it to me and I know it's short but this was the best I found tonight. The dress was loose and didn’t reveal my figure. I raised my head to see him.
"I know but—I left you a hickey," I said looking at his neck.
"As revenge I'll make one too."
"Not on my neck."
"I wasn't thinking of your neck, Lucy," he replied, a cheeky smile popped in his face.
There is a kind of tension between us for what might happen tonight. He's more cheeky, I can see he's excited, I guess it's because he's been waiting for too long. Despite the time I think now is the moment, now is our moment.
We chose a bar that had a very beachy style and seemed cheap. We chose a table outside and a waiter gave us the menu. The table and chairs were wooden and in the center of the table there was a nice little candle. The place looked cozy and was lit with different tones.
"So you want to get drunk?" He asked.
"No, I think I'll drink like two glasses."
"Okay, I'll drink the same."
When the waiter returned I ordered a margarita and Harry ordered a sex on the beach. He looked at me when he ordered, I was embarrassed but the waiter didn't notice what was happening. Once we are alone I stared at the beach, I couldn't see the waves but I heard the sound they caused.
"I wouldn't change a single thing about this day, Lucy."
I looked at him and his expression was honest.
"Me neither. When was the last time you felt happy?"
"When you gave me a second chance but you should know I'm really happy when we're together. You help me escape from my problems and forget a little about the messy life I have."
"Your life is not a disaster, it could be worse."
"Your turn, when was the last time you felt happy?"
"You're right, I’m happy when we are together. I was pretty happy when you came to my house and said you were in love with me. "
" I didn’t think you would be happy because you kicked me out and closed the door," he chuckled.
"I know but deep down I was happy because I couldn't believe it. It was overwhelming. I lived for a long time thinking about everything was fake and you came and you said a lot of things that just melted my heart. "
The waiter placed our drinks on the table and left.
"I tried to apologize before, I thought it was guilt but didn't want to admit that I was in love with you because I knew what I had done and knew you deserved better, Lucinda. I know I don't deserve you but I couldn't resist, now I know I wouldn't be able to see you with another guy. "
"I think somehow you've earned, you've opened up to me and that was something you hadn't done before. That was a big difference. Also you were romantic. You just started to fight to get here."
"But it will never be enough," he muttered looking at his drink. "I just want to make up for everything."
"But you're doing it. This is an amazing birthday present," I smiled.
Harry moved his chair to sit beside me. He kissed my shoulder and then our eyes met. His green eyes were intense and caused chills on my skin. I grabbed my margarita and drank from the straw.
"Why wouldn't you be able to see me with another guy?" I inquired curiously.
"Because you're my Lucy," he answered quickly and very sure. "I know you for more than a year and you're the shy girl who this idiot saw at the party. You're the girl that I fell in love unconscious. We have shared many things, our memories belong only to us and I am responsible for several incidents that happened in your life but that was just between you and me. I wouldn’t like to see you sharing or living another things with someone else. That you built other memories and mine remain forgotten. I hate the idea. "
I can't imagine myself with another guy than Harry. Start again and meet another person sounds sad. It would be very weird to share and create new memories with another boy because I'm used to Harry.
"It's just what I think. I can be selfish or jealous but I'm not possessive,” he added.
+
It was really good, I couldn't feel better. I am impressed by the amount of things I can talk to Harry. I feel comfortable again. We drank two drinks and then we left. I am particularly happy.
I really want to put my feet in the sand but Harry is holding my hand and not letting me go. I see a couple of girls who are talking and there is music inside their house.
"Hi!" I greeted them. Harry laughed and his arm slide around my waist.
"Are you okay?"
"I was trying to make friends," I muttered ignoring his question.
"It's late and you need to go to bed."
The last word gave me chills. We walked a couple of blocks, I see young people and I greeted everyone. The world is not spinning, I'm just very happy. I also feel free, for a moment there is nothing inside me, as if all the blame, insecurities, bad times didn't exist. I guess this is one of the reasons why people consume alcohol.
We stop in front of his house. Tonight Harry has a smell of alcohol, his cologne and the beach. He's so attractive. I heard the door and he turned to me. He reached out and I thought about his invitation. It wasn't my duty, I didn't have to do it but my hands were stinging and my stomach was full of butterflies. Suddenly I was not scared, I had a feeling that everything would be fine and for now I could trust him.
Harry gave me flowers, a letter, he apologized, said I was like a daisy, he wrote on my desk, he was a good guy and has been there for me. To me it means a lot because I can see the difference. For me it's enough for now.
"Lucy?"
