Thikaana

Chapter Five

Sidharth rang the bell and waited. "Hi meri jaan, kesa hai bacha?" his mom smiled hugging him. He hugged her back and kissed her forehead. "I'm good, aap kese ho, all good?" they walked inside. Sidharth had dropped her back home and had come straight to him mother's place. He wanted to spend the rest of the day with her. Also, after having her over at his place for the whole night, he wanted some distraction from his place & so stalled going back for a while. He put his keys and phone down & lied down on the sofa closing his eyes. He seemed, different.
"Kya hua, tabiat theek hai? You seem.. relaxed, anything special? Kalb hi nahi aya, you were supposed to come over yesterday after the darshan ,na?" his mom sat down notcing how he looked calmer & maybe happier? Something about him seemed different. She liked it.
"Yeah, wo I was caught up last night" he sighed opening his eyes and looking at his mom. She raised an eyebrow wanting him to go on. " Wo, was with someone.. a girl I met recently" he turned towards her. He was trying to find the right kind of words to explain it to his mom, he himself was clueless just yet. "oh –kay" she said surprised. That was new. It had been 7 years since she had heard something like that from him. It seriously surprised her, pleasantly though.
"Really? Who was it, tell me about her" she was suddenly excited. He chuckled and got up.
"Arey bhai relax karo, it's not what you're thinking. She's practically a stranger, who I randomly bumped into at the store last week aur kal darshan par saw her again, she was about to faint but I got there just in time. She's from Punjab, abhi aayi hai yahan, to work. Bachi hai, she's really young and naive and alone. So just helped her out last night. Naam bhi nahi jaanta tha kal tak so when she passed out, I had to take her home. Just dropped her back" he spoke casually. His mom was shocked would be an understatement. She listened to him intently and she could already sense his concern for that girl. She was surprised and so happy. She was not trying to reach somewhere with it, but even the realization of him being so protective of a girl who he didn't even know was definitely new for her. She smiled & decided to let it go for now.
"Arey, she'll be all alone here? Acha hua na tu ne dekh lia usko kal. Naam kya hai?"
"Sana". He spoke."Nice. chal I'm so glad you could be there for her bacha" his mother smiled at her son. "Acha chal aja, let's go have breakfast together" his mom pulled him up.
It had been a few hours since he had dropped her back but every now & then he realized that his thoughts would go back to her. He would wonder if she would be okay, all by herself, if she would have eaten or not. He was really amused by himself. He was worrying incessantly for a stranger, for a young girl who he had no affiliation with, he didn't even know if he'd ever be even seeing her again or not. That thought upset him a bit though. He couldn't make sense of it. This girl, held some sort of pull. Despite all the stark differences between their worlds, like she being a stranger, she being so young, being here temporarily, all those factors didn't matter. He was just attracted to her in a very weird way. In a protective yet attractive kind of way. He also didn't want to pay much heed to any such thoughts because he knew this was something that wasn't anything basically. He came to the conclusion, that just because she was young and alone, so naïve so vulnerable, he was just concerned for her. On humanitarian grounds. He sighed and decided to not give much thought to it.
****
It was late afternoon. Sana had come home, showered and talked to her parents on call & even to Shahbaz. She wouldn't call them every day and update about her life because she never had that level of closeness with them but since it had been only 8-9 days of her being here, she had spoken to them 2-3 times  by now. She did not however mention last night's incident to them. One would think that when you are all alone in a new city and something like this happens, your first instinct is to tell your mom or speak to her for comfort but for sana? It wasn't the case. It was not like her mother wouldn't be concerned, but it was just that she would not be able to offer the kind of comfort that she would be looking for and strangely so, being with him last night, had given her comfort enough to not feel the need to share it with anyone else. Sana had talked to Akshay just two days after she had come here and now he was calling and she knew she would have to talk. She breathed, prepped herself & answered the call.
"Hi sana, kesi hai? Sab wadhiya?" Akshay spoke excitedly. She rolled her eyes. "Hi, haan mai theek, sab theek. Tum batao, sab theek? Ghar pe sab?" she spoke plainly.
