Forever (Epilouge)

115

That's pretty much all we did anymore, because I wasn't comfortable taking the girls to very public places by myself. The grocery store was about as public as it got while Colby was away.

I was starting to really have a hard time, since I felt like I was just failing the girls. I knew that it wasn't my fault that there was a missing piece to our puzzle, but I still felt bad about it.

The girls deserved only the best.

"Mommy, did you see me?!" Mia squealed happily as she came running over. "Yeah! You did such a great job baby." I said then kissed her wet curls. "Thank you, can we have ghetti for dinner?" She asked as Olivia giggled and pointed to Mia. It my heart soar at how much Olivia loved Mia.

"Sure thing. Let's go." I said then took her hand so we could go get her changed. She insisted on wearing one of Colby's hoodies even though it was entirely too big on her, but I understood because that's literally all I wore.

It just felt like being in his arms.

"Okay, kid. What are we listening to?" I asked as I put Olivia in her car seat. She was fast asleep which was good because she needed to rest.

"Hmmm. Tangled!" Mia said as I nodded and got in the car, "Tangled it is then." I said then put it on. Mia sang along to every song, giggling happily when I would try to imitate the characters voices.

When we got home I took Olivia to the nursery so she could sleep in peace, then went to the kitchen to start cooking dinner.

"Can I put on cartoons, mommy?" Mia asked as she washed her hands so she could cook with me. "Sure, we need something to listen to while we cook, right?" I asked as she nodded. "Yup!" She said then skipped over to the remote so she could put the cartoons on.

I grabbed a big pot and filled it with water, then seasoned it with salt and started to boil it. "Do you want angel hair or spirals?" I asked and held up the two pasta boxes. "Angel hair!" She said and pointed to the angel hair pasta. "Alright, sounds good to me." I said then put the spiral pasta box away.

I felt my hands start to shake about halfway through heating up the pasta sauce but I tried to ignore it. I just had to wait until my dad got here, then I could walk away and deal with my issues. I was doing a good job at ignoring it too until I heard someone violently pounding on the door.

When I looked over, nobody was there.

"Mommy are you okay?" Mia asked as I nodded. "Mhmm..can you grab the cheese from the fridge?" I asked as my heart started beating out of my chest.

I swear I heard pounding on the door.

"Yep!" She said as tears formed in my eyes.

No no no not now...please just wait until dad gets here.

Mia grabbed the cheese and set it on the counter, then sat down so she could start coloring. There wasn't much to do when cooking pasta so she got very bored, very fast.

As I went to check if the noodles were done for the pasta I noticed how bad my hands were actually shaking.

I needed my dad to just get here already.

The noodles were done so I turned the heat off. As I was carrying the pot to the sink though I heard the pounding on the door again, causing me to drop the hot pot onto the floor, making the boiling water spill everywhere.

"Mommy!" Mia exclaimed as I grabbed my chest, feeling it seize up. I opened my mouth to try and talk to her and tell her I was okay but instead I just started to sob, bringing my hands to my hair as I fell to the floor, burning myself intensely in the process.

"MOMMY!" Mia screamed and ran over, crying as the hot water burnt her too. "G-g-go upst-stairs." I stuttered out as I sobbed and pulled my hair. "Mommy! Please get up!" Mia cried out as the front door opened.

"Mia?" My dad asked as she stood up and ran to him, "Something is wrong with mommy!" She screamed as I started pounding my head into the ground, begging myself internally to breathe.

"What?" He asked as Mia sobbed, "Help mommy!" She screamed as my dad came running over. "Oh my god! Mia go upstairs, I'll come get you in a minute. Mommy's gonna be okay, I promise." He said and kissed her cheek before shooing her away.

"Mommy!!! Please don't die!" She screamed and cried as I sobbed and pulled my hair, still ramming my head into the ground. I wanted to tell her I was gonna be okay, but I couldn't breathe.

"Shhh, squirt. It's okay. I'm here." Dad said as he pulled me into his arms, stopping me from hurting myself anymore. I trembled into him as I sobbed uncontrollably.

Dad carried me to the bedroom and laid me on the bed before running into the bathroom to grab a pill. I couldn't stop sobbing as he came running back in with the pill and a glass of water.

"It's okay, squirt. You're safe. You're okay." He said then forced me to take the pill. "M-m-Mia." I wimpered as dad pulled me into his arms, tucking my head under his chin as I sobbed.

"Shhhh she's okay, I'm here. I'm gonna watch the girls...shhhh." Dad soothed as I started to fight off the drowsiness that the pills were trying to give me. "I want Colby." I wimpered as dad tightened his grip on me.

"I know squirt, I know." He whispered then kissed my head as everything faded away to nothing.