Thikaana

Thirty Three

Sidharth was lost deep in thought while he drove to his mother's place. His fingers constantly tapped the steering and his other elbow rested on the window. His mind, heart, body and soul all throbbed for that girl. She was driving him insane with everything that she was and especially the way she had started to express her love for him, with such honest, raw real and innocent emotions, letting him know how much he meant to her, how much she valued him, her constant demands of being loved and held by him, they were overpowering him. His heart was still aching and worried seeing her state since the past day. Seeing her breakdown like that, and put so much strain on herself, it was messing with his head. He wanted to protect her and keep her all safe and cuddled up in his arms and just not let her leave. He finally reached his mother's place and sighed loudly running a hand in his hair before getting out.
"Areyy Agaya mera bacha. Kesa haii?" his mother greeted him as soon as she opened the door, hugging his entire body.
"I'm good, aap batao, how have you been?" he hugged her back, placing a sweet kiss to her cheek and walking inside after closing the door behind them.
They went and sat inside and his mother asked all about his trip since he was one for so many days.
'I missed you bacha. Sab theek raha na wahan par? How was it?" she asked him softly caressing his hair.
"Haan haan it was all fine. The usual. Aap batao, peeche se sab theek raha, tabiat and all?"
"Haan my love, everything was perfectly fine. Bilkul theek rahi mai aur sab kuch" she smiled at him. He smiled back, nodding.
"Yaar ye Meena ko zara bola chaaye ka" he said running his hand in his hair.
"Haan haan. Meeeena zara chaaye bana de bhaiya k liye achi si aur nashte ka samaan bhi le ana sath"
"Aur bata, Preeti se baat hui teri? Bata rahi thi kal k wahan Milan se hui thi tujhse baat?" his mother asked. Sidharth seemed calmer, but slightly lost she realized. She knew it was to do with Sana. She was constantly wondering what the situation with these two was.
They got into a random conversation while Sidharth constantly kept checking his phone every few minutes. His mother was noticing but she decided to not say anything. They kept talking about random things and when she realized that he wasn't going to say anything but she could tell that he wanted to . There was this calmness to his face yet he seemed a bit on the edge. She had seen Sana's state while he was gone so she knew firsthand what that young girl had gone through while he was away. The tea arrived soon after and his mother started to serve him things and started making his tea. He out of nowhere blurt out
'Mom, She doesn't wanna marry Akshay" he instantly bit his thumb. His mother stopped right there and kept the kettle down, turning completely towards him. Her eyes wide with shock, surprise, and relief.
"Sidharth? Who, Sana? Did she say that to you?" her tone had  a mixture of shock and relief both and he could tell how her face had instantly lit up. He sighed and leaned his elbow back on the arm of the sofa.
"Tu mila kya usey anay k baad?"
"Haan I did. She came over kal. Bohat kuch hua but the point is k Mom, she doesn't wanna marry him. I mean bohat royi aur cheekhi wo kal mere sath. Sab kuch bol daala usne. She told me..that.." he visibly got a little nervous and ran his fingers in is hair pushing them back. 
His mother softly rubbed his bicep up and down calming him.
'Kya bola bachay?"
"She told me.. that she loves me" he released a shaky breath and looked at his mother unsure.
What he saw on his mother's face was not what he was expecting to see. Her face instantly lit up a thousand watts and her eyes genuinely smiled and she had this calm knowing smile.
'Whaaat? Kuch bolo ge?" he asked her getting a little flustered by her calmness.
"So bol dia usne aakhir" she smiled, confusing him all the more. He straightened up a little and turned completely towards her.
"Kya matlab? Kya bol rahay ho aap mom? What do you mean? You..you aren't shocked hearing this?" his shock however, was evident in his tone. His mother chuckled slightly.
"Shock kyun hongi when I already knew." She smiled at her extremely shocked and confused son. He just furrowed his eyebrows at her indicating her to speak more.
"Sidharth uss bachi ki halat kharab hogayi thi when you left for Milan. I have seen her cry for you, itni helpless thi wo bechari. My heart went out to that poor girl. Itni si hai abhi, par itni badi mushkil mai thi. She seemed so lost.. so broken, I could tell how desperately she needed you" his mother spoke as softly as she could, blowing Sidharth off completely. His posture immediately straightened and so did his expressions. He was suddenly all serious. This was not what he was expecting to hear in his wildest dreams. Yes, he did have an idea that Sana was missing him and that she was upset since they fought at his place but was it that bad? He kept staring at his mother like a lost child who really needed some words to soothe his racing restless heart. She slowly took her son's hand in his and softly rubbed the back of his hand and continued
"Haan Sidharth. Wo bachi bilkul toot gayi thi teri aur uski ladayi k baad. Uss din when I went to her place, she seemed so scared and so alone. Jese bas usko koi chahiye tha jo usko sun le, sh just needed someone to talk to. Aur jese hi we started talking, she broke down. Itna darr rahi thi wo tere ghusse se, itna lost thi, itna ladh rahi thi khud se. Ussi din I knew Sidharth, that it's much more than what she knows or thinks. Uss din jo besabri mene uski ankho mai dekhi tere liye, jis tarah se she was fighting herself for you, it made me realize that she too had gone very far in it. Aur uss din, mujhe ek alag hi relief mehssos hua. I saw it for myself and I knew, she will fight her way back. Wo bohat strong hai. She just needed someone who could give her that push and that guidance. Bohat pyaari hai wo Sidharth. Bachay jesi ek dam" his mother spoke lovingly.
