The room 102 - z.m fics

Save us

Describing a mistake to a child can be our hardest decision but Zayn used the right way to express it. It was a game, just a little stupid game where all of us played it wrong. If I won ? I can say I did. I won him.

- can I play one day ? Can we play now ?
- Brother..you can't play this, it's something that you would like.
- but I love to play games! - Cameran kept insisting - I wanna play with you and Chris !
- Baby.. - I looked at Zayn - let me explain him. - Zayn gave me space for I stay in front of Cameran - look Cameran, we can play millions of games, everything you want, we can invite our own characters! You can be Batman!
- I want to be my own hero, it sucks to copy them.
- what ? - Zayn jumped in the conversation - what do you mean ?
- it sucks to copy a superhero that doesn't even exist.
  I never expected a child in that age to say something like that. I used to believe they were real, I used to believe he thought they were real.
- they are just characters - he kept talking with a sad face - my own hero is you and you! - he pointed at us.
- Since..since when you think like that ?
- since I saw you saving Chris, brother.
- when ?
- you told me, brother.
  Zayn had a simple smile on his face, I felt like they had much more in common than I could ever imagine. That little kid knew more than I do, Zayn told him everything he knew. I felt that. He told him, but how can a big boy tell a little boy things that we only do when we are in love ? How can he say that he saved my life ? What does he think when he says that ?
- Zayn, we need to talk. - I whispered.
- no.. - Cameran said when we were trying to go to kitchen - Zayn didn't tell you ?
- what does he have to tell me, love ?
- that he saved you.
- he..he did it a lot of times.
- this morning.
My heart stopped. I looked at Zayn automatically without saying a word, yet I was thinking too much, on everything.
- Cameran..what do you know ?
- I know that you grabbed that toy, and you went to outside and when you came back, you took Chris to our house.
- toy ? Which toy ?
- the one that you had in the box.
- Cameran how do you know I took it with me ?
- I saw you going there, I saw you grabbed the little toy and running. I wasn't sleeping..I'm sorry, I lied.
- Cameran, go to your room ok ? We will talk about this later..
- promise ?
- I promise, brother. I love you.
  He followed what Zayn said. Now I got even more worried. Does the little kid know about the gun ?
- Chris..it's such a long story.
- and I want to know everything.
- okay. In the day I bought this gun home..I planned my suicide.
- Zayn..Zayn, what ?
- please babe - he held my hands - let me finish, don't do this. I was going to do it, I was already dating her when I realized I wanted to disappear, I wanted..to go. I couldn't just be here with nothing. I planned everything in the best way but in the night I was going to explode with this brain..he appeared in my room saying he couldn't sleep. He caught me with the gun on my hands..and asked me..why I was with a gun at night. I decided to hide in the box, the box with the letters..and I explained him that
- it was a toy.
- yes. That it was a toy that we only use when..we need to save ourselves.