The blonde & The bad

Chapter twelve

'Sometimes when the lines get blurry, you find yourself in a bad position.'

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“So you cried and screamed and made some guy punch another guy?” Hugh said when I entered the car, he had been called over by Mrs. Sweets, I on the other hand had only just let go of Guy. Guy whispered some horny teenage things in my ear but I ignored those, Damon was sent to the school nurse and Mrs. Sweets did nothing about Guy. I thought about that all the time, while waiting for my dad. It was a great way to not picture thing from my past. But all I got from it was that I’m not able to think straight after a painful moment, cause all I could come up with involved unicorns, dwarfs and rainbows.

“Funny that you say guy, cause his name is Guy.” I felt good the moment I saw my dad’s smile, he was used to my breakdowns and knew what to do. Only this time it was a little bit different cause I did really opened up to someone, never in my four years of being save with my dads had I thought about telling anyone anything. Until today.

“That’s an awful name.” He said looking at the road ahead, I laughed at him and changed my position so I was angled towards him.

“I thought the exact same thing.” That made him laugh, I looked at him and I knew he could feel my stare burning on his skin.

“But is that Guy, the guy?” He winked at me I flushed red and looked down at my hands.

“Is there something you need to tell me?” I stared at him, unsure about what to say.

“I told him.” I said and before I knew it the car swooped of the road and came to a stop. I looked at Hugh shocked holding the seatbelt.

“You told what? Who? Guy?” At first I thought he would be angry or maybe disappointed, but his facial expression said he was proud. Even without really knowing what was going on.

“I told him my dream, the school counselor. Not Guy.” I looked at my hands, which had trailed down to my lap. I was picking the dirt from under my nails, but my hands were stopped by Hugh who grabbed my hands. I looked up at him, proud still written on his face. I was aware of the fact that my vision got blurry and that there was a high possibility that tears were streaming down my face.

“I’m so proud of you!” He gave me a soft smile, but you could still see the dents in his cheeks.

“I don’t get it, aren’t you disappointed that I told a total stranger something you wanted to know for five years?” I pulled my hands back and dug my nails in my palms, I let my sight trail back to my hands once more. Too afraid of what was coming, maybe an outburst, maybe he would punch the steering wheel and maybe he would start crying. If there was anyone who was unpredictable it was Hugh, and that’s a thing that will never make sense to me. Suddenly the car was filled with loud laughs, they were getting louder and louder and before I knew it, it was all I heard. Even when Hugh had stopped laughing I could hear his echo inside my head, beating its way through my brain but unable to find a way out.

“Sweetie I’m happy you found a way to get it off your chest. I would still be happy if you chose a brick over me, as long as you let it out.” I finally found the strength to look up to him again, and I gave him a smile through my tears. It was enough for him to know I was not ready to say anything, so he started the car again. I was overthinking what happened that day too much in the car and before I knew it, the same feeling I had in Damon’s office was back again.

“He killed her in front of my eyes, I ran away but he caught me. It was my eleventh birthday, and all I can see is her, her lifeless body covered in blood. I don’t even care about the fact that he couldn’t stop beating me that day. Cause the thing that hurts the most was that she died with a smile on her face, she knew it was her only way out. Dying. If she only knew, if only she could be strong enough for another year.” I said when Hugh pulled up on our driveway, he stopped the car in front of the house and looked down. I just looked at the house but didn’t make a move to get out of the car, I could hear him sobbing and all I did was stare. It was the second time today I saw her, there lying on the ground. The sobbing became softer when he opened the door and got out of the car, and when he slapped the door shut it was dead silent in the car. I think I didn’t move for  ten minutes before Marc came running to the car and carried me out of the car, bridal style.