Sidharth felt the air suddenly leaving his body and he suddenly started to feel clouded. It was all too much to take in and absorb. His heart was throbbing right in his ears and he wanted nothing more than her lips on his at that very moment. He felt a maddening desire for that girl. A desire that was not limited to any one particular aspect. He felt like his entire universe would stop without her. Whatever his mother was saying, felt like ice cold water being splashed on him.
"She too..matlab" he finally mumbled, still lost. His mother smiled at her little boy. He was still such a baby. She moved closer and lovingly caressed his face.
'She too matlab, I already know how deep you're in. Jaanti hoon bohat pyaar karne laga hai usey. I'm very happy meri jaan. She's worth all of it and more." She smiled. Sidharth felt like someone unched him right in the gut at that very point.
'Mom" he breathed.
"Haan meri jaan, I know. Tera pyaar dikhta hai teri inn pyaari ankho mai. The way you look at her, it says it all. And wo? Jese wo sirf tera naam hi leti hai na Sidharth, ussi se pata lag jata hai what you are to her. She keeps you on a pedestal" she smiled. Sidharth wanted to crush her in his arms. He needed her. He missed her. He didn't know what to say or how to react to any of it. He knew all of it somewhere deep down, but his mother giving him that reality check like that, it seemed like his entire universe collided and came together all at once.
"Mom, I don't know. Will she be able to get out of the engagement?" he finally voiced his biggest insecurity with the same fear in his eyes. She smiled at her little boy. Oh how he loved.
"Haan meri jaan. Jab you weren't here, I saw a different kind of rage inside her eyes Sidharth. Junooni thi wo tere liye. It felt like she would fight the world for you. I knew it, once she realizes, nothing will stop her."
"Mom, she..she spoke to her mother. She told her that she doesn't want to get married to Akshay" he spoke softly.
"Told you" she smiled. His mother's calmness with this whole thing was really putting him on the edge. How was she so sure?
"Par mom, she's young abhi. What if.. what if she realizes that she's making a mistake.. aur what if usko samajh ajaaye k it's actually Akshay who she needs, not me" his voice was barely audible and the restlessness in it, could be sensed. His mother sighed.
"Sidharth, dekh, it's not like she has just known Akshay, haina? Sari zindagi se jaanti hai usko. Agar uska apna hota tou kabhi tere sath aise close na hoti. Everything that she has lacked or wanted in life, usko wo sab tujhse mila hai, agar kuch kami hi na hoti, tou tujhse close hi na hoti na wo. Uske paas pehle hi wo sab hota jo usey chahiye tha. Aur tu khud mujhe bata, apne dil se pooch k, in all this time, has she ever made you feel that Akshay even exists in her lfie? I'm not at all tying to say this in a bad way beta, what I mean is k jab koi apki zindagi ka itna bara aur eham hissa hota hai na, tou usko koi daba nahi sakta. Uss ladki ko tu jab se mila hai, kya usne kabhi tujhe ye mehsoos honay dia? Uski har baat mai, uske har andaaz mai, uski ankho mai, uski har cheez mai mujhe sirf ek insaan dikhta hai.. and that's you my love. I've just met her a few times, par itni duniya dekhi hai k uss bachi k mann ko samajh saku. Saaf dikhta hai Sidharth" she smiled looking at him. He sat there lost. Everything his mother said, spoke to his soul. He knew she was right. Sana never made him feel that Akshay was her priority or that he held a place in her life. She kept letting him in since day one. Her eyes, her body, her heart, they were all submitting to him since the day he met her at that store. Her submission was clear as day in her beautiful eyes.
Sidharth felt himself getting overpowered by emotions. He suddenly bent forward and hugged his mother. He held her tightly.
"Mom, Sana.." he breathed shakily.
"You love her" she rubbed his back, smiling.
'Hmm" he pressed his face on her shoulder.
"Yes yes yes. Good choice"
"I love her too" his mother chuckled, placing a kiss to her son's cheek. He finally smiled, his gaze getting slightly watery.
"Tujhe pata hai Sidharth mai shuru mai bohat darr rahi thi iss sab se. I couldn't let you go through all of it again. Par uss bachi ko dekhne k baad, usey milne k baad, I realized, that this battle is worth fighting for" she smiled lovingly. He finally sighed shakily and pushed his hair back. His heart finally felt a lot at peace. His mother saying all that, telling him about how she was while he was gone, it meant everything to him. He wanted this girl with every fiber in his being. His heart finally felt at peace. He still had his own doubts, fears and insecurities but at least he now knew how hard he was ready to fight.
They sat there having their tea and talking when after a few minutes, his phone finally rang. It was the call he had been awaiting since morning. He sighed answering the call
'Haan sweetheart, ajaun?"
