Sidharth was in a deep and peaceful sleep and he had been the whole night since his beautiful girl had slept so peacefully, snuggled up in his chest.
Even last night after she had slept, he had stayed up for quite some time, his mind constantly playing her words from the gazebo and the way she broke down in front of him, how heartbroken and upset she had been. It had shaken and completely devastated him.
She was right in feeling this way. It's not about closeness, it's about what is being done and by whom. If your biological parents torture you like some enemies, what else are you supposed to feel and think?
His heart was just so sad for his beautiful baby.
She didn't deserve any of this. He knew, he knew
that her healing would take time, it was going to be a hard and long journey, but he was sure that they'll get through because he was going to make sure they do.
He knew his Sana wanted to heal too. She wanted to leave all of this behind and move on too but she was just unable to.
So he was going to make sure that he fills her life, her mind, her heart with so much love, that there's no room left for any pain or trauma or fears.
He wanted her to fly. He wanted her to be fearless. He wanted her to know how precious, how special and how pure she was.
He didn't want her to harbor any kinds of fears , doubts or insecurities in her mind.
Thought it had completely broken him, he was so grateful that she shared her heart with him and told him what bothered or hurt her.
He wanted her to share everything with him, let it out of her system, get it off his chest but he wasn't going to force or pressurize her into anything.
There were still so many untouched conversations between them. He saw she had panicked and tried stopping him when he was pulling the strap of her dress down and how scared she had gotten thinking he was going to pull the dress down.
He still remembered how she was constantly trying to clutch and pull the towel up her body when he had sponged her. This wasn't his Sana. This is not how his Sana had to or should be.
He didn't realize when he gave into his exhaustion and all these thoughts and dozed off.
It was probably when he felt her rub her nose on his chest and snuggle deeper in to him. he sighed and closed his own eyes.
His eyes finally stirred open after the long and peaceful night. That too because he could feel her constantly moving in her sleep.
She seemed restless and he could constantly feel her moving and getting fidgety in his hold. That stirred him up from his deep comfortable sleep.
He slowly opened his eyes and the room was lit up because of the sun rays. He lifted his head to look at her. She was still asleep but she had a frown on her face and she seemed quite restless.
He kept observing her for a few seconds to make sure what was wrong. Was she up, was she still asleep, what was happening?
Soon she stopped moving and he saw how the frown on her forehead also relaxed as she probably fell back asleep.
He sighed and threw his own head back on the pillow again, closing his eyes. He was holding her closely to himself and he could feel the slow rising and falling of her chest.
He almost smiled at how peacefully she was sleeping. He quickly lifted his head again and pressed a very small and quiet kiss to the top of her head, he had to. He just couldn't control himself.
A few minutes later when Sidharth was again falling asleep, Sana moved again. She squirmed uncomfortably in his hold making him open his eyes again. Something was definitely bothering her.
He frowned as he lifted his head up to look at her. Her eyes were still closed but the frown on her forehead was back and she looked visibly irritated with something.
"Sana?" he whispered her name very slowly to make sure she was up.
She didn't respond but the discomfort on her face was very much there. He lightly pressed her shoulder to see what was up.
He was so confused. Something was clearly wrong but he couldn't understand what. She was apparently still asleep but was bothered by something in her sleep. Was she having a bad dream? Or was she feeling okay?
Just when he was thinking of all the possibilities, she whimpered, immediately alerting him.
His eyes widened as he looked at her closely.
Shit. Was she in some pain? He tried looking at her face or pulling it out of his chest to have a better look.
"Mmm..Si..dharth" she whimpered his name again.
"Sana?? Sana, kya hua?" he asked her but her frown just deepened.
He was really getting worried now, something was definitely up with her.
He tried pulling her face out of his chest slowly.
"Mmmm" she tried resisting.
"Shhh shhh" he told her as he took her head out of his chest and carefully placed her head on the pillow.
"Sana? Bacha kya hua hai? Theek hai tu? Kuch ho raha hai kya?" he whispered softly as he was slightly towered up over her face and sweetly caressing her cheeks, pushing her hair away from her face.
The frown was still there on her forehead and her eyes shut.
She slowly opened her eyes hearing his voice.
The moment she opened her eyes, she was met with his messy, beautiful, swollen face. His hair were disheveled and his eyes slightly swollen with all the sleeping.
But they had so much of concern in them, she could see it clearly. His face was towering over her as he looked at her.
She was still blinking slowly and lazily, trying to come in to consciousness.
"Kya ho gaya baba? Theek hai tu?" he asked softly as his fingers sweetly pressed her cheeks.
She pouted lightly and shook her head, scaring him.
"Kyun??Kya hua?" his voice went up a notch and his eyes were suddenly wide and alert with concern.
"Mmm" she was being such a baby right now.
He was so in love with her.
"Tch..baba bole gi nahi tou mujhe kese pata chale ga, hmm? Bol naa" he asked softly.
She didn't know what or how to tell him. She had been ignoring it for quite some time now, trying harder to fall back asleep so that it goes away on its own but it was just not leaving, disrupting her sleep completely.
His eyes were staring in to her sleepy swollen eyes.
She lazily rubbed her eyes with the back of her hand with that same pout and frown on her face. His eyes were boring into hers with so much concern and attentiveness.
"Wo" she mumbled softly.
He slowly raised his eyebrows.
She slowly turned around facing the other side, confusing him. He was so confused and also a tad bit scared.
"Sana kya..."
She quickly grabbed his hand and brought it around her stomach stopping him right there. He frowned. Before he could comprehend anything, his breath hitched.
She grabbed his hand and dragged it down between her legs, pressing it right across her center.
His heart was in his mouth as his eyes widened. He could hear his heart hammering inside his chest wildly.
What was she doing at this time? Did she..want something right now or...?
"San..." he mumbled her name.
"Umm..." she pressed his palm harder.
"Baby? Mujhe pata hota k Bali anay ka itna acha asar honay wala hai tujh par tou mai tujhe bohaaaat pehle hi le aata... I mean, subah subah hi tujhe.."
"Sidhaaaarthh...shushhh" she interrupted him, her cheeks heating up.
His eyes were lighter now and a small smirk on his lips.
He pressed a small kiss to her jaw.
"I mean, not that I'm complaining at all, but itni subah subah...itni bechain ho rahi thi tu kya?" he rasped, his voice getting lower and heavier as he slightly lifted his head up from the pillow to look at her.
"Sidhaaaarth chup raho...aisa...aisa kuch nahi jesa aap soch rahay ho" she mumbled in an irked tone.
"Mhm?" he bent his face and rubbed his nose on her cheek.
"Tou phir kesa hai? Aur phir mera haath wahan kya kar raha hai subah subah? Hmmm?" he pressed his fingers harder eliciting a small sigh from her.
She closed his eyes, unable to meet or take his intense gaze and proximity.
"Wo...mujhe...mujhe wahan ajeeb si gandi si stinging feeling aur dard ho rahi hai" she whispered.
His narrowed eyes immediately widened and he straightened up, concerned and alert.
He frowned and looked down at where his hand was.
"Kya?? Dard? Kyun?? Are you okay? Is your period due?" his voice was suddenly filled with concern and worry.
She just pressed herself more in to his body and kept her own hand at the top of his wrist.
She then shook her head.
"Then? Kya hua phir? Dard kyun ho rahi hai baba? Aur ankhe khol, lemme look at you" he spoke softly.
She slowly opened her eyes and turned her face the slightest bit to meet his eyes.
"Kya ho gaya? Kyun ho rahi hai dard baba?" he asked softly.
She blinked softly and she felt her neck heating up. how was she supposed to repeat it.
"Wo.." she spoke in a small voice.
"Wo..kal ...kal raat I was sitting on your lap na and jab you...touched me...so wo because of the uncomfortable positioning, your fingers were touching me in a very tight sa space..like your fingers didn't have proper space na..so wo tight hogaya...aur iss liye abhi thora icky si dard hai..it's not a lot..par hai thori" she mumbled in a low whisper, her cheeks and entire neck heating up.
She was so shy but she had to just blurt it out.
His eyes widened in realization. Oh fuck. She was right.
He remembered how passionate and intense they had gotten last night when she came and sat on his lap like that.
