loading......99.9% "Beast" [#Wattys2022]

30

It was a new day, in the same old building. My heart was a coal, looking at them, would set fire in my chest. And the smoke could steam up and flow out through tears.

I never chased Zen but our time of conversation became less.

"Fight for your right!" He would say. Where I would plan to give up where the rush was too much for my chances to get closer.

I never quit writing letters because they kept me occupied. 

It was evening nevertheless, I was suffering from the aftermath of the poison and the stomach wash.

"There is someone who wants to talk to you." Zen said. He added. "Should I give her your number?"

She couldn't wait. By checking my messenger I saw an unknown girl with the name Ann.

"I want you to stay away from Zen."

I was confused and lost.

"What? How do you know me?"

"I know everything about you."

"Like?"

"Your parents divorce, and much more."

The world slipped out of my very two feet I felt feet less. My processors failed. My jaw dropped open.

Then she might also know about my letters. I was embarrassed. That's the only thing I never wanted to tell people. 

"How do you know?"

"Zen, never hides a thing from me."

"How much do you know?"

"I also know the love letters you have sent. You are so shameless. I am telling you, stay away from him!"

I hid my face in my palm as I shrieked. My face red as an apple, I buried in myself in my palms and tears rushed out. He has misused my trust, my feelings.

She humiliated me. And that's the least bit of things I ever tolerated.

"Who is Ann?" I asked Zen.

"She is a friend I was talking about."

"Yeah, you are always seem to be talking about your 'FRIENDS.' Well no offense here, why have you shared my personal information with her? Like you shared my secrets as a fun story with your folks, am I just a laughing stock for you?"

"You are getting wrong. I don't know how she knows that."

"Oh a prophecy came to her and told her what's going in my life. Let's forget the divorce, you actually shared my letters? I gave them to you. They were personal! I could have mailed your friends in order to prove them how pure I am. Suppose I do the same to you how will you defend,  no what will you defend first, the shame I pulled you in or the trust issues? Something are kept really private. When people get to know them they start judging them. "

I hated when my feeling came out in public, because people judged me like back then.

"Naomi! you sure you are with the right person."

"He is like a beast! too ugly to be stared at."

"I didn't realized he was suffering from the society I was too ignorant but then things were already too complicated and Andrew cheated me with a girl who always used me to show him she is a narcissist. She whipped my beast and filled him with love to heal his scars. People would fill his head, pretty faces have many options. These were those people who had their own motives. We walked away knowing we don't need each other. " 

"People always lead me to this fate and sadly they are the people I care about."

"No! What are you talking about?"

Ann texted me "when did I mentioned anything related to letters?"

"I haven't talked about letters." He added. "Maybe, my whatsapp is hacked."

"That was the lamest excuse I have ever heard."

In anyway they both knew about my personal stuff only one person knew it not even Leah and not even Jess.

I could have never found out, Zen had this side too. I was disappointed.

I left it the way it was, someone was lying.

"Listen Morrison, I never want to see you again, kindly restrain from appearing in front of me."

************

My heart was stabbed by the person I thought was not a bit like others. I was wrong.

I walked feeling guilty. If only Leah never dogged me in texting him.

He lied, an act makes him a good liar, but I went against the people and their impression of Zen, that makes I threw a fit for nothing?

My heart was all poked in my needles and every time I would deny the fact, this is too much. I should forgive. I laughed at my own helplessness that I love him. I always forgived him. Because he knows better than any of us.

"Our department is organizing an event. We want organizers. And Naomi see me after this." I sighed.

"You will handle decoration." Teacher said.

First task was, assigning people who will work as my hand.

"Hey juniors, you see this is our event we need people. I was wondering if you guys can volunteer."

Someone from the back cleared her throat.

I turned,

"Jess."

I hugged her.

"Where were you. She asked."

"A lot happened." I shrugged.

We started our preparations and I took a day off.  I was working in front of the library when he appeared in white shirt and sun glasses. And of course his fiance Isabelle being lovey dovey.

I looked at him, but with the glasses on, only he knew the movement of his eye balls.

It ached my heart. If love is suppose to hurt then why people call it a paradise? He sat there. I was tortured and flared up.

"Focus! Naomi, work is important than his lies." I snapped myself out.

Though we stopped talking but I never blocked him, I would tell myself blocking someone is denying their existence.

So I would never insult him. The day was getting closer and closer. And we had much things to do.