'Sidhaaaaarth ahaaaan" she whined from the other end. This girl was so stubborn.
"kya hogaya bacha?" he spoke standing up and moving to the side.
"Haaye siyaapa khana theek hi nahi ho raha sar ka dard. Itna bhaari hai na sar, aise jese kisi ne 10 kilo ka pathar bandha hua ho, sau lagge" she gasped. He wanted to laugh at that but his instant worry for her kicked in, angering him.
'Aur na maano baat. Jab tumhe bola tha k mat jao tou kyun gayi? Gadhi ho kya? Jab kuch keh raha hoon tou maan nahi sakti ek baar mai?" his nostrils flared. She sniffled slightly. He sighed. He wanted to kiss that pout away which he knew was there on her lips at that moment.
"Kya haaiii? Pyaar se baat karo. Theek nahi hoon mai. Aise mat daanto" she pouted. He rolled his eyes.
"Tou aur aise kaamo pe kya aarti utaaru?"
"Sidharth! Kya thappar khana hai? Theek se baat karo. Aur lene arahe ho tou chup chaap aao warna mai khud ajaungi. Bye" she cut the call without waiting for his response.
"Abey. Kya hai ye" he sighed staring at his phone screen. He turned around walking towards his mother.
"Mom, she's not really well. Kal madam itna cheekhi chilaayi hain k ab haalat kharab hui wi hai. She still went to the office. God, she's so stubborn at times." He complaint like a grumpy husband. His mother laughed out loud.
"Haan haan theek hai. Tu bhi kam thori hai. Chal jaa, pick her up from the office. And Sidharth? Be nice to her. She's been through a lot. She still is fighting that battle. She needs you bache. Hold her hand and guide her through it."
"I will" he tried smiling, her words hitting him hard. He finally kissed his mother goodbye and walked out of the door.

****
Sidharth was again lost in thought while driving to her work. This time the thoughts were much deeper, much more intense. His heart was constantly beating erratically inside his chest. Imagining her like that, it was painful for him. He knew she wasn't okay but his mother talking of it like that, it seriously hit him hard. She told him that she saw love in Sana's eyes. Just the thought, it was doing something to him. He needed her in his arms. He reached her office in a few minutes and dialed her number. She cut the call on the second bell. He sat there with one hand resting on the steering and the other laid on his thigh. She walked out exactly after a minute. One look at her face, and he knew she wasn't okay. He sighed. He extended his arm opening the door as soon as she reached. She had a pout and a slight frown on her forehead.
"Ahaaaaaan Ghussa mat karna. Mai theek nahi hoon" she whined as soon as the door opened and she stepped inside. He just rolled his eyes silently and straightened staring the car. He reversed the car and they left. She sat properly leaning back and then turned to face him when she noticed he wasn't talking. His jaw was tightly clenched and his arm rested on the window and his hand under his chin. She knew he was mad at her. She didn't want that. She just wanted his love and pampering. She had already had enough of his anger and to top it up, she wasn't feeling well either. Her eye sockets and her entire head seemed like a huge rock was tied to them and her throat was scratchy and ached. She kept looking at him for a few more seconds and when he still didn't talk, she spoke
"Sidhaaaarth, baat tou karo naaa" she stretched each word extending her hand and laying it on his fore arm. He remained quiet and softly removed her fingers from his arm pushing it away. She gasped lightly.
"Ye kyaa hai..itna ghussa kyun kar rahay ho? Acha sorry naaa. ab tou theek ho jao" she mumbled again leaning towards him trying to rest her chin on his arm.
'Tch Sana, peeche ho k betho. I'm driving." He clicked his tongue pushing her back. She glared at him, her pout intensifying. She straightened up and leaned her head back on the seat closing her eyes. She quietly started pressing the top of her eyes and eyebrows with the pads of her fingers slowly. It was slightly relieving the pain. They stopped at a signal soon after and Sidharth slowly turned his head to look at her. She seemed so uncomfortable, so weak. He slowly lifted his hand from the gear and still looking straight at the road, he softly started pressing her forehead with his fingers. The moment his fingers touched her skin, she gasped and her own fingers stopped right there. She opened her eyes and turned to look at him, but he was still looking straight at the road. She smiled. He cared so much. She leaned further in the seat enjoying the feel of his fingers on her head. The signal soon opened and he removed his hand but just when he was about to change the gear, she quickly placed a kiss to the back of his hand. She closed her eyes and just decided to wait till they reached back home. After a few minutes, the car stopped. Sana opened her eyes and she was surprised. They weren't home. They were in fact parked outside a local food joint called "Bachelorr's". she turned to look at him ,
"Sidharth? Yahan kyun aaye hain?" she asked surprised that he didn't take her home straight away. Though she did feel hungry.
"Kha lo pehle kuch, then we'll go" he spoke plainly.
He pressed the horn and gestured the waiter to come using his index and middle finger, while his eyebrows furrowed the slightest bit. He looked so powerful, so ho, so rugged, she lost her mind. All she wanted at that moment was to climb in to his lap and kiss him. She gulped looking away, slightly biting her lower lip. They ordered their sandwiches and something to drink with it. Once the waiter left, she again took his hand in hers and spoke softly
"Sidhaaarth please naa. Ghussa chor do. Baat tou karo. Mai dukhi ho rahi hoon aise" she pouted sadly. He rolled his eyes.