She sat on his lap in such a way that it was pretty hard and uncomfortable for him to touch her down there but yet he did and he remembered how she had even complaint of pain last night after which he laid her down on the bed and went ahead. Shit.
He looked at her face.
"Crap. I'm so sorry baby. Shit. Zaada dard hai kya?" he asked in a small guilty voice.
She sighed loudly.
"Shushhh. Bas aaap..dabaao aisay..theek ho jayega..zada nahi hai..aur khabardaar agar sorry bola..it was so hot last night" she whispered shyly.
He was looking at her so intensely. His eyes and face was filled with so many emotions suddenly. Guilt, passion, lust, insane love, concern, all of it. He kept looking at her so closely and so keenly.
"Sachiiii" she spoke like a child, melting his heart instantly on a pan.
His eyes finally relaxed and softened as a small smile came on his lips.
He bent and pressed his lips softly on her cheek.
"Pagal" he whispered sweetly.
He kept the side of his own face on top of her face as he properly and softly pressed the pads of his fingers deeper between her legs.
A loud sigh left her lips as he comforted her. He was so perfect.
"You drive me so crazy baby" he rasped on top of her cheek as he lightly bit her jaw.
She winced.
"Kyun?" she whispered, enjoying his torture.
"Kyun kya matlab? Ye abhi kya karwa rahi hai mujhse, hmm? Kitna tang karti hai mujhe" he spoke huskily as he sweetly pressed her.
"Tou...dard bhi tou aap ne hi dia na" she answered in a lighter voice, teasing him.
He sensed the humor in her tone and a small smile appeared on his lips and he stopped his fingers.
She quickly looked at him with a frown, eliciting a small chuckle from him.
"Ruke kyun?" she complaint sweetly.
Dear God, this girl would drive him to the brink of insanity.
"Main kyun karu tera kaam? Mujhe kya milega badle main?" he teased her coming right on top of her face.
Her eyes widened and a small gasp left her lips. his warm breath was literally falling on her lips. and there was this unmissable smirk on his lips.
"Hawww..kitne kameene ho...apko kya faida chahiye? Aur..aap kyun nahi karoge mera kaam?' she mumbled sweetly, with the smallest of pouts on her lips.
"Kyun karu?" he rasped coming closer to her lips.
"Kyunki..mere ho naa" she whispered with such purity and confidence, it halted his breath.
"Hamesha" he whispered in a thick voice.
"Tou phir?" she asked.
"Mujhe bhi kuch acha milna chahiye na as a reward. Don't you think so? You disturbed my sleep, woke me up, aur subah subah mere self-control ko test kar k mujhse itna kaam karwa rahi hai, tou mujhe bhi tou kuch acha sa de" he teased huskily.
Her heart was beating so wildly for this man. He was so charming.
"Neeche ho" she whispered looking at his lips.
A small smile came on his lips as he bent even lower, their lips almost brushing together.
She softly pressed her lips on his, closing her eyes. She sweetly took his lower lip inside hers and sucked on to it.
A loud sigh left his throat as he started pressing his fingers between her legs. He let her kiss him just how she wanted.
She kissed him so softly and so sweetly, it was constantly tugging at his heartstrings.
"So perfect" he rasped on top of her swollen lips the moment they parted.
Her shy, but so full of love eyes were looking in to his.
"Ab khush ho?" she gasped.
"Bohat. Aur kya kya karu tere liye?" he teased her as he pressed his fingers harder in to her center and started pressing soft kisses all over her jaw.
"Mmmm" she closed her eyes as he filled her up with so much love and sensations.
"You're so perfect Sana. The most perfect girl to ever exist" he whispered as he peppered kisses to her neck.
"Aap bhi sab se zada perfect ho mere guddduu" she said sweetly.
He smiled and smacked a loud kiss to her cheek before lifting his face up and looking at her.
"But jokes aside, abhi kesa hai dard?" he asked her.
"Abhi theek hai...acha lag raha hai ab" she gave him a small smile.
"Perfect..agar zada dard ho rahi thi tou raat ko roka kyun nahi mujhe?" he said.
"Kyun? Main kyun rokti? Mujhe...acha lag raha tha naa...aur jab mujhe letna tha tou mene bola tha naa" she confessed shyly.
He smiled at that.
"Bilkul pagal hai tu" he bent and kissed her chin sweetly.
She closed her eyes and let him comfort her for another few minutes while she comfortably lay in his arms and enjoyed his warmth around her.
A few minutes later she kept her own hand on top of his.
"Bas" she said softly.
"Pakka theek hai abhi?" he asked her.
She nodded her head.
She then grabbed his fingers and brought his hand to her lips, pressing a soft kiss to his palm.
"Thank you" she said shyly.
"Shhh" he gave her a smile and kept his head back on the pillow and hugged her small body completely in to his, spooning her.
"Theek se soya tu?" he asked her sweetly with his eyes closed and a small peaceful smile on his lips.
Her heart, her entire soul was a mess, it was a puddle.
She wordlessly nodded his head, hugging his arm to her stomach.
"Aap theek se soye?" she asked him.
"The best. I always sleep the best with my baby" he mumbled.
Sana smiled at that.
"Sidhaarth?"
"Hmmm" he nuzzled his nose in her hair, pressing a soft kiss to it.
"Aaj hum kya karenge?" she asked.
He smiled.
"I have the entire plan for today sorted. Aaj tujhe ek bohat hi khoobsurat jaga le k Janay wala hoon. You'll love it" he told her.
"Okay" she smiled.
"Aur usey pehle mere bache ko bohat hi acha sa nashta karane waala hoon abhi. She'll love that too" he said softly, hoping for her to get a little excited at least.
"Mhm" she smiled and just squeezed his hand tighter.
After a few seconds, she spoke again
"Sidharth?" she mumbled.
"Hmm?"
"Jab mai..nahi thi..matlab..jab..main Punjab mai thi..tou aap ne sab se zaada mere baare mai..kya miss kia? Aap..kya sochte they..jab main..nahi thi?" she asked him in a small voice.
He opened his eyes at her question and his heart skipped a beat as the entire period flashed through his eyes. he unconsciously grabbed her tighter and pulled her closer in to himself, their bodies completely pressed together.
Her back stuck to his front. Sana could feel the urgency in his hold. She wanted to cry.
"Koi ek baat kese bolu? Jab har second, every second that I was breathing, I was missing everything about you like a mad man Sana.
I was not just missing you, I was literally desperate for you. Everything about you" he said softly as he pressed a soft kiss to the back of her hair.
Sana closed her eyes at that and held him closer.
"Har cheez. Har baat, tujhe paaglo ki tarah dhoondhta tha poore ghar mai. Teri awaaz, teri mehak, teri presence, teri hassi, sab kuch The way you take my name, jese tu bacho ki tarah mujhe chipakti hai.
Sab kuch paaglo ki tarah miss kia baba. Miss doesn't even begin to explain it. I was craving and so fucking needy for the feel of your body.The way it feels around me, in my arms. I was so scared baba" he breathed slowly, releasing it all out.
Sana pursed her lips tightly as her eyes filled up with painful hot tears.
"I..I know...I'm so.." her voice cracked.
"SHHHH" he pressed his lips to the back of her head keeping them there for a while.
"Don't. It's all over now. I have my baby back . Never letting you go now" he spoke with an unnerving conviction.
"Sana?" he said her name with such softness and love, it melted her entire fucking being.
"I want you to know and remember one thing. Uss time I may have reacted in a very different way, I may have absolutely entirely lost my fucking mind over you leaving Sana, par uska ye har giz matlab nahi hai k tu ne jaa kar ghalat kia. KABHI, not even for a single second, I don't want you to ever think that you did something wrong by going.
Yes, I shouldn't have let you go alone in that shithole, par tera decision ghalat nahi tha baba.
You went and showed them who you are. You showed how invincible you are, how fierce, how perfect you are.
Tu datti rahi baba, larti rahi, all alone, all by yourself, sab kuch, eke k cheez sehti rahi, leti rahi, phir bhi tooti nahi, do you realize how strong you are? I'm so in awe of your strength baby.
You showed them how they can no longer control you, you fought back, you gave it back to them.
Tu ne apne liye, apni khushi k liye larra, tu kisi se nahi darri bacha. It showed and taught you how strong you really are.
