The Advice Column I

Seventy-Nine

Advice Request
This person has never been their true self until this year. They're friends aren't accepting who they are.

Answered Submission
Okay, so you're saying you have been yourself for a long time, and now that you're tired of pretending to be a quiet girl, you're showing your true self. This isn't my kindest advice, but I'll be honest here since the truth to everything is valuable.

Flirting, shipping people, and talking about murder (I hope you're talking about murder in movies) is okay to a certain extent. But swearing isn't really right. Your words define who you are. The way you talk and the way you behave is what makes you the person you are. Now, I'm not saying that you're bad, but the goodness in people is shown through their actions and words. This should tell you something.

Honestly speaking, swearing is not cool at all, even for adults, and I don't think you do it because you think it's cool (as your friends claim). You have a sister, you said. Younger siblings usually look up to their older siblings, so you don't want her to think that her older sister is not very good at behaviour, do you, now? So, perhaps when you feel like cursing, try to hold it back for not only yourself but also for your sister.

Also, about your friends who tell you not to be yourself: tsk! They should be advising you instead of insulting you. Be yourself, but also work on bettering yourself. The better you are, the more you'll love yourself. If people aren't being nice to you, stay away from them. You have your cat, your nana, your sister, and, of course, your computer. Spend time with the people you love, and the people who love you. You say it's seen as weird when you talk with the opposite gender. I won't tell you stop hanging out with boys, nor will I encourage you to do it because this is something that is up to date and different across cultures. Ask yourself: Is it right? Do I get anything from hanging out with these people? Will I get in trouble if I do this? It depends on the society in which you live. See if what you do is helping you become a better person or not. If you can answer the above questions, you know what you have to do. Don't pressurize yourself by over thinking.

Never stop being yourself, and never stop working on yourself. You'll grow into a beautiful and independent woman one day, so make sure your future self will be proud of the decisions you make now.

With love,

The Advice Column Team