"Acha? Tou jab baat mane ki baari aati hai tab kahan hoti ho? Kon sa IMO sign kar lia aaj jaa k?" he spoke sarcastically. His nostrils flaring the slightest bit. She pressed soft sweet kisses to the back of his hand
'Acha naaa. shhhh. Please mat daanto" she mumbled in between her kisses. His heart was melting at the sight. All he wanted was to cradle her in his arms. He wasn't angry at her because she went against him, he was angry and worried because of everything she was putting herself through because of him. She was not okay at all and she still went to work and that had further aggravated her state. That's why he was irked. Their sandwiches arrived soon and the moment she saw them, her entire mood lit up and he knew. He knew she hadn't eaten anything properly in the morning either. They had ordered chicken cheese grilled sandwiches and they looked amazing. Sana dug in right away and right after the very first bite, she felt so much better. She was silently enjoying her sandwiches and so lost in them that she didn't know how his gaze was fixed on her face. His eyes finally softened seeing her enjoy her sandwiches so much.
"Bohaaat achay hain" she spoke with the bite in her mouth and went back to eating. He smiled softly. She was such a baby.
He held her chin softly between his fingers and spoke
"Aur khana hai?" he wiped the slightest bit of sauce on her chin. His serious eyes sstill did something to her. She slowly shook her head.
"Chalo, khao aramse" he left her chin and took a sip of his drink.
"iske baad we're going home?" she asked. He nodded.
"Good"
"Kyun?"
"Kyunki mujhe apko hug kar k bohaaaat sara sona hai" she mumbled honestly. His heart thudded wildly in his chest. He saw her sandwiches were almost finished.
"kuch aur khaye gi?" he asked her softly. She looked up at hi with such purity, that he felt he would pass out. She suddenly leaned towards him from above the gear box and placed a sweet kiss on his jaw.
"Nahi. Yahi bohat tha. Thank you" she whispered shyly. He gave her a small smile and called the waiter for the bill. They soon left the place and Sana felt much better. She could tell that his anger had subsided a bit and she too felt much better after eating. She didn't realize how hungry she was. Once they reached his house, he slowly got out of the car and walked towards her side, opening her door. He bent and softly opened her belt while she stared at him dreamily. He then bent and grabbed her hand bag from below. She was just getting out of her seat when he straightened back and extended his hand for her to take. She took his hand and he pulled her out, grabbing her waist. She leaned towards him while his hand rested at the small of her back as they walked inside. Sana instantly felt so much better as soon as they stepped inside the house but she also felt shy. The constant realization that she had told him what he was to her, was unnerving her along with his strong presence. He walked behind her and spoke
'Come. change kar le then take a painkiller and sleep" he held her by her waist and walked her to his room. Sana was suddenly feeling a little conscious. Yes, she had slept with him there, in his arms but changing in his washroom was making her really giddy. She didn't really know what to say or do. Sidharth went and sat on his bed and started removing his shoes. Sana stood there nervously and then softly mumbled
'Mai wahan change kar k aayi. Aap aramse jao bathroom" she spoke hurriedly and turned, walking outside the door. He stared at her confused.
"Isey kya hua?" he mumbled to himself.
He changed into a pair of shorts after freshening up a little and went outside to get a glass of water along with the painkillers for her. Sana was still so giddy and nervous around him. as soon as more time kept passing by, the realization of how she had let it all out in front of him kept coming and hitting her. Although he hadn't once made her awkward or uncomfortable about any of it but she was really feeling it all. She had never felt this way for anyone before, and she had never ever said any such thing to anyone before, not even to Akshay. Every time he would profess his love for her, she would smile and change the topic. So this was all very new and it felt surreal. She freshened up and changed in to the pair of night suit she had brought with her . She was really in need of some clothes now. She finally walked outside and found him in the lounge, filling up her glass. She walked towards him
"Sidharth" she spoke softly. He turned and looked at her. He picked up the glass and the medicine walking towards her. He came and stood right in front of her with the same serious expression.
'Abhi bhi ghussa ho?" she mumbled. He sighed.
"Nahi hoon baba, ye le. Have these" he said handing her the tablets.
"Nahi. Pehle batao" she insisted.
"Sana kya pagal panti hai ye? Mera dimagh aur mat sadao. Chup chaap khao ye" he spoke angrily thrusting the tablets in her palm and giving her the glass of water. She sighed taking it. She opened her mouth and carefully placed both the tablets on her tongue constantly looking at him cutely. He kept standing there ensuring she takes it right away. She then gulped in some water and then wiped her lips with the back of her hand and gave the rest of the water back to him. He finally sighed. He took the glass and put it down and moved back to her. She was standing there with a slight frown etched on her beautiful face. He finally grabbed her by her waist and pulled her closer using both his hands. She wasn't expecting that. She looked up at his face, lost. He softly tucked her hair behind her ears and spoke
"Abhi theek ho jayega thori dair mai. Chal, sou jaa ab" he spoke as softly as he could. She leaned her face closer and rested her chin on his chest looking up at his face cutely.