Tou wo ghalat kese ho sakta hai? Tu kamzor nahi hai meri jaan. Aur tu ne wahan akele jaa kar, un sab ko akele deal kar k, unke agay na jhuk kar ye dikha dia. You're the strongest woman I know Sana" he said softly.
She shivered in his hold at that.
"And I'm not just saying this because of this one time Sana. Yes, this majorly but all your life?
You've seen so much, dealt with so much, been through so much, taken in so much and still managed to have one of the most purest, untainted souls anyone can ever have and so there is truly nobody like you.
There never was, there never can be Sana. I'm so fucking proud of the woman you are, and I'm even prouder and luckier that you're mine" his voice was low but so powerful and confident, she felt it in her soul.
"Si..dharth" she whispered in her cracked voice.
She was so desperate to turn around and kiss him.
"Sach hai baba. Ek dam sach. Tu sab se zada strong hai. Putting a halt to everything, your life, your happiness, your peace and deciding to go and put your foot down for something that has been haunting you forever requires courage Sana, inexplicable courage and you were a living example of that courage.
You took that call. You made that decision, you went all alone, in that hellhole, and you remained steadfast throughout.
I'm so fucking proud bacha. You're my little baby, you'll always be my little baby but that's just for me.
Otherwise, never, never for a second think of yourself as weak. You're the strongest woman I've ever known. And I'm so beyond grateful that you chose me" he laid his entire heart out.
Sana's heart and her entire being was a lost cause. She was just so emotional, so taken by this man and the way he made her feel, the way he loved her.
She didn't know how to let it out, or how to deal with it and explain what he does to her. She was so in love.
"Mmm..murna haiii" she whispered softly while trying to free his hands from around her so that she could turn around and look at him.
He slowly removed his hands from around her so that she could turn, she did. She slowly turned around to look at the man who had her entire soul in his palms.
Her red and glossy eyes were staring back at him with so much love and purity.
She saw how his eyes were painful too. He slowly tucked her hair behind her ear and cupped her cheek, rubbing his thumb softly on her cheek.
"Agar koi tujhe mujhse door karne ki koshish karay gaa..agar koi mere se flirt karne ki koshish karay, agar koi mere aur tere beech mai anay ki koshish karay tou tu kya karegi?" he asked hr softly but his tone had so much calmness to it, like he already knew the answer.
Her lips slightly jutted out and her brows slightly furrowed.
"Main...unko noch daalungi, tukre kar doongi aur kutto ko daal doongi, phaad k rakh dungi mai...aap sirf mere ho, koi aankh tou utha k dekhe" she said innocently but with an unmissable fierceness.
He smiled softly.
"Exactly. So? Hui na tu meri sherni? You are the strongest person I know. You're so fucking perfect baba" he smiled knowingly and softly.
She erupted in to a small sob at that and quickly grabbed his face with her small hands.
"Aaap..itna pyaar kyun karte ho?" she cried softly.
"Kyun karte ho matlab?" he narrowed his eyes comically.
"Na karun phir? Tujhe nahi karu tou aur kya Nisha ko jaa k dhoondh k usko karu?" he teased her.
She gasped loudly and her little nostrils flared as she smacked his cheek lightly.
"Khabardaar. Mu torr dungi main aapka" she said angrily as she brought her face closer to his, their noses almost touching.
He smiled slowly at that.
"Mhm? Phir kya karegi?" he asked her in a low husky voice.
"Phir...zorr se kiss karungi aapko..aisi jese aap ne kabhi sochi bhi nahi hogi" she whispered slowly, her eyes softening and flickering down to his lips.
"Kese karegi? Kar k dikha" he rasped.
She quickly looked up in his dark eyes and before another second passed, she softly pressed her lips to his taking them in hers.
She kissed him so passionately and so fully, he actually lost his mind. He groaned in her mouth as she pushed her tongue inside his mouth and explored every corner.
"So fucking perfect" he gasped on top of her lips as he wiped her lips softly.
"You are" she responded shyly.
He smiled and pressed a sweet kiss to her forehead.
"Abhi dard tou nahi ho raha?" he asked her softly.
She shook her head shyly.
"Sidhaarth?" she whispered his name softly, making him smile.
"Hmm"
"Wo jab aap...apni flight se wapis aaye they...mere Punjab Janay se pehle..jab aap ne mujhe wese dekha tha...aur mu...mujhe panic attack bhi aaya tha jis raat...uss raat aap...darr gaye they na mujhe dekh kar?" she asked softly.
His breath hitched and his eyes widened as he remembered that awful night.
That panic, that fear, that terrible heart sinking feeling he had gone through the minute he stepped inside the silent house and found her lying lifeless on the sofa. her face, her sunken eyes, her terrible screams and cries, her desperation for him, her fear of what they'll do to her, it had shaken his entire core like nothing else ever had.
He unknowingly held her tighter and looked at her face. She was already staring up at his face with her soft eyes.
"Sa...Sana...baba...tu kyun wo sab ki baat abhi k..."
"Kyunki mujhe sab kuch bahir nikaalna hai apne andar se..har darrr..har gandi feeling jisey aap guzre mujhe dekh kar, wo sab mujhe bas bahir nikaalna hai...aapko kitni takleef di mene ..apko kitna daraya mene..aap kitna darr gaye they naa Sidharth? Aap ko kitna pareshaan kiya mene..aap" she was mumbling softly when he intervened.
"Shhhh.. Don't. Pagal hai tu? Tu ne kuch nahi kia meri jaan. Haan bohat darr gaya tha main Sana, I lost my fucking mind seeing you like that. I wanted to burn the whole world down.
I felt so helpless, so scared. and the fact that you were alone for a day and a half like that, it scared me senseless. Par uss sab mai teri kahin, koi ghalti thori thi bacha? Wo sab tou halaat they na. don't ever blame yourself for anything.
Yes it was tearing me apart seeing you go through it all but you? You were actually living it. Kitna seham gaya tha mera bacha, I wanted to cry so much Sana.
I'm so sorry you had to go through all of that. My beautiful baby" he said softly as his eyes bore in to her wet ones.
Her lips slightly parted at that and she grabbed his face in her hands.
" Sorry mat kaho..mujhe bas ..aap chahiye they..main darr gayi thi Sidharth unke phone aur dhamkiyon k baad..mai soch bhi tou nahi sakti thi na apko chor k Janay ka..aap se alag honay ka..iss liye bas main darr gayi thi..aur phir aap they bhi nahi na uss time iss liye zada darr gayi thi..aur baad mai dekho..khudi aapko chor k chal.."
Before she could complete, he quickly pressed his lips to hers, kissing her softly.
A low whimper left her throat as her eyes fell closed and she gripped his face harder.
"Don't" he said firmly as they parted.
Sana was quietly staring at his face and into his eyes. Her heart was bursting and literally overflowing with the intensity and kind of love she was feeling for him. it was insane.
She felt like she just couldn't express or explain it enough.
She lifted her face up and pressed a sweet kiss to his forehead. He smiled at that.
"Aap mere angel ho." She smiled softly.
His eyes lit up at that as he remembered something and decided to lighten her up a bit.
"Oh really?" he smirked.
She quickly nodded.
"Jhooti" he teased.
She frowned and gasped softly.
"Jhoot kyun bolungi? Sach hai bilkul" she explained cutely, with a frown.
"Mom ko bhi tou yahi bolti hai...decide kar kon tera angel hai? Sabko bolti rehti hai" he teased her.
"Ahaaaaan" she sweetly smacked his cheek, very softly, very lovingly.
"Wo...wo bhi hain...aap dono ho na" she said softly.
His eyes softened and his smirk was softly turning in to a sweet small smile as she spoke again
"Aap dono sach main ho mere angels Sidharth..kyunki aap dono ko milne k bad hi tou..mujhe pata laga pyaar aur zindagi aur rishte aur jeena kisey kehte hain...aap dono ne hi tou mujhe zindagi ki har khushi di hai..mujhe sambhaala, apnaya, itna zada pyaar diya hai..tou aap dono huay na mere angels?" she said softly.
His heart was flipping. His eyes and his face instantly softened hearing that.
"Par...aap?" she said again after a brief pause as her fingers caressed his cheek.
