The Advice Column I

Twelve

Advice Request
This person likes a boy who may or may not like them back (they think they do, though). He's a bad boy which is something their parents don't like, but this person knows that deep down, this boy has a good personality.

Answered Submission
The truth is that many people reputed as bad people are actually good people deep down. Sometimes, they are only bad to keep their known image, and at other times, it's for a different reason. Try to find a way to learn about this guy as much as you can. You may be right, and he might be a good person on the inside, but at the same time, you might be wrong. Either way, you will have to train yourself to deal with these feelings in the meantime. On a similar note, if he truly is a good guy on the inside, then try to talk to your parents about it. Discuss how he is a good person on the inside, meaning he has the potential of being a good person on the outside too. If, case in point, it turns out that he isn't as good as you thought he was, then we suggest you don't even get near him. Is that hard to do? Of course it is, especially if you have feelings for him, but having a partner who's a morally good person is important because their actions may affect you a lot of the times. If he turns out to be a good person on the inside and your parents still aren't fond of him, then we suggest you don't do anything (like going out with him) behind your parents back. No matter what your cultural values are, it is never okay to create conflicts between you and your parents over someone else because for most people, conflicts between them and their parents never rests their hearts; were sure you want to be happy rather than stressed and frustrated over something like this. You can keep trying to work with them until they come to accept your feelings for him.

To see whether he likes you or not, establish a friendship with him to get to know him well. This will allow you to learn so much about him that you might realize you wouldn't want to be with him in a relationship! If you still feel like you would want to be in a relationship with him, then ask him out when the time is right, and if he rejected you, don't be discouraged! He might not be the right person for you, and you might find someone else for you.

With luck,

The Advice Column Team