"Wo tou theek ho hi jayega, aap kab ho ge?" she asked him. His fingers kept caressing her face and whatever part of it came in contact. His eyes seemed so distressed and so deep. They were constantly rummaging through her face.
"Mai theek hoon baba. I was just worried for you" he bent placing a sweet kiss to her cheek and holding her face in both his hands and caressing her cheekbones with his thumbs.
"I'll be fine as long as you're with me. Aap bas naraaz mat hua karo. I don't like it. Mere yahan dard hoti hai. Sachii" she moved back placing his palm right across her abdomen, blinking at him. He softly pecked her lips and bent lifting her up in his arms swiftly. She almost gasped not expecting that. She instantly wrapped her hands around his neck. He started moving towards his room, staring at her with that same intensity that made her want to go hide in a hole. He placed her on the bed softly and pushed her back a little making her liew back. He covered her with the duet and she immediately spoke
"Aap bhi aao sath," she extended her hand towards him as he walked to the other side.
"Haan baba aa raha hoon just a second." He picked the remote up setting the temperature of the room to perfection. He dimmed the light and finally stepped inside the bed. He lied down straight and pulled her closer by the arm that was stretched out.
"Chal close your eyes now. You need to rest" he spoke softly rubbing her back. She placed a kiss to his chest and sighed, closing her eyes. He lulled her into sleep before she even realized. He laid like that with her in his arms, sleeping peacefully. The constant rise and fall of her chest indicating of her deep peaceful sleep was soothing his own heart. His phone vibrated after a while and he instantly grabbed it fearing not to wake her up. He cut the call and then softly removed her hand that was wrapped around his chest and pushed her back to the pillow making sure to not wake her up. He kept her hand on her own stomach and got out of the bed grabbing his phone. It was a work call.
Sana woke up after a good two three hours of deep sleep. Her eyes stirred a little and she tried pressing her face deeper in her chest but when she didn't feel right, she reluctantly opened her eyes. the bed was empty and the room was pretty dark. She had no clue what time it was and for how long had she slept and where was he? She slowly rubbed the back of her eyes and yawned. Her headache was however much much better now and so were her eyes. They finally seemed lighter. She stretched her arm and grabbed her mobile. It was around 6pm in the evening. She realized she had slept for so long but she felt so much better. She tied her hair in a lose bun and wore her slippers still yawning. She wanted to freshen up a bit before going out to look for him.
Sidharth had sat outside in the lounge for the rest of the afternoon watching TV and then talking to his mom for a while. He wanted her to rest and sleep as much as she could and so he didn't want to go inside and disrupt her sleep. His mind was still full of thoughts and fears but he wanted her to first be okay. She soon walked out the room looking like an absolute fluff ball. Her hair were in a lose bun and her cheeks and eyes were almost swollen due to sleeping so deeply and her lips were red and puckered up. He missed them. Badly. She quietly walked up to him and he immediately stretched his hand out for her to take. He was leaned back on his sofa and his legs were outstretched. She silently took his hand and walked right in his lap making herself comfortable and wrapping her hands around his neck.
"Theek se soya mera baby? How are you feeling now?" he grabbed her waist and asked lovingly. He pressed a kiss to her head.
"Bohaaat ache se soyi. I feel so much better. The eyes and the head, they all feel like they're finally mine again. Pehle tou kisi haathi k lag rahay they" she mumbled pressing her face to the side of his face. He chuckled.
'Tou matlab tere hi huay na" he spoke seriously. Her eyes were closed.
"Kya?"
"Tu bhi tou chota sa cute sa haathi hi hai na" he said. Her eyes shot open and she gasped angrily smacking his cheek.
"Bakwaas mat bolo. Nonsense" she galred at his face. He laughed looking at her and placed a kiss to her nose.
"Mmmmm" she closed her eyes again and rested her face on his shoulder, taking in the peace she felt.
"Kya hua, still sleepy?". She shook her head silently.
"Tou?"
She shook her head again. He frowned .
"Arey tou bol kyun nahi rahi. Look at me". She again shook her head.
"Abey kya hua haiii?" he turned her face to look at her. she sat with her eyes closed.
"Mujhe aap se sharam arahi hai" she mumbled, her cheeks heating up the slightest bit. He narrowed his eyes and then let out a loud laugh.
"WHAT?? KYUN?" he asked comically.
"Tch. Bas arahi hai naaa. Mujhe kya pata kyun" she mumbled pressing her face further in his shoulder. He pulled her closer by her waist and pressed her completely to his chest.
"Sana. Look at me" he spoke huskily. She tightened her arms around him and shook her head.
"No"
"Please na baba" he requested. That tingled her heart. She slowly lifted her face up and opened her eyes to find his smearing hot gaze on her. her stomach was suddenly flipping.
"Kyun sharam arahi hai?" his husky voice undid her. She looked away and slightly shook her head.
He grabbed her face with his fingers and turned her face to himself.
'Abhi tou mene kuch kia hi nahi hai" he moved closer, eyeing her lips. She inhaled sharply.
