Wonderland // McFly

Anthology

September 28, 2016: McFly Anthology Tour; London, UK

In general, I've found that the only two things people really ever want in life, is to jump forward to the future, or back to the past.

In 2004, six weeks after my Nan had died and I was running out of money, trying to find a job so that I could support myself and not go to an orphanage, I remember quite vividly that everyday for a while, I would have the same thought. I would wish on every star, and beg all the forces of the universe and pray to any God that bothered to listen to me, to let me wake up one day in the future. A future where I was older, and I had a job, and didn't have to constantly worry about money, or where my meals were coming from. And hey, maybe I'd even be married and have a husband so I didn't have to spend all my time alone.

But of course, that didn't happen. I didn't wake up one day in the future. But I made it through. I found the most amazing job, met my four best friends in the entire world, and even had a boss who ended up being kind of like a father figure to me. Things worked out and got better, as they usually do in life.

Seven years later, in 2011, things started to get difficult again. Dougie was in rehab, Tom had just been diagnosed with Bipolar disorder and I had a raging case of Insomnia. Once again, I remember wishing, begging and praying, but this time, that I could go back to the past. Back to a time like Wonderland. Not only so I could warn everyone of what was to come (and maybe stop it), but also to be utterly happy again, like we were then. We were barely adults, living on the road, the boys were putting out number one albums, Dougie and I were in love, and Danny was trying to hide it from everyone, because back then, that was the biggest thing we had to worry about.

But I stayed in 2011, and with time, once again,  things worked out and got better.

So finally, after twelve years, what I've learned is all I really have to be certain in is right now.

And right now, I was in London, sitting in the balcony of The O2 Forum in Kentish Town at a McFly concert.

Yup. A McFly concert.

Term ended for me yesterday, and as soon as I was aware of this, I had bought the first flight to Heathrow I could get.

I had only been able to make it to the last show of the last city on the McFly: Anthology Tour, where they were playing the track lists from Radio:ACTIVE and Above the Noise for the fourth time.

The show had been amazing thus far, and though admittedly Above the Noise wasn't necessarily my favorite McFly album, I wouldn't want to be anywhere else in the world right now.

I couldn't name the track order of these albums out for you (surprisingly), but I knew we were getting to the end of the show as Tom sat at the piano and the other three band members lounged around onstage. Harry even jumped on top of the piano as Tom began warming up. Danny follows closely behind as Tom began singing.

I never thought she'd remember

the way that I left her heart.

Didn't know I had it all

till the moment I lost it all,

picked from my mistakes and faults,

and she won't ever recover.

I couldn't get over

and I could never move on

and I'm trying to recall

from the day I made her fall

She was broken on the floor

I made her shatter.