His fingers touched mine. The distance between us was killing me. I approached him and gave him a short kiss. Our eyes met in the darkness and this time he kissed me. My hands touched his hair and I felt his warm hands on my thighs. His hands lifted me up and I wrapped my legs around his hips.
He entered the house, I heard the door close as Harry walked through the living room into the hallway. I remembered that I was holding my coat and purse, I threw the two objects to the floor and Harry chuckled. We gasped, he rested his forehead on mine and sat on the bed.
"We'll do it slow, it's your first time. Wait, you want to do it?" I nodded in response. "You are not drunk, right? I don't want to—"
"I'm not drunk and yes, I'm sure," I muttered.
"Good. Turn off the light and we will make love, baby," he whispered and I felt chills.
It was another open invitation and it was the last one. I got up and walked to the switch. I turned off the light and spun around to Styles. I didn't move and after a few seconds he stood up and pinned me against the wall, my whole body is nervous but I had already made my decision.
His hands caressed my thighs and then pulled up my dress. I raised my arms and seconds later the garment was on the floor beside my glasses. He got rid of his shirt and I bit my lower lip. Suddenly my throat was dry.
"You look sexy," he said, watching my underwear. I'm wearing the lingerie Mandy gave me.
He kissed me slowly but I deepened the kiss. He caressed my back and unhooked my bra. My heart beat fast when I lost the garment.
"You won't regret it," he whispered.
He kissed my neck and down to my breasts. I stood still as his tongue trace a path around my chest. He glanced up as I felt his fingers into action, massaging and applying an accurate pressure. I held my breath, is this really happening? I know it's real when he kisses me again.
I return the favor and my lips move from his jaw to his neck. His aroma is a mix and is intoxicating. I sucked a specific spot on his skin and he tightened his grip on my waist. I pulled away to look at him. My fingers slid down his arms and then to his torso, his skin was warm and soft. I wanted to kiss every single tattoo. I bent down quickly and kissed the tattoo on his hip.
"Fuck," he growled. "Get up, Lucy," he grabbed my arm and yanked me up. "Two marks, I will have my revenge," he warned in the dark and his voice is quiet.
Styles grabbed my hand and made me sit on the bed. I stepped back, Harry took off his pants and climbed on top of me. He kissed my cheekbone, my cheeks, my collarbone and then he inspected my body.
"Take off your panties, Lucy."
I swallowed but didn't move. His nose leaned against my collarbone, he inhaled the scent of my skin and then his lips rested on my collarbone and sucked hard. It didn't hurt much but I knew what he had done.
"Take off your panties, baby," he repeated.
My fingers pushed down my underwear until it fell on the floor. He sent me a flirty smile before distributing kisses on my skin. I felt chills as his mouth descended.
"You're cute and I cannot believe you're here with me," he murmured with his lips on my thigh. "I'm in love with you, okay? Don't forget that."
Harry spread my legs and the anticipating was going to kill me. I closed my eyes as I felt his tongue slide down my center. His tongue laps me slowly in specific patterns, teasing me and my body responds shuddering as waves of pleasure dissipate through me. I'm really embarrassed but I can't help but moan. The urgency in me increases.
"Damn, I've waited so long to do this again. You're so addictive, I don't plan to move from here, Lucy," he said, his breath vanished on my skin.
I leaned on my elbows with very, very flushed cheeks. Harry winked at me but didn't stop. My breathing is no longer constant. I feel the way his tongue touches my weak spots. It's amazing how you feel and how the pressure builds up inside you.
"Don't move," he warned. It was really difficult because I felt he was torturing me with how good he made me feel. “Don’t move, baby,” he warned again.
He gently pushed a finger inside me and his lips sucked hard on my inner thigh. I closed my eyes when he slipped another finger and moved faster without hurting me. My body was about to give in but suddenly Harry pulled his fingers out of me. The absence of his touch was unbearable, I felt that I needed him.
"What? Why?" I asked confused and the tattooed boy chuckled.
"That was cute," he kissed my lips. "I need you wet, I don't want to hurt you so much."
I swallowed hard and the anticipation was about to kill me again. I shuddered. This was going to happen, we're going to make love. Harry took off his boxers and my eyes focused on his erection. How? I haven't done anything. I quickly analyzed the length, I had no way to compare it but how will it fit...?
"Lucy, stop staring at my dickk," I heard Harry and looked up. It was my first time, it was impossible not to look.
"Are you ready, baby?" He asked holding the silver package in his hand.
I grabbed the silver package and opened it. Harry looked at me in amazement. I leaned in to kiss him one more time.
"I'm ready, Harry."