Tutoring Mr. Bad Boy

Chapter 46: Overthinking Is The Suicide

"What am I supposed to do, hit my problems away?" I muttered.

He looked at me.

"Sorry," I mumbled. "Again."

I rose my left hand up, showing him the blue cast. "I can't exactly hit anything with this right now though."

"So just use your right hand," he shrugged.

"Are you sad?" he asked me.

"I don't know," I replied. "Maybe. All I know is I'm feeling something that's...not good."

"You've bottled up a whole lot of what's going on in your head Princess," he told me. "And the more you hold it in, that sadness fades and turns into anger."

I thought about what he said. Maybe he's not so wrong.

"So hit it," he said, holding the punching bad so it could be study.

I sighed and threw a weak punch at it.

"Come on Michaels, my sister can hit harder than that," he said.

And so I hit harder.

"Harder," he continued.

So I hit harder, and harder, and harder. And honestly it felt good. He was right. I was angry. Angry at myself, angry at Kyle, maybe a little at Shawn for some odd reason. Heck I was angry at the world.

"Just let everything go with each punch," he said. "All the anger, at yourself, me, Kyle, anyone, just direct it all on the bag."

I used all my strength to throw repeated blows. I may have gotten a bit out of control because he held my wrist to stop me at some point.

"Madness and chaos are self-destructing, but overthinking," he said looking at me. "Overthinking is the suicide."

I sniffled and he pulled me into a tight hug. I didn't even realise I was crying.

"Just...let it all out," he whispered.

I let the tears fall, letting everything out onto his chest.

"Are you okay?" he asked, one of us finally speaking.

I pulled away and wiped my face with my palms.

I shot him a weak smile and nodded. "I will be."

"Good," he said. "Now let's get out of here."

"Where to?" I asked.

He shrugged. "Wherever you want I guess. We can go back to my place, no one's home."

I nodded. "Sure."

"Maybe stop for some ice cream on the way."

I stared at him. "Why the hell would you want ice cream in this weather?"

He rolled his eyes. "Alright, we can order pizza or something. Just eat our problems away."

I laughed. A genuine one.

"Thanks," I said. "I needed all that."

"Ah well," he responded. "We all know I'm just that amazing. No need to thank me for it, really."

I rolled my eyes and smiled. "Just when I think you're becoming this sweet guy the ego maniac comes out again," I teased.

"You know you love me," he winked.

Oh trust me I do.

"In your dreams," I told him.

"Oh well I better get ready for bed then," he smirked.

I laughed. "Guess I walked right into that one."

"Yes you did Princess," he laughed and surprisingly threw his arm around my shoulder.

*********

"So, I gotta ask you something," he said.

I sipped the lemonade I had. We were currently on his couch eating a large pepperoni while watching a movie. "Sure."

"My dad's throwing a Christmas party this year. If you're not doing anything special that night you can stop by...if you want. I invited Liam and Jacob and the others too but I want you there as well."

I smiled. "I'd love to."

I could just spend the day with my family and the night at the party.

I decided to go home when we were done. I was tired.

"Hey look," Shawn chuckled when he looked out a window. "It's snowing."

"You still want to walk me home?" I asked. "We can just take your car."

"Alright," he agreed. "Car it is."

We got into his car and he drove me home.

"Thank you Shawn, for everything," I said when I got out.

He nodded. "Always here Princess."

I smiled and waved as he pulled out of the driveway and onto the street. I opened the door and got in.

"Oh hey sweetheart