"Aapp sirf mere angel nahi ho Sidharth..aap tou..poori zindagi ho na...poori duniya ho aap...aap ki hi waja se meri saansein hain, meri khushi hai, mera sab kuch hai aap se..aur Maa bhi tou aap ne hi mujhe di na...aap ki hi waja se wo mili mujhe...so aap meri zindagi ki har achi cheez k, har khushi k, har khoosburat rishte ki waja ho...so aap literally meri zindagi k wo angel ho jisey bhagwan ne literally sirf mere liye bheja to bring the entire universe's happiness for me..so aap..tou sab kuch ho" she confessed softly.
His breath hitched and his heart was no longer beating inside his chest. It was literally slipping out of his chest and falling at her feet.
Why was she so bloody perfect and so pure? Didn't she know, it was actually her who was really his angel and the light of his life.
He gulped harshly, trying to swallow the lump forming in his throat. He felt like he was choking and drowning in her love.
"Sana..please" he whispered.
"I love you so much Sidharth. So much. I mean, my heart, my entire body, my soul it's all yours. It's you. Just you. Aap k liye pagal hoon main.
Aap mera sab kuch ho pata hai? Jis raat aap mujhe pehli baar deh kar Pandaal se apne ghar utha kar laaye they, uss raat bhi I felt it but I didn't know it back then k uss raat k liye, mere behosh honay k liye, aur aapka mujhe wahan dekhne ka main itna thankful hongi..kyunki wo pehli baar tha when I saw what a perfect man you are.
You saw a stranger fainting and you didn't think twoce before helping her and bringing her home, taking care of her, making her feel so safe so secure in your presence.
Maybe I didn't know it back then but I probably fell in love with you that night itself. You were so perfect.
My Sidharth. Mera kabhi aise kisi ne poori zindagi khayal nahi rakhta tha..jese aap ne uss raat rakha, despite meeting me for the first time.
And then after that, every single time, you kept claiming my heart bit by bit with everything you did for me. Main ek sach baat bolu? Ek secret confession?" she asked him innocently.
Sidharth was so speechless and so numb and so in awe of her right now. he was just so taken by her.
He couldn't blink. He didn't know how to. He didn't want that millisecond of blinking to get in the way of him not looking at her.
He slowly raised his eyebrows for her to continue.
"Wo..main na shuru main...jab hum bilkul naye naye mile they...jab aap ne mujhe agle din mere ghar drop kia na? Pandaal wali raat k baad? Uske baad se har baar mai bahane dhoondhti thi k kisi tarah aap se mil loon...remember wo bank k kaam k liye jab mene apki help maangi thi?
Main..ne bohat socha tha k na maangu, aur kisi aur se keh doon k madad kard e, office mai kisi larki se..ya khud net pe dhoondh k kar loon..par mera dil..usko chain hi nahi araha tha...baar baar mujhe keh raha tha k bas aapko phone karu, aap se help maangu, issi bahane I'll get to see you again..aur jab wo kaam bhi hogaya tou I was already thinking of how will I meet you next now?
Ab aur kya aisa hoga jisey mai ab dubara aap se milungi? I didn't understand any of it, but I just... I just wanted to be around you..it made me happy" she laid her entire heart out in front of him.
He wanted to pass out. This was too much.
She gave him the sweetest smile after that as she pulled his face closer and pressed a sweet kiss to the tip of his perfect nose and then below it, on top of his upper lip.
He inhaled sharply at that and held her tighter.
"You're driving me insane...I'm a lost cause Sana. I don't even know what to say or do anymore. I'm so fucking in love with you, it scares me" he rasped in a thick voice.
"Aap mere baby ho na? Mera sab kuch ho guddu. Jab aap ne..mujhe pehli baar kiss kia...mera dil band hogaya tha... I didn't know aisi bhi koi feeling exist karti hai...I wanted it so much more...I wanted it all the time... I was so needy for you..all the time.. I still am... I will always be, Sidharth" she whispered in a low but stromg voice.
"Fuck" he gasped as he slammed his lips harshly on hers.
He took her lower lip inside his mouth and clutched it between his teeth, eliciting a low whimper from her as she held him closer.
He bit her lip to his heart's content and then immediately took it inside his mouth, sucking on to it softly.
He kissed her so much, she was a goner.
She kept clutching his shoulders to pull him away yet consume him. He was relentless. He couldn't stop biting and sucking her lips.
"Sana..what do you do to me?" he panted on top of her lips as he finally moved away. Her lips were so numb and red at this point.
"I..I wanna do so much... I want to...fuckk" he rasped as he grabbed her chin between his fingers and pushed it up.
Sana gasped as he started peppering loud kisses below her chin and on her entire neck. Sucking, biting and nibbling endlessly.
Before she knew, he clutched his teeth on her skin and bit her neck.
"Aaaahhh..S.." she quickly grabbed his back as he took the skin between his lips and sucked on to it softly.
Sana was so restless suddenly. The tingling, the stinging, the sensations, they were all returning between her legs. She tightly pressed her thighs together as he sucked her neck.
Sidharth knew her reservations right now. So despite his needy soul and body, he couldn't go beyond a certain point and that was driving him insane with need and frustration.
His hands slowly moved lower over her body, desperately grabbing her breast in his palm and giving a light squeeze.
Sana moaned loudly as his lips started moving lower on her neck, going towards her collarbone. Sana ws a mess but so was Sidharth.
His hand left her chest and he dragged his hand lower across her stomach and as soon as he pushed his hand inside her shirt, Sana gasped and held him tighter.
"Sii..dharth" she gasped his name as his fingers caressed her bare stomach.
Sidharth was losing his mind with every passing second and he knew he had to stop right now or else he wouldn't be able to. God, he didn't even want to.
The moment his fingers reached the waistband of her pajamas, his eyes widened and he came back to his senses right away. Her sounds were literally filling up the room and he could sense the panic and desperation in them.
"Fucking hell" he rasped as he slowly moved his face away from her collarbone and pulled his hand out of her shirt, moving back a little.
Sana instantly opened her eyes to look at him. He seemed so conflicted, so anxious and maybe angry. Shit.
"I....relax.. you're okay. I'll just be back.." he mumbled.
She could sense the restlessness in his voice. she immediately grabbed him by the shoulders, trying to hold him there.
"Sidharth...I....aap" she whispered.
"Shhh.. I'm okay..bas abhi aaya. Gimme five minutes. I'll be back okay?" he spoke softly, despite the storm inside him.
Before she could respond, he bent and smacked a loud kiss to her red lips and moved back. He ran a hand through his hair as he quickly moved away from her and got out of the bed.
Sana's eyes were fixed on him and she knew something was bothering him and he was restless. She had an idea of what it was.
She wanted to stop him, say something, call him back, but she was so nervous herself. She saw him walk towards the washroom and close the door.
She sighed loudly and rubbed her chest as soon as he slammed the door shut. The tingling sensation was still there between her legs and she pressed her palm between her legs to get rid of it.
He had kissed and marked her so passionately that she was still feeling his lips and teeth all over her neck and on her lips. Her neck was literally burning and stinging.
Sidharth splashed cold water all over his face as soon as he stepped inside the washroom. he was so fucking needy for her, she had no idea.
Everything that she just told him, it just heightened his need and desire for her a thousand times more. It was crazy honestly. He wanted to devour her.
He harshly rubbed his hands all over his face and then brushed his wet fingers through his hair, pushing them back. He honestly wanted to go and stand under the cold shower because he felt like his entire body was literally burning and aching for her. it really was.
So he did just that. He removed his clothes and went under the cold shower, letting it calm his burning body down.
"Dammiitt" he slammed his fist on the wall behind.
He came out of the bathroom a few minutes later, shower and changed in to fresh clothes while Sana still lay in bed, cuddled up in his pillow, needy and anxious for him.
The moment the door opened, her eyes widened and she quickly turned around to look at him. all the woody musky scents that suddenly hit her told her that he had showered. Her eyes widened on their own as she took him in.
He was changed in to a fresh pair of shorts and a blue t-shirt. His hair was wet and slicked back making him look a hundred times hotter and intense.
The slight beard on his face and his dark deep eyes, were literally burning Sana up.
She wordlessly extended her hand out of the bed for him to take it as he walked towards her.
Sidharth slowly grabbed her hand as he stepped back on the bed.
"Aap..kahan chale gaye they...aap..theek ho?" she asked him in a small and concerned voice.