"Ahaaan Sidharth ye sab mat bolo, mujhe aur sharam aati hai" she mumbled covering her face using both her hands. He laughed.
"Abey kya hai tu, hain? Kabhi ek dam itni violent ho jati hai aur kabhi ye sab" he tried removing her hands from her face but she pressed them harder.
"Aap ab ghussa tou nahi ho na? Mujhe maaf kar dia?" she suddnely changed the topic, with her face still covered between her hands. He immediately stopped. There it was, the fear in her voice was still there. He sighed and tried pulling her hands apart.
"Sana, please. Lemme see you baby" he sighed, his heart aching.
She finally removed her hands and her eyes were fixed down. She wasn't looking at his face.
"Aise kyun baar baar poochti hai bacha? Kya hogaya? Nahi hoon mai ghussa meri jaan" he spoke softly tucking her hair back.
"Kyunki aap they. Aur bohat zada they. Bohat zada dair k liye. Aur mujhe darr lagta hai" she mumbled, her voice cracking towards the end. Sidharth felt his heart being crushed physically.   He rubbed her back.
'I know baby. I'm sorry. Par darr gaya tha Sana. You've become everything. Every minute that I was spending with you, it was overpowering me in a way nothing else has before. Ever. And the thought, the constant realization, the constant fear, that I will have to eventually let you go, was destroying me. It was like that boulder sitting on my chest which pressed right across my chest every time I looked at you. Seeing you was like a slap across my face that I have to let you go. That thought was intolerable Sana." He spoke looking her dead in the eyes, her eyes were fixed on his. His words filled her eyes and heart a little. She instantly moved closer and laid both her palms straight on his chest.
"Tujh pe ghussa nahi karna chahta tha kabhi bhi meri jaan. Par wo ghussa, wo doori, it came from a place of extreme fear. I wanted to put distance between us baby. Warna I didn't know what would happen. The moment I would hold you, touch you, it burnt me right then and there thinking of everything I didn't want to." He sighed. She lifted her face up and pressed her lips right next to his.
"Mai itni important hoon aapke liye?" she asked him with that same innocence.
"Sab kuch hai" he caressed her beautigul face in his hands.
"Phir se tou nahi naraz ho ge na?"
"Nahi meri jaan" he sighed pressing a ksis to her forehead.
"Sidharth mai sab jaanti hoon. Mujhe ek bhi din aap pe ghussa nahi aaya uss sab k liye, jaante ho kyun? Kyunki mujhe pata tha k mai kya kar rahi thi aur usne aap k sath kya kar dia. Mene bhi tou apko kitni takleef di na. Mujhe sirf darr laga apki narazgi se, kyunki aadat hogayi thi itni aapki. Apke bina kuch sahi nahi lag raha tha. I never thought I would feel this way for someone" she pressed her chin on his torso looking up in his eyes, with her teary gaze. 
"Mujhe pata hai aapke dimagh mai abhi bhi bohat kuch chal raha hai. Par Sidharth, mujhe kahin aur nahi jana, bas yahan rehna hai. Mujhe nahi karni usey shaadi, sachi. Mujhe soch k bhi kuch hota hai. Mai apke bagheir pagal hoti hoon" she mumbled laying her heart open yet again. He bent and placed a quick chaste kiss to her lips.
"Mene aaj Mumma ko call kit hi office se. I told her clearly k mujhe kuch nahi pata, she needs to tell everyone at home right away. Mujhe aur wait nahi karna" she spoke with frustration.
"Par Sana, What if they don't agree.. or what if they try pressurizing you.. and what if Akshay.." he was at a loss of words. His turbulent eyes were disturbing her. she grabbed his hand and kissed his fingers softly.
"NAHI" she said looking in his eyes, trying to assure him.
"Mujhe aur koi nahi chahiye na Sidharth. Bas aap chahiye ho. Mene jo kuch bola kal. Wo sab aise hi nahi tha Sidharth. Mai wo sab sirf emotional ho k nahi bol rahi thi, samjhe aap? Mean karti hoon sab kuch. Ek ek baat" she stopped staring into his eyes.
"Karti hoon aap se pyaar. Sab se zada. Ho aap mere liye sab se upar" she spoke despite her heating cheeks. She didn't once look away and Sidharth felt like his entire world stopped right there yet again. His eyes darkened and he moved closer.
"You're everything my baby. You're everything my heart had stopped wanting" he whispered right on top of her lips. His warm breaths and his words were tingling her in places she couldn't count.
"Aap bhi" she managed to whisper.
He pressed his lips on hers pulling her closer. His hands rested on her lower back and her palms still laid flat across his chest. He sucked her lips with a force that threatened to dissolve her entire being. She felt so helpless in the kiss. He was completely overtaking her. He softly bit on her lower lip and a soft moan escaped her throat. She slowly moved her hands up wrapping them around his nape and tugging at his hair softly. He bit her lip harder and as soon as her mouth opened, his tongue invaded the insides of her mouth. Sana was so lost. She felt she was floating. She could feel such different sensations all over her body that it was hard to focus on any one. His hands slowly moved lower and he cupped her bottom, grabbing it.