"Haan sab acha hai, bas aaj weekend hai socha tujhe call kar loon, I know tu ne kaha tha sara week busy rehti hai, par aaj rok nahi paaya khud ko aur bas mai tou abhi se din ginta hoon k jaldi ye mahine guzre aur tu wapis ajaye aur bas humari shaa." He ranted. "Akshay akshay! Hold on. Abhi mujhe aaye huay 8 din huay hain aur tu waapis anay ki baatein kar raha hai? Mujhe yahan bohat seekhna hai abhi, grow karna hai, kuch kaam karna hai. Uss sab mai time tou lagay ga na. Sab waqt k sath ho jayega" Sana said irked. "Haan haan wo tou hai mai tou bas aisay hi keh raha tha. Acha baqi sab acha? I'm sure achay se hi manage kar rahi hogi sab kuch, tujhe tou aadat hai hamesha se akele rehne ki. Chal khayal rakh, aur bas jaldi wapis ajana. Karta hoon mai phir tujhse baat. Chal bye love you take care" he spoke without any breaks. "Haan tum bhi khayal rakho, bubye". Finally. She threw the phone on the bed. See, this is what it was. Akshay per se, was not a bad person, he was good he was sweet but the thing was that he always took her and this relationship as a task. As something that is there because it had to be and so it is and you have to now fulfil it because this is what it was always supposed to be. Sana always felt that he probably doesn't even love her really but because that's what he has always been told and taught so he just thinks it's how it is supposed to be. She always felt that he always says and does at the surface, he has never reached that depth of her heart or soul. She has never felt belonged with him. She huffed & went to the kitchen to make something for her. She was starving.
Sana was sitting having her Paratha and Dahi when she got the time to reflect back on last night. The sudden realization that if he wouldn't have been there at that time, in the pandal, what would have happened? Or if he would have actually turned out to be a rapist or killer? She smiled to herself. She was grateful that he wasn't either of them, and also, that he was there for her yesterday. If not for him, she didn't know what would have happened. The thought that he was kind enough to go out of his way to help out a stranger warmed her heart. It made her realize that he was truly a good person. She still had her inhibitions around him, she was still pretty intimidated by his aura, by the power and authority and conviction his demeanor held but along all these, she also felt protected and safe. The thought that he too was here in this city was kind of comforting for her, and for now? It was enough.
****
It had been three days since he had dropped her back home. He had just returned back from a domestic flight and was itching to call her up and check up on her. He just had this insanely strong protective instinct for her which had him amused too. He had never felt so strongly protective for someone he didn't even know. But here he was. Often times his mind would wander off to her and a sudden surge of concern would kick in, thinking if she would be alright. He really wanted to call her up & make sure she was doing alright. His fingers were roaming over her contact, he really wanted to press it and just check up on her, but then, after a few minutes of thought he decided to let it go. He was at an age and phase in life where he had no time or energies to invest in something that was to have absolutely no meaning or point. She was that stranger for him. Yes, he helped her, yes he did feel really protective of her but that was that. There was nothing more to it, so he just let her be. Plus, she had his number, if there's any time where she feels the need to reach out to him, she can. He went inside to change, he had the next day off and then he was going for an international flight and wouldn't be here for the next 5 days.
Sana had been settling in well in terms of work. She was loving the fact that she was getting to live her dream and make something out of it. So she was loving the process but Mumbai still overwhelmed her. It was a world in itself about which she knew nothing. The system here, the people, how fast paced the city was, how people were so on the go always. She didn't know anybody here, except for one, maybe. That thought was comforting. At least there was someone who she knew in this city, even if it was barely but it was something. So there were days, in fact almost every day where she would just get overwhelmed with the city and with everything about it. Especially after going back home, she would feel it all the more. Although she had always been used to of living by herself, but it was always in smaller towns with lesser people. This was Mumbai. It intimidated her at times. She was still absorbing it all in.
Sana had winded up her work an hour earlier today as she had some bank work to go for. All her life she had been in Punjab, and never really needed a personal bank account until now since her needs had been met through her parents. However, now that she was here in Mumbai and was working, she needed a bank account of her own. Her office had also told her the same. They had asked her to get an account open here so that her first pay could be transferred there. Opening a bank account was a long tedious process about which she knew absolutely nothing She had been away from all these things all her life and she found it all very boring and just not her cup of tea. It was a necessity now but the only thing bothering her was that this place was new, she didn't have much knowledge about all of this anyways and to top it up, this was a new place. She was clueless as to which bank to choose, where it would be, what would the whole procedure be, plus she had no contacts here either. She didn't want to sound dumb asking her colleagues about it either.