He nodded wordlessly as he moved closer to her on the bed, taking his pillow out of her hands and throwing it away as he snuggled closer to her body.
"Aap...Sidharth...agar aap...kuch karna chahte ho...tou aap..kar sakte ho...you don't have to sto.."
"Shhhh" he shushed her up by placing his index finger on her lips.
"Nahi baba. I'm okay. I want to, but not right now, not like this. I'm okay, pakka. Theek hai?" he spoke softly looking in to her eyes.
She couldn't talk so she slowly nodded her head at him making him smile softly. He bent and placed a sweet kiss to her forehead.
"Theek hai tu? Was I...too harsh?" he asked her.
She shook her head making his smile grow wider.
"Aaj aise hi reh sara din...sirf ishaaro se bata mujhe sab kuch" he teased her, still not removing his finger.
"Mmmm" she groaned and quickly opened her lips and bit his finger.
Sidharth's eyes widened as a small wince left his lips.
His eyes grew darker at what she just did.
Sana's cheeks turned red at the realization and she slowly left his finger, removing het teeth.
"Relax" he put her at ease as he sweetly tucked her hair behind her ear and pressed a soft kiss to her chin.
"Chal..ab jaldi se uth aur freshen up. Then we'll go and have some breakfast. Uske baad, we're going somewhere beautiful. You'll love it" he smiled.
He saw how her face relaxed and lit up hearing that.
"Kahan?" she asked curiously.
He kept looking at her and gave her a warm smile as his fingers lightly caressed her face.
The way her eyes slightly lit up and sparkled, the way she asked him of where he was taking her, it reminded him of his old Sana, who knew was inside her, she just needed some love and she would be back.
He would make sure of it. his smile grew wider as her eyes kept narrowing while staring him as she waited for his answer.
"We're going to the Ceking Rice Terrace. It's a beautiful, lush green scenic spot in Bali with jungle swings, scenic terraces, rice paddies and a lot of nature, beauty, and peace. I thought you might like it there" he explained softly.
Sana's heart was beating so much for this man.
How did he always think of such small little details to make sure she feels comfortable, and at peace. She just gave him a soft smile and nodded.
"I'm sure I will. Aap le kar jaa rahay ho na? Tou aap jo bhi mere liye chunte ho wo kabhi ghalat ho hi nahi sakta naa" she told him softly but with so much conviction, he lost his mind.
This. This unwavering trust she has in him, this pedestal she puts him on, it was crazy.
"Meri jaan. Chal, get up get up get up" he told her as he grabbed her hand and tugged at it, pulling her up.
She slowly sat up and before leaving the bed, she did something she was aching to do.
He was looking so tempting, so delicious, so irresistible, but then, when did he not.
She was sitting cross legged like a little baby, her doe eyes boring in to his face.
She leapt forward towards him and wrapped her hands around his nape and hugged him. She rested her chin on his shoulder as she clutched him closer with her hands and sniffed his delicious scent in.
Sidharth softly smiled and brought his own hands behind her small back, holding her in place.
"Kya hua?" he asked her with a soft, knowing smile on his lips.
"Mhmm. Bas. Hug karna tha" she mumbled on his shoulder.
She then pressed a small kiss to his shoulder as she lifted her chin from there and moved back the slightest bit, taking her fingers in his hair and pressing her lips right below his ear.
She gave him a soft but long kiss there, not wanting to remove her lips. Sidharth closed his eyes as he sucked in a breath and held her tighter.
Little did she know what she was doing to his already aching heart and body.
"I love you so much. You're the hottest man to ever exist. My Sidharth" she whispered right on top of his neck, just where she had kissed him.
Her hot breath falling on his skin and tingling it.
"Sana..baba kya.."
She pressed another kiss just there before he could complete his sentence.
"Shhhh. Mujhe pyaar karne do please" she said in such a sweet way, his heart melted right there.
He smiled as he held her close to his chest while she tortured him.
She kept peppering sweet soft kisses all around his jaw and right below it, wherever her lips could reach while he sat there patiently, softly rubbing her back.
She finally moved back and brought her fingers out of his hair and cupped his cheek.
"Thank you. Mera honay k liye" she whispered looking in to his eyes.
His dark eyes were so taken by her. He felt like she woke up with an intention to render him absolutely speechless and powerless today.
"Shhh. Meri jaan hai tu" he smiled and placed a chaste kiss to her sweet red lips.
Sana was so in love with him. It seemed like she was just not interested in doing anything else but love him, and be around him.
She again wrapped both her hands loosely around his nape and tilted her head to the other side slightly as she stared at his face like a love struck fool.
Sidharth's eyes narrowed as he gave her an amusing smile.
"Kyaa?" he asked.
"Kuch nahiii. Bass" she smiled, still staring at him the same way.
Her gaze held so much love and so much reverence for him, it was tingling his entire soul.
He was almost getting overwhelmed and nervous now.
"Aaj aise hi rehna hai kya?" he smiled, cupping her face sweetly.
She nodded.
He smiled wider.
"Pagal. Chal. Seedha kar sar. Aisay gardan dukhe gi baba. Come" he tried straightening her face.
Sana wanted to cry.
Even in the smallest moments, in the most random things, he still cared for her. He still thought about her comfort and ease in every little thing.
She let him straighten her face back before he came closer and gave her a sweet kiss on her jaw.
"You're so fucking precious. I don't want to let you leave either par we have to. I wanna show you around. You'll love it where we're going.
Aaja" he smiled as she finally removed her hands from behind his neck and finally got off the bed as he helped her.
Sana finally felt a little glimmer of excitement run through her as she went towards her luggage.
She wanted to dress up for him, she wanted to look good for him, she wanted to enjoy with him, she wanted to find her peace with him again. She wanted to move on from everything that had happened.
She just wanted to give herself to him and let him take care of her and heal her, like he always did.
She slowly sat down cross legged on the floor as she opened the suitcase and rummaged through her clothes. Sidharth was now lying down on the bed, with his head resting against the head rest while his eyes were fixed on his beautiful girl.
One of his hand was resting behind his head and the other laid across his stomach. Only if she knew all the things he wanted to do to her, how badly and how desperately he was trying to control himself and go easy so that he doesn't overwhelm or scare her.
"Sidharthh?" her loud voice broke his chain of thoughts.
He slowly blinked and came back to her voice as he looked at her.
Her head was turned back and she was staring at him with a confused look on her face.
"K..kya hua?" he mumbled distractedly.
"Aap theek ho na? Kya soch rahay they? Kahan khoye huay they? Mai kab se awaaz de rahi thi" she asked him softly.
He blinked again and straightened on the bed.
"I'm okay baba. Kuch nahi soch raha tha, bas wese hi. I'm perfect. Tu bata, kya keh rahi thi?"
"Main..bas ye pooch rhi thi..k wo kesi jaga hai? Mai kya pehnu? Kese kapray? Wahan..kya hoga?" she asked him innocently.
He looked at her and took her face in. Her big doe eyes were full of innocence and his heart thudded wildly with the way she always asked him everything with such innocence and like she only always needed his answers. He wanted to go and kiss her so bad.
He gulped softly.
"Kuch bhi pehan le baba. Everything that you wear is beautiful. It's a garden, thora windy ho sakta hai wahan and it's mostly a quiet place. So jo tera dil karay tu wo pehan. You'll look the most beautiful girl anyways" he gave her a soft smile, melting her entire soul.
She gave him a small smile and nodded. She finally turned her head back and took out a white dress.
It was a white lacy knee length and off shoulder, body hugging dress and it seemed like the most perfect choice for now.
She grabbed the dress and her undergarments in her hands as she quickly stood up and ran towards the washroom closing the door behind her.
"Sidhaaarth mai tyaaar.." she stopped midway as soon as she walked outside in the room.
Sana had taken a quick shower and had changed in to the dress inside the bathroom and when she walked out, her breath hitched as soon as her eyes fell on him.
Sidharth too was changed into a black button down shirt and beige cargo pants. His hair was set back and he couldn't look more dapper. Sana could feel her insides melting.
As soon as he heard her voice, he looked up from his phone and when he did, his eyes instantly darkened and widened as he took her in. She looked beyond sexy.
The dress was hugging her body to perfection and also accentuating her perfect curves. Her bare shoulders were driving him insane with need. Every little part of her body that was bare to his eyes was driving him absolutely crazy with desire.