Sana moaned loudly and tried pushing at his chest the minute she felt like she would pass out with the intensity of sensations and her breath almost running out. Sidharth reluctantly left her lips with a final tug at her lower lip. Sana's eyes were closed and her swollen lips parted.
"Baby. I can't tell you what you do to me" he pressed his nose to hers. Sana was still panting and her cheeks were flushed.
"Mujhe sharam aati hai. Mujhe itna kuch ajeeb hota hai. Aap mujhe pagal kar rahay ho" she rambled it all out.
"Kya ajeeb hota hai baby? Tell me" he rasped.
"Mhmmm" she closed her eyes tighter pressing her face across his chest.
"Aisay sab mat bola karo naaaa" she whined.
"Sana you drive me insane. I want to do so much yet I want to cherish this innocence of yours. It drives me wild" his thick and raspy voice was tingling her insides. She could literally feel her stomach flipping.
"Aisay baat kya sabke sath karte ho?" she mumbled.
"Kon sab bey?" he asked.
"Sab ladkiyo k sath? Sab girlfriends?" . His eyes widened and he bent his head to look at her face.
"Oye?? Kya matlab? Kon sab? Kya lagta hai tujhe? Kitni girlfriends hain meri ,han?" he asked her comically.
"Mujhe kya pata" she played along.
'Tu girlfriend hai meri?" his tone instantly turned serious. It was husky. Sana's insides flipped hearing that. She didn't respond.
"Bol na" he rasped.
"Sidhaaarth"
"Tell me Sana. Are you my girlfriend?" his voice was dripping with intensity and desire.
"Mujhe nahi pataaa. Shhhh" she pressed her face deeper in his chest.
"Look up Sana" his voice had such serious command that she felt like submitting her entire being just hearing that. She shook her head.
"Sanaaa" he insisted. She finally took her face out, her eyes closed. He chuckled.
"Kya bol rahi thi abhi?" his voice was low and intimate.
"Kya" she whispered back. Her heart constantly pounding inside her ribcage.
"Kya lagta hai, kya bohat girlfriends hain meri?" he whispered caressing her face with his fingers. His touch electrified her. Her eyes closed back on their own.
"Mujhe kya pata." She managed.
"Tou phir ye kyun bola ?"
"Mujhe bas ye jaana hai k aisi baatein kis kis k sath karte ho?" she mumbled, with her eyes still closed. He smiled.
'Hain koi 4-5 bas. Zada k sath nahi" he smiled looking at her closed eyes. The moment he said that, her eyes shot open and she gasped angrily. She instantly smacked his chest pushing at it.
"KYA MATLAB?" she screamed. He laughed seeing her like that.
'Kya matlab kya?" he was really enjoying this side of hers.
"Kon hai wo chaar paanch. Zara naam tou batao mujhe unn kameeniyo ka" she galfed at him, holding his face tightly in both her hands. He laughed louder and that angered her more. She smacked his cheek lightly.
"Wekho zara eenu. Bari hassi arahi hai, hainn? BOLO naam. ABHI" she pulled his face angrily. He bent forward and pecked her lips, completely loving this side of hers.
"Ye sab mat karo. Naam bolo" she looked like an angry kitten who was ready to pounce on him any moment.
"Kiske naam janay hain baby?" his laughter finally died down and he moved closer to her face, with a glint in his eyes. He wrapped his hands around her back.
"Jiske bhi sath ye sab baatein karte ho" she was so angry. Her eyebrows were furrowed and she had an angry cute pout.
'Ek hi hai. Bohat pyaari, so fucking hot" he whispered.
'Sidhaaaarth k bachay. MAT KAROOOO" she whined angrily. He threw his head back and laughed loudly. She kept staring at his face angrily and then suddenly he heard her sniffle softly. He immediately straightened up and saw small tears forming at the corner of her eyes and her nose turning red. His laughter died right there. He was shocked. She started removing her hands from his chest and started to move down. He immediately grabbed her by the waist and pulled her closer.
"Areyy kahan jaa rahi hai baby?" he asked hurriedly. She kept trying to pull herself away from his arms.
'Mat kaho mujhe baby waby. Aur hato. Mujhe jaana hai" she sniffled, still trying to move away. His grip tightened on her waist and his heart thudded loudly.
'Tou phir kis ko kahu?" he spoke softly.
'Mujhe kya pata? Ussi ko kaho naa. Apni bohat pyaari so fucking hot waali ko" she spat at him and he wanted to laugh and kiss the life out of this girl.
"Ussi ko tou keh raha hoon" he said softly.
Her movements stopped right there as soon as she heard him. Her eyes widened and she looked at him with those same innocent eyes which drove him mad.
"Tu pagal hai? Tere ilawa koi aur ho sakta hai kya baby? There can be nobody like you . Ever. What you do to me, what you are to me, koi aur nahi ho sakta. Kabhi bhi. Tere ilawa koi dikhta hi nahi hai" he spoke looking straight in her eyes, charmingly. She sighed and hugged him tightly, smiling.
"Pagal kahin k. Kitna dara dia mujhe" she mumbled lovingly, hugging him tighter. He hugged her back and smiled.