He was watching the news and sipping his tea when his phone rang. He was having a lazy day today, sitting in his shorts. There was a slight stubble on his face and his hair were messy, nobody could tell he was the same Captain Sidharth who was always so proper with his uniform, his entire look and with that intimidating no nonsense attitude that everyone stayed wary of. He seemed so relaxed. He was enjoying some off time before he goes away for his long flight the next day. He casually picked up the phone, while keeping his cup down on the table and the moment he looked at the screen, he stopped. Finally.
"Hey" He spoke.
"Uhh.. hi, sidharth?" she spoke softly. She was a bit nervous and unsure. She was yet again bothering him but he seemed like the only person who she could reach out to and who would help her. She had this unknown surety that he wouldn't mind helping her out. He smiled. When he had almost decided to let it go, here she was. He could sense the unsure voice.
"yeah, kesi ho? How have you been, all good?" he asked sitting back. She was nervous while calling him up but after listening the calmness in his voice, calmed her nerves down. She relaxed.
"Haan mai tou ek dam theek, aap batao, aap kese ho?" she was much calmer now. He gave such a soft smile. The innocence in her voice always did something to him. He noticed how she always needed a little nudge from him to open up.
"I'm good too, was just relaxing aaj since I'm going for an international flight kal. So won't be here for a while."
"Acchaaa, tou kal aap jaa rahay ho? Phir tou acha hua mujhe aaj mil gaye" she spoke hesitantly, thinking of how to ask for his help yet again".
"Kya hua? What's up" he knew he had to push her.
"Wo na, meko bank account khulana hai yahan for the salary & all par mai kahan jaun? Mujhe ye sab bakwaas kaam nahi atay aur na hi mujhe karna pasand hai " she spoke, he chuckled at that. "Ab mai kahan jaun konse bank aur kese sab .. so I thought k aap se help maang loon, if you're not too busy that is. Par aapka tou aaj off hai na, kal aap ne jana bhi hai, aaj aisay hi apko tang karungi.. umm rehne do bas mujhe bata do k .." she blabbered. He was quietly listening to her rant & an involuntary smile came on his face, he knew she wanted him to be there but was hesitating.
"Oye, break tou lagao. Relax. Let me come & I can take you to a good reliable bank?" he asked her. She wanted him to come but all her life she had been so independent even when she didn't want to be, that asking or relying on a stranger for help was still new to her.
"Are you sure? I mean, if it's not too much of a hassle. I'd honestly really like it if you could come" she said at the end with confidence. He liked it.
"Gimme 20 minutes, I'll be there. Tumhe office se pick kar k wahin se we can go to the bank. See you". He put the phone down. It felt .. something. He was happy that she reached out. He was happier that he was at home. He quickly went in for a shower. Sana felt at peace. It felt so different and personal. Seemingly he was a stranger to her, yet he was coming to pick her up from the office.
Sidharth reached her office and rang her to come out. He was excited to see her. In all the three meetings, this was the first one where they were meeting in a different scenario. This was the first time she had willingly reached out to him. His gaze was stuck to the door when he saw her walking out. She was wearing a white kurta and black pants. Her hair was in a ponytail and her face was bare of any makeup. She just had some kajal in her eyes. She seemed tired but so pretty.
Sana looked up and there he was. She walked closer to the car and had a glimpse of him. She felt excited like a little girl. It was a different kind of excitement. The kind you have when you know someone is so out of your league and so different from you, so cool, so powerful yet you wanna be friends with them? You wanna know them. It was that kind of excitement. He was wearing a dark grey shirt with a black jeans. His face had a day's stubble, and his beautiful eyes were covered in shades. His hair looked amazing. Every time she saw him, she realized how hot he was. The thought itself seemed forbidden to her. She smiled at him getting inside, and so did he. He took of his shades and met her eyes.
"Hey" he smiled at her with such warmth that she could feel the nervousness ebbing away. This is what it was about him. Being around him, he radiated such a strong aura, somebody you would think twice before talking to or messing with but when he spoke to her, or took care of her, he exuded such warmth and comfort that it would instantly out her at ease. It was the kind of comfort that she would long for yet would feel so differently new.
"How are you, how has work been, enjoying?" he asked reversing the car.
"It's been good, I'm still understanding things par acha hai. Mai khush hoon." She smiled at him. He smiled hearing the genuineness in her voice. "I'm glad" he said.
"Mumbai kesa lag raha hai? Settling in well? It can often be too much to take in" he spoke glancing at her, she was looking ahead.