He wanted to mark every corner of her bare body. Her hair were slightly damp and wavy from the ends, cascading down her back. And her beautiful face. Bare of any makeup yet the most beautiful.
He kept his phone aside and stood up, giving her another complete look over. He slowly walked towards her.
"How are you so perfect Sana?" he rasped as he walked closer towards her.
Her heart was in her mouth with anticipation. His dark intense gaze and demeanor reminded him of the initial days of knowing him and of the day she had met him in the supermarket for the first time ever.
He had the same eyes and demeanor that night too. It intimidated her yet drew her to him.
"I...I...you are so perfect..Sidharth" she mumbled back, not able to meet his eyes.
He finally came and stood right in front of her, their faces just a few centimeters apart. He could hear the thumping of her beautiful heart.
"What happened?" he asked her in a low voice.
"Aaap..mujhe..bilkul..wo pehle din walay S..Sidharth ki yaad dila rahay ho" she confessed nervously.
His brows furrowed slightly as he gave her a small smile.
"Pehle din wala? Wo kyun aur kese?" he asked her in a lighter tone.
She slowly lifted her eyesup to look at him and blinked softly.
"Matlab..apka demeanor..itna intense aur serious lag raha hai..bilkul jese uss raat supermarket mai laga tha..tab bhi aise hi dekh rahay they jese..abhi dekh rahay ho" she whispered.
He wanted to kiss the life out of her.
"Kese? Jese k I want to kiss those perfect lips so bad?" he rasped eyeing her lips.
She wet them unknowingly at that.
"Tab..ap..tab aap mujhe kiss karna chahte they?" she asked him sweetly.
"When do I not want to Sana? You are so perfect, so beautiful. I want to kiss you all the fucking time. That night, I may not have confessed it to myself for a very long time but that night, I couldn't stop staring at your perfect mouth and all I wanted to do was place my lips right here" he confessed placing his index finger on her lips.
She almost shivered.
"Tou...ab kar lo" she whispered.
"Fuck.. Come here" he harshly pulled her closer and slammed his lips on top of hers, sucking her perfect lips softly.
He nibbled at them so softly and passionately, she felt like she would melt in his arms.
She grabbed him by his elbows as he kissed her to his heart's content, he licked her lips one final time before letting go. He was lightly panting on top of her wet lips. His eyes flickered to hers and he sweetly wiped her lips with his palm.
"My sweet girl" he gave her a warm smile.
"Chale?" he asked her as he extended his hand towards her.
She looked down at his open palm and then at his face, giving him a small smile and nod. She put her own fingers in his hand and wrapped them around his thick fingers. He tugged at his hand, pulling her along.
"Sidharth? Par..hum wahan jayenge kese?" she asked him as he walked them outside their room.
"We'll take the taxi baba, I've already called it. Bahir hai" he explained to her as he locked the room.
She nodded as she wrapped her hands around his bicep and leaned in to his side while he wrapped his own hand around her waist.
The taxi was waiting outside their hotel as they stepped out. He was so excited to take her there. it was going to be beautiful. And he couldn't wait for her to see and experience the beauty that this place was.
"Let's go baby" he smiled wider as he opened the door of the cab for her to step in. she did, but not before giving him the sweetest smile ever.
Once they settled in the cab, Sana quietly inched closer to him and unclasped his hands and entwined her own fingers with his, keeping their entwined hands on his thigh. He looked at their hands and gave her a smile.
"Jab aajaye mujhe bata dena..mujhe tab tak yahan rehna hai" she whispered softly as she kept her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes.
He smiled and pressed a quick kiss to her head.
"Arey? Aise kyun? Aankhe tou khol. Look outside. Enjoy the views. Come on" he nudged her.
"Mmmm" she resisted, snuggling into him.
"Tch babaa, itni khoobsurat jaga hai, thora enjoy tou kar. Aankhe kyun band kar k beth gayi hai" he asked.
"Kyunki mere liye sab se khoobsurat jaga yahi hai" she nudged his chest with her finger.
"Mai aapke sath ..apke paas aise aramse , kisi fikar aur darr k bethi hoon..mere liye wo sab se zada khoobsurat baat, feeling aur view hai Sidharth. I want to take this in" she confessed.
His heart broke and also healed at the same time. She was so perfect and precious.
"Mera bacha. Idhar ayega?" he kissed her head and suddenly pulled her more into his side.
"Kya..aap"
Before she could ask, he pulled her completely on his thigh making her gasp loudly and look at the driver. Her cheeks instantly heated as he settled her on top of his thigh and held her ny her back.
"Sidh.." she whispered shyly.
Before she could complete, he pressed a soft kiss to her jaw. She closed her eyes tightly.
"Shhhh. You're here. Just enjoy the view now" he rasped as he pulled her closer to his chest and kissed her neck softly.
Sana was shivering in his hold but she finally wrapped her own hand around his neck and looked outside the window. It truly was surreal. So green, so peaceful, so beautiful.
********
Sidharth's heart was literally in his mouth with excitement. He was so excited to show her the place and he was really hoping she would love it. It was beautiful. It was one of the most beautiful and scenic spots in Bali.
"We're here sweetheart. Aaja, let's go" he said as the cab stopped.
Since she was in his lap, she tried getting off awkwardly before the taxi driver could turn around and look but since they sat in an enclosed space in the car, it was getting pretty difficult for her.
"Relax. Let me" he whispered as she kept moving herself in every direction, trying to get off.
She instantly stopped and gave him a small nod.
He slowly opened the door of the cab and told her to get off.
"Aaja, careful" he helped her off the car.
Sana finally put her weight on his thighs with her hands as she moved forward and got off his lap and out the cab.
He too followed and took some cash out from his wallet while Sana looked around. It seemed like some garden that they were visiting. There was a huge gate in front of where their cab stopped. All she could see was greenery everywhere.
"Thanks Man" Sidharth said to the driver, he was probably an American.
"My pleasure Sir & Ma'am. Have a good day" the guy said before sitting back in his car and leaving.
"Ready?" he came closer to Sana and softly grabbed her free hand, holding it in his securely.
She gave him a nod.
"Ye..kya"
"Shh..abhi khudi dekh lena. Let's go inside" he gave her a charming smile.
They walked towards the entrance hand in hand. Sana's eyes were constantly wandering everywhere around her. There was so much beauty, serenity and calmness all around. His eyes and his entire focus was on her.
He couldn't wait to take her inside.
Sidharth took out some cash and paid the fee at the entrance while Sana just stood next to him, completely clueless while he took care of everything like always.
Sana was quietly observing him and her heart was beating a little faster for him. He was just so perfect in everything he did. In the smallest of things to the biggest of things. From taking care of her like a baby, knowing every little thing here & taking care of it so perfectly to flying a plane.
He was perfect in everything he did. She was so lucky to have him because he truly did take care of her like a child, a baby.
She was on this trip with him and yet, she was absolutely clueless about everything happening here because he was here, doing it all.
He planned it, he took care of everything, he knew what they were doing, where they were going, what the language is, what the currency is, the protocols for everything, he did it all so perfectly like he was some native.
Truth was, this was exactly the kind of man and relationship she always lacked in her life and the one she needed the most.
This stability that he gave her and her life, it was something she never had. This safety, this comfort, the way he took care of every small thing in her life like a parental figure or nurturer, a guide, a mentor, this is what her life needed.
He truly did take her as his baby who he just knew he had to nurture and provide for. He made sure to not let her get worried about these technical things in life because he was there to take care of those.
He was not just the man she loved, he was everything to her. Everything.
She almost teared up at the realization and unknowingly grabbed his hand tighter and leaned closer in to his side as he bought the tickets and sorted the money.
She pressed her sel in to his side catching his attention.
He swiftly turned his face towards her and raised his eyebrows slightly.
"Kya hua?" he whispered softly.
She was just so emotional right now that even the smallest of things that he was doing was making her heart flutter & making the realization stronger and stronger of what he was to her.
Like the way he asked her what was wrong just now, even that tone and question held so much warmth to it. Like someone who's elder to you, who's seen the world and who takes you like a child and who's there for you asks you.
She pursed her lips together and slowly shook her head. He just gave her a small smile.
"Come" he gave a squeeze to her hand as they finally walked towards the entrance.