"Pagal tou tu hai. Tere ilawa koi aur ho bhi kese sakta hai meri jaan? Haven't I told you enough already what you are to me?" he responded back, his breaths falling on her ear.
"Hmmm" she hummed smiling.
"Sana, baby uss din kya ho raha tha?" his voice was suddenly serious. She frowned.
"Kis din" she responded still hugging him.
"Kal. While we were in the bed. When I marked you here" he slowly lifted his finger and touched the red spot on her neck. She gasped hugging him tighter. Her breathing shallow.
"Sidhaarth" she whispered.
"Tell me baby" he was unnerving her.
"I don't know " she whispered, feeling her cheeks and her entire body heating up. He softly rubbed her back up and down.
"Was it down there" he whispered, so close, his breaths so hot. She physically jerked.
"Sidharth. Pleasee" she begged him.
"Please what meri jaan? You need to talk to me. Agar mujhe nahi bataye gi, how will I help you?" his voice was so soft, so soothing. It was slowly easing her.
"Mujhe sharam aati hai aap se. Ye sab nahi pata mujhe. You make me feel so much" she whispered hugging him as tightly as she could. He smiled.
"I'm glad I do. It should only be me" he said with dominance in his voice. She stayed silent at that.
"There's so much you need to know baby. And I want to teach you all that. There's a world that you're unaware of. Lemme open you up to it." he spoke rubbing her back. She almost whimpered.
'Aap sirf aisi baatein bol k kese mujhe pagal kar dete ho? Mujhe sirf apki baatein sun k kuch hota hai naaa" she whined honestly. He laughed a little.
"Mera pagal bacha hai tu" he placed a kiss to the side of her head.
"Let me see if that feeling returns" he whispered pulling her back. Her face was so red and so warm. She looked at him lost. He took her lips in a slow and soft kiss cupping her face in his hands. He softly tugged and sucked her lips, licking them. He then started pressing wet kisses starting from her jaw going all the way down to her neck. She immediately threw her head back, letting him own her. her hands held his shoulders while he kissed every bit of her neck softly nibbling at different spots. Slow moans left her lips. He briefly looked at her divine face and pressed another kiss to her throat. He slowly lifted his fingers and moved them to the first button of her night suit. She gasped loudly and clutched his shoulders tighter, digging her nails in to them. He slowly unbuttoned the top button of her shirt, then the next one. Short gasps of air left her parted lips.
'Sidhaarth" was all she could manage.
"You're okay baby." He whispered.
He opened the first four buttons of her night suit and slowly pushed her shirt back from her shoulders, exposing her shoulders and her cleavage to his dark eyes.
'Fuck" he groaned.
"Look at me Sana" he rasped, looking at her face.
'No. Sidhaaarth, please" she almost begged.
He grabbed her chin pulling her face back and her eyes automatically opened. She saw such warmth in his eyes that she felt she would melt. He placed a chaste kiss to her lips and spoke
'I've got you baby" he spoke.
He bent his face and started placing kisses to her bare shoulders, driving her insane. He then kissed a stride down her cleavage and she moaned loudly, grabbing him.
'Sidhaaarth"
'Shhhh" he then moved the shirt to the side exposing the swell of her breasts and her plain pink bra. He lost his fucking mind. He dipped his head lower and started placing open mouthed kisses right at the top of her chest. Sana's moans were uncontrollable. She gripped him for dear life. He then saw the heart shaped mark right on her heart and he lost his mind.
'FUCKING HELL" he groaned loudly placing his lips right on top of the mark. Sana winced with pleasure. It was so intense, that she felt like her soul would leave her body. She could feel heat rising up her chest and her entire face and down there. Sidharth kept nibbling, sucking and kissing the birth mark and the top of her breasts. Her hands finally moved back to his hair ruffling them. He groaned, nibbling a bit harder. His hands finally started rubbing her stomach and slowly started moving up. His big rough palm softly grabbed her breast. Sana moaned incredibly loud. He pressed his lips on top of hers, shushing her. his palms played with her breasts pleasuring her way too much. Sana was a mess. She didn't care about anything. She just felt like exploding. He kissed her lips to his heart's content and finally moved back when he felt she needed to breathe. He removed his palms and started placing kisses right on top of her breasts slowly moving down. He then placed his lips right on her nubs. Sana screamed loudly pulling at his hair. He kissed one and then moved his lips to the other one, moving her shirt to the side.
'Sidhaaarth". He kissed both of them and moved his lips away, wetting her bra. He could almost see her dark nubs from across the bra and he felt the air leaving his body. He finally placed his hand behind her fallen back head and pulled her. her eyes were closed and her lips parted. He could see the heat and the redness all over her cheeks. She looked so divine, so tempting. He softly pulled her shirt back and started buttoning it up. Sana's eyes slowly opened and the moment she looked at his face, she shut her eyes tightly back. He let out a small laugh. He buttoned her shirt back and spoke softly
'Phir se kuch hua kya?" he whispered. She nodded.
'It's okay. We'll take care of that. Come here now" he pulled her back in his arms, hugging her like a baby. He started rubbing her back and he ran his fingers in her hair, setting them.
"You're such a baby. My baby" he mumbled placing a kiss to her shoulder.