"Haye bilkul sahi kaha. Mumbai hai tou acha par na abhi bhi mai iss shehar ko yahan k logo ko yahan k taur tareeko ko samajh rahi hoon. Aur phir itnay baray shehar mai hoon bhi tou akeli, zada kuch pata puta tou hai nahi abhi mujhe. Na kahin aati jati hoon, na kisi se milti hoon bas office se ghar aur ghar se phir office." She pouted sadly. He could see that it was very overwhelming for her. He didn't like the part about being all alone though. He instantly extended his hand and lightly brushed his fingers with hers to gauge her reaction. She instantly looked up but it wasn't something uncomfortable. He kept his fingers on hers and spoke "Arey, akeli kahan ho, you know me, don't you? Aur don't worry dheere dheere aur logo ko bhi jaan jaugi. Plus kisi bhi nayi jaga ko samajhne mai time tou lagta hai na? Don't go too hard on yourself, you'll be just fine. Aur mai hoon na? you can always reach out. " he explained her so well yet again, comforting her heart. She smiled.
"Thank you. Haan aap ho isi liye tou aaj ek dam se apko phone kar dia, warna ye bank boonk k kaam mujhe nahi atay aur na mujhe karne mai interest hai" she said scrunching her nose. He gave out a small chuckle listening to her. She was so cute. They reached the bank in another 10 minutes. Sidharth guided her with all the formalities and procedures along with the bank manager. They sat through the entire procedure for about an hour and once the documents were processed, she was told that her account would be opened in the coming days. They were walking back towards his car when she spoke "Haye shukar hai aap agaye yahan, warna mera tou satyanaas hi ho jata ye sab bakwaas dekh aur sun k, samajh bhi nahi aana tha. Thank youuuuuu" she said excitedly and before she could realize, she out of excitement, grabbed his arm with her hands. Her hold on his arm instantly slowed his steps and he looked down at her. She seemed so excited & he could tell she didn't realize what she just did. The moment she looked up at him and realized she got awkward and instantly removed her hand and looked away. "Uhh wo sorry, I got a bit carried away" she said moving away. This is what bothered him. He didn't like her getting awkward around him.
"Oye, it's okay, itna formal mat ho" he extended his arm and gave a slight squeeze to her shoulder to ease her up. She just gave a small smile, still feeling a bit uneasy.
"Up for coffee? Yahin paas mai there's this really cool place. I love their coffee. You up for it?" he asked her hoping she would say yes. He just wanted to be around her for some more time.
"Ummm...haan theek hai, agar apko koi aur kaam nahi hai tou" she looked up at him with her beautiful innocent eyes. He felt himself melting in those brown orbs. "Come" he took her towards the car.
They had ordered their coffees in the car & were waiting up for their order to arrive. Meanwhile Sidharth was telling her random facts about Mumbai and she was listening intently. She realized how she enjoyed when he talks and the way he talks. "Aap kitne lucky ho na? Yahin rahay ho hamesha se, apke liye tou it's all so simple no? It's all like your own place, your comfort zone, your home, because it is" she said. He frowned at her. "So? How does it make a difference? Aisay tou tumhare liye Punjab and your hometown is your comfort zone, par mere liye nahi hai. Aisay hi tou hota hai na, aap jahan rehte ho of course wo jaga apka comfort zone ban jati hai, you know everything about it but that's not the case for any other city. Koi na koi jaga tou hamesha apke liye unknown territory hoti hi hai na. Aisay hi tou hum seekhte hain" he tried explaining to her and it made complete sense. She noticed how easily she would always get his point, by always she meant that during these three times they had met, whatever he would say, his logics his sensibility of things always spoke to her heart. She nodded understandingly and smiled. He returned it. "So chill kar, you'll soon find your way around Mumbai too. Jab yahan reh rahi ho, tou sab samajh bhi jao gi, tension nahi lene ka" he winked at her. She laughed.