The gate soon opened for them and the moment they stepped inside and Sana looked ahead, a loud gasp left her mouth making him smile wide.
"OMG" she gasped loudly as she halted right there.
It was really beyond any and everything she had ever seen. Till wherever her eyes went, all she saw was lush green and inexplicable beauty.
"Sidharth..this...ye...I mean"
He smiled wider at that. That was exactly what he was waiting and hoping for.
"Beautiful isn't it?" he smiled looking down at her amused face.
"Beautiful? I mean...ye...itna khoobsurat...itna grand..ye...can we see it all?" she asked in such wonderment.
"Of course we can my love. Let's go inside" he smiled as he took her inside.
The place was filled with lush green valleys of rice, jungle swings, different valleys at different levels, some steeper than the others. There were terraces for an even better view. The best part was the calm and quiet.
Sidharth had done his research before coming and so he made sure that they visit around this time since the rush starts at around late afternoon and around sunset.
They walked around the rice paddies, looking at everything while he showed her around and explained to her what this place really was.
"Wo dekh..wahan par..do you see that?" he pointed in a certain direction.
"These are all their rice fields basically and one of Bali's largest irrigation spot. And those mountains that this place is cut from? Unki water streams basically provide water for these rice fields and irrigate them. Yahan pe inke farmers ne apni apni fields aur rice lagaya hota hai which they water all throughout the year and then jab time hota hai so they get rice from these fields. Since it's so beautifully made and so lush green, it's a tourist spot for people visiting Bali par asal mai hai ye inki rice fields" he explained her.
She was so in awe of the place and it's beauty and of him for knowing it all and for explaining everything to her so patiently and so perfectly.
"It...wow..it really is so beautiful Sidharth...so so beautiful.. I mean mujhe tou ye koi sapne jesa lag raha hai k hums ach mai itni green aur itni khoobsurat jaga par hain..matlab..mene ye sab hamesha pinterest aur pictuires mai hi dekha hai...I can't believe you actually brought me to a place like this...itna pyaara.. thank you" she spoke in awe.
He smiled at his beautiful baby. She was such a sweetheart.
He quickly left her hand and wrapped his hand around her shoulders, pulling her in to his side and placing a long kiss to the side of her head.
"Shhh..no thank yous. Bas tujhe acha laga, tu enjoy kar rahi hai, mere liye wohi sab kuch hai" he told her.
"Wo...wo kya hai Sidharth? Aaao naa wahan chalte hain" she pointed further away from where they stood.
He narrowed his eyes slightly and then smiled.
"Another fascination here. The jungle swings and zip lines. Come, lemme show you" he told her as they walked further.
"Acha okay now I need you to climb very very carefully and don't leave my hand. It's quite steep aur thora slippery bhi ho sakta hai. Okay?" he instructed her seriously as he grabbed her tightly while they climbed th few steps to go up.
Sana was so excited. She had never really been to some place like this and that too with him, it made it all the more special.
He slowly held her waist from both sides as he heled her climb up while he stayed behind.
"Haan..careful..araam se" he helped her up making sure she was okay.
Once she went up, he followed behind.
"Wo dekh" he smiled as he sweetly grabbed her shoulders and turned her around.
Her eyes widened as she gasped.
There was a large swing hanging between the trees.
"Wowww.. Sidharth...ye..kya hum le sakte hain?" she asked.
"This is so beautiful....it looks unreal" she mumbled.
He was so in love with her in that moment. There was an inexplicable beauty, calmness and love in that moment and in that place. It was just the two of them, surrounded by nature and it's grandeur, there was this constant cool breeze blowing and her white dress hugging her body so perfectly, she looked like an actual angel standing in the middle of nature, sent from the heavens.
He walked closer behind her and slowly wrapped his hands around her stomach, and pulling her back in to his body.
He rested his chin on her bare shoulder, making her shiver in his hold. She felt like an actual current passed through her body.
"Kya hua...you okay? Are you cold?" he rasped, holding her stomach even tighter.
"Naahi...I'm okay." She barely whispered as she brought her own hands resting them on top of his.
Sidharth gave a soft smile at that tone and before she knew, he lifted his chin and pressed his lips on her bare shoulders.
Sana's eyes shut on their own and her lips parted. It was suddenly getting harder to breathe.
It was so surreal. They were literally standing in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by nature and greenery and under the beautiful blue sky. Just them.
Sidharth didn't stop. He kept kissing her shoulder blade, slowly going up towards her neck.
Sana tilted her head to the other side on her own, giving him free access. He sweetly took her skin between his teeth, nibbling softly. Sana winced lightly making him lose his mind.
He slowly took the skin in between his lips and sucked softly. A low whimper left her lips as goosebumps sprouted all over her exposed arms and legs.
"You look like an angel right now. my personal angel" he whispered huskily as he left her skin and started peppering wet kisses all over her neck and going up to her jaw.
Before Sana could gather herself any further, she didn't realize when his hands left her stomach and started travelling up.
They grabbed her chest perfectly making her moan and drop her head back on his shoulder. Her nails were digging in to his hands.
Due to the thin material of the dress, he could feel her peaks so perfectly, it almost felt like he was touching them without any barriers in between. He groaned as he squeezed harder and his lips tortured her neck.
"Sid...aarth..oh God...Main" she panted as she felt like she'd pass out with all the sensations.
"Do you wanna go take..the swing?" he rasped between his kisses and his torture.
Sana frowened.
"K..Kya" she mumbled.
He finally slowed his kisses down and started loosening his hold on her chest.
"Tu ne jaana hai uss pe?" he asked her in a thick voice before pressing a long kiss to her jaw and lifting his face up.
"Main...can I? Aap bhi aao ge?" she whispered.
He smiled and finally removed his hands from her chest and brought them down, back on her stomach.
"Tujhe karna hai na? I want you to go take it baba.. tujhe pata hai I don't enjoy these things par I want you to go do it alone. You like it, you want to, so you go. Main yahin hoon na, tere saath, main doonga na tujhe jhoola. Tu karegi?" he asked her sweetly.
She was so confused. She really wanted to. Her eyes kept flickering to the large swing and back at him.
He came forward and sweetly cupped her cheek, rubbing it lightly.
"Kya hogaya baba? Karna hai na? Main aaun sath?" he smiled.
"Mujhe..karna hai...akele" she answered in a small voice.
His heart fluttered. Finally. This is what he was hoping for. For her to take an initiative on her own, do something that she likes doing or that she enjoys. He wanted her to come back to life by doing these little things that made her happy.
"Perfect. Aajaa" he smiled as he took her towards the swing and very carefully made her sit on it.
"Just hold the strings tightly, okay? Main yahin hoon peeche. Just close your eyes, feel the peace, feel the wind that hits your face and just let everything else go baby. Be in this moment, feel it, enjoy it. Okay?" he told her sweetly.
Sana wanted to cry and just hug the life out of him. She nodded. She did as told and tightly gripped the strings from each side, settling herself properly. Her heart was literally thumping in her ears.
He slowly walked and stood behind her grabbing the strings of the swing from each side.
"Ready?" he asked her in a small voice.
She silently nodded her head making him smile. He came closer and pressed a kiss to the back of her head before moving back.
"Enjoyy" he told her as he swiftly pulled the swing back towards himself and before she knew he left it slowly after a brief pause, giving her a swing.
Sana's eyes widened and small gasp left her lips as the feeling of pure ecstasy and exhilaration filled her heart and soul.
The cold wind hit her entire body as he swung her back and forth, maintain a perfect rhythm. She slowly closed her eyes and did what he told her to do.
She thought of everything that has happened until now, all the great things that have happened to her since she met him, she thought of his perfect smiling face, the face she saw that night in the supermarket, his lips, his muscular strong body, she thought of the way he loves her.
She just thought of her perfect Sidharth even though he was standing right behind her swinging her.
She thought of everything her family did to her and she unknowingly shivered, gripping the swing tighter. She then remembered how he came there for her, how he stood for her, how he fought them all for her, how he held her and brought her back.
She thought of their love making after she came back from Punjab and she unknowingly clenched her thoughts together.
The cold wind, the feeling of swinging in the air, the calmness of the place, and her perfect Sidharth behind her, it was all driving her insane with a million feelings and emotions.