Sana was slowly loosening up & it warmed his heart. Their coffee had arrived and she was enjoying it when her phone rang. Her phone was in her lap & she was busy sipping her coffee like a baby, he observed, when his eyes fell on her phone. "Akshay" it said, he saw how she was unbothered so he let it go thinking she wasn't interested in answering. The phone stopped ringing and she turned to him " This is really good" her face was bent towards the glass and she was staring up at him with her eyes. He smiled at her and was about to answer when the phone rang again. His eyes flickered to the phone & to her face. She was staring at the phone conflicted. He assumed she was uncomfortable taking the call in front of him. "Oye why don't you get it, sun lo kuch important ho shayd". She looked up & nodded. "Hi akshay, kese ho?" she spoke softly. He observed quietly while sipping the coffee. He wondered who it was, probably a friend, or cousin? Maybe colleague? She had also mentioned a brother, probably him? He noticed how her tone was getting lower & the conversation seemed very one sided. She had a reserved tone. "Haan im okay, wo 3-4 days time nahi mila na to call, I've told you na office days mai I'm really busy" she was getting really uncomfortable. She quickly glanced up at him while he was checking his phone. He didn't want to pry. "Acha Akshay you take care, main na abhi kaam se bahir hoon, mai phir tumse araamse baat karti hoon. Haan, wo mai karti hoon, chalo..ok..bye" she kept the phone down. Sidharth looked up, he didn't feel like asking who it was.
"Uhh..sorry, wo Akshay tha..my fiance" she spoke softly looking at him. Sidharth stopped. Like really stopped. He felt that someone had just thrown ice cold water on him, it felt like a harsh splash of ice cold reality hitting him. He was fine otherwise, but it was just a reality check which came out of nowhere and hit him so that he doesn't lose it. he still was a little overwhelmed. He had no idea how to deal with this information. Out of all the possibilities, this wasn't the one that had crossed his mind. He put the phone down, and met her eyes.
"Ohh. I didn't know that you were engaged. That's nice. Kab se?"
"Yeah, wo abhi tak aisi koi baat hi nahi hui k mai batati. It's almost been two years now." The fuck. Two years? All of these were coming & hitting him one after the other like a bucket of ice cold water being thrown at him repeatedly.
"That's cool. Waah bhai, I thought tum tou choti ho lekin tum tou bari chupi rustam nikli" he chuckled at her.
" Touuu? Choti mai hoon, par 25 ki hoon itni koi baby thori hoon. Aur haan bas wo ive known him all my life, bachpan ka friend hai so bas ghar waalo ne kar di sagai aur phir kuch waqt baad shaadi. Once I go back from here" she smiled with a sigh. He noticed that but let it go.
"Arey lovelyy. Ye tou fit hai bhai. So you're plans are all sorted han?" he asked keeping the glass down & getting ready to leave. She looked at him and felt that his comments didn't seem as genuine but she didn't think much about it. she was already too bummed.
The rest of the car ride was pretty much silent apart from a few questions she was asking every now & then about different spots in the city. His answers were limited & mostly one worded. She noticed how one of his arm was leaning on the window and his hand was in front of his mouth. He suddenly seemed serious & more intimidating than earlier. She didn't understand. She was again starting to feel uncomfortable around him with the sudden change in his demeanor. Sidharth reached her building & looked at her. She did too. He just looked at her, he wanted to. He was just wrapping his head around all the information he had just come to know. He didn't know what exactly to say. He wasn't even sure if he would see her again or if he even wanted to? He wasn't mad or angry. He just was unsure of how he felt.
" Thank you so much Sidharth. I ruined your holiday but you were such a big help. Aagar aap na atay aaj, pata nahi ye sab mai kese karti. So thank you. Uhh... all the best for your flight tomorrow, I'll ..uhh.. see you I guess?" she spoke hesitantly. Her voice had uncertainty and nervousness. His seriousness had thrown her off guard. She thought she had ruined his day off & he had to attend to a stranger for no reason at all & that had led to him being closed off. He was just looking at her. He could tell his seriousness had scared her off. He didn't want that. He just...he didn't know yet if he was to or would be seeing her that often or not. He nonetheless smiled at her and tried putting her at ease.
"Arey pagal ho? Chill karo na yaar. It was no big deal at all, I'm glad I could help. You take care han? And just know, I'm always a call away" he genuinely smiled at her extending his hand and patting her hand lightly. She smiled back. "Thank you, take care" she got off the car & went inside. He watched her go and then sighed. He closed his eyes and leaned back on the head rest of the seat. He was kind of happy that he got to know this about her. She was taken. She belonged to someone else, and honestly it was..good. He was not at a point in life where he could anyways be invested in something that was to have no outcomes. She was anyways too young, too different, she didn't even belong here. She'll be going back soon. So it was good. His protectiveness was still there, but he realized he was getting too involved caring or worrying and he didn't have to. Sidharth was a person who gave his all and his people? They had to be his. He was happy that he got to know timely. He still cared for her but he decided to let her be. He couldn't afford too much involvement. He was happy that he was leaving tomorrow. He could really use some time away and clear his head out. He started the car & left her building.