Sidharth's heart was so happy after so many days. Seeing her finally let herself go even if it was a little bit meant so much to him. Her enjoying like this, it was all he had hoped for.
He slowly left the strings of the swing and stepped back, taking his phone out from his pocket. He wanted to capture this angel in front of him.
His eyes were constantly crinkling because of how fully he was smiling seeing her. he clicked a few pictures of her from behind without letting her know.
He just wanted her to be in the moment and enjoy. She had closed her eyes and thrown her head back as she swung.
His heart was beating so wildly for this woman.
He wanted to give her the entire universe. Put it at her feet and it would still be less. She was an angel. She was the epitome of perfection. He wanted to do so much for and to her in that moment. He wanted to lay his entire life for her.
"Sana.. will you look at me?" he took her name with such conviction, it jolted her back from her thoughts.
She could sense the command and love in his tone. She slowly opened her eyes, straightened her head and slowly turned her head back while swinging, giving him the sweetest smile.
Just then, he clicked a million pictures of her.
Sana wasn't expecting that. Her eyes automatically lit up and her lips curved up as soon as she had turned her head back to look at him while she swung and just then, he captured that moment forever.
"So perfect. Beautiful" he mumbled as he looked at her from across the phone.
She no longer wanted to swing. She no longer wanted to be away from him. She just wanted to be in his arms right that second.
"Bass...mujhe...wahan aana hai" she told him softly.
He kept his phone back in his pocket as he quickly moved closer towards the swing and the moment it came back, he grabbed the strings from each side slowing it down.
He slowly stopped the swing and once he did, she felt like she was back from heaven. Her face, her entire body was ice cold because of the cold wind. Sana slowly stood up from the swing and walked towards him. She was about to run but he stopped her instantly.
"Areyyyy careful baba" he quickly showed her his hand trying to stop her.
She still rushed towards him and before he knew, she clung to him, wrapping her hands around his neck and lifting herself up from the ground, hugging his body.
"It was...so perfect Sidharth...so perfect...thank you for being my Sidharth...main...aap se itna pyaar karti hoon...jitna shayd mai kabhi, kabhi samjha aur samajh nahi paungi...aap meri jaan ho" she was slightly out of breath as she whispered it all in his ears, her warm breath tickling his skin.
He had wrapped his own hands around her back, holding her in place.
She wanted to let him know how much she loved him. She suddenly felt so desperate to tell him how much she loved him, she didn't even want to wait another minute. She felt like she just had to get it out of her system.
"Come here...give me a kiss" he whispered as he tried pulling her back.
She wanted nothing more. She quickly moved back and grabbed his face in both her hands, slowly meeting his dark eyes.
Her beautiful brown eyes flickered slowly from his nose to his lips and she sweetly pressed her lips on his. She took his lips in hers and sucked softly while he made sure to hold her closely.
They kissed with such softness and such calmness, it was beautiful. It was such a surreal moment. They stood in the middle of nature, surrounded by trees, greenery, and beauty, pouring their souls in to each other.
As soon as they parted, Sana tightly gripped his face, trying to get as close to him as possible. He sensed that urgency. He knew her heart was restless for him.
He knew she was thinking of everything that happened in Punjab. He sweetly put her down on the ground, still holding her closely as he filled her face with kisses, calming her down.
"You're my perfect angel. And you're here. Never letting you go" he assured her looking deeply in her eyes before pressing a chaste kiss to her lips.
Sana and Sidharth spent a good few hours just sitting silently on the grass, their legs swinging down as they sat on the edge of one of the peaks, overlooking the beauty this place was.
He had wrapped his hand around her and she laid her head between his neck and shoulder, occasionally pressing sweet kisses to his neck and his ear.
Their hands were entwined and he was constantly rubbing the pads of his fingers to her bare arms.
They didn't even know how much time had passed. They were relishing the moment and enjoying the peace this place was giving them. They needed it so bad.
She knew what she wanted to do. It was time. She wanted to.
"Sidharth?" she whispered his name with such softness and delicacy.
"Hmmm" he smiled.
"Aap..ko pata hai..main..khana kyun nahi khaati ..jab se waapis aayi hoon?" she mumbled softly.
His breath hitched as his eyes widened. Fuck. He wasn't ready for that. As much as he wanted her to let it all out, he didn't know if he was really ready to listen.
He wordlessly sucked in a breath and pulled her closer in to his side, resting his own head on top of hers.
She remained quiet for a few minutes. She was gathering herself and her thoughts, trying to find her composure before laying it out in front of him.
"Wo..mu...mujhe...jese khanan dete they...itne din..mujhe acha nahi lagta tha Sidharth...wo..acha treat nahi karte they naa...khaana bhi...ache senahi dete they..mu...mujhe khana dekh kar ulti aati thi...nahi mann karta tha kuch khane ka, ya khane ko dekhne ka bhi..sirf aap chahiye they..khana ya aur kuch nahi.. iss liye ab mujhe..khana dekhte hi wo sab yaad ajata hai...mai kya karu?" she asked him in a small voice, trying her best to not break down.
She knew it would further break him.
Fuck. His heart sank. He didn't realize when his vision blurred and his eyes stung with painful tears.
He wanted to cry so bad. He was speechless. He didn't have it in him to say anything.
"Sana..meri jaaan...I.." his voice cracked as he lifted his head and looked at her, cupping her chin.
"I..." he pursed his lips together as she saw his red eyes.
She immediately shook her head at him and wiped his eyes with her fingers.
"Yahan aao" she whispered.
She sweetly pulled his face down and pressed kisses to his eyes one by one.
"I love you" she told him as she looked deeply in his eyes.
He wanted to scream.
"Mai..theek hoon...aapke paas hoon na...aap mujhe theek kar rahay ho.. I love you so much" she couldn't stop saying it.
He was tongue tied. His heart was suddenly so heavy. He was just staring in to her soul with his deep eyes.
She brought her face closer and pressed a few kisses to his chin, lightly caressing it with her fingers.
"Mujhe...wapis hotel le k chalo ge? I feel.. cold. I want to go back, lie down in bed, on top of you and bas aapka pyaar chahiye" she demanded softly.
She was being so soft with him right now. despite her own pain and trauma, she knew he needed her more right now. She knew how insanely he loved her and hearing what she went through and especially regarding food, she knew he couldn't take it so she was being the stronger one right now.
He was just looking at her with so much love, so much helplessness.
"Please..I'm okay" she told him before pressing her lips softly on his.
She didn't kiss him, she just softly took his lower lip in her mouth, sucked it just slightly and let go.
"Sana...please..main..kya karu.. dard ho raha hai" he whispered in his slightly cracked voice, breaking her heart in to a million pieces.
She knew every single thing that was racing through his mind right now. the pain, the anger, the blame, the guilt, she knew it all.
She harshly grabbed his face and pulled it closer, their noses touching one another.
"Shhhhh.. mere guddu ho na? Main theek hoon...pakka..bas I want you...just take me back and love me.. please" she whispered on top of his lips.
He looked at her eyes then back at her red lips.
He softly pressed a kiss to her lips.
"Mera bacha" he whispered as he grabbed her face lovingly and hugged her to himself.
He kept ruffling her hair with his fingers as he closed his eyes and tried calming himself down.
"Main theek hoon...thank you for bringing me here..it was beyond perfection..you are beyond perfection Sidharth. I love you more than love itself" she whispered as she rubbed his back with her small fingers.
He slowly moved back and peppered her cheeks with kisses.
"Let's go" he told her quietly as he lifted himself up and then gave her a hand.
He carefully pulled her up and the moment he did, he pressed a kiss to her chin.
"Chale?" he asked her.
She gave him a small nod and a smile.
********
The ride back to their hotel was a rather quiet one. Sidharth was leaned back on the seat with his head resting against the seat while Sana was completely leaned in to his side with her hand resting on his thigh and her face between his neck and shoulder.
Their hears were at peace and so calm but his was aching a bit too much. Her saying it out loud made it all the more real. And he didn't know how to react to it or what to do to make it better.
All he knew right now was that his Sana was back in his arms and he was not letting her go ever now.
She said she needed his love so he was give just that to her. He was going to lay his entire being out in front of her. He would give her the whole universe. His perfect little girl.
He pressed a kiss to her head.
"My sweet baby".
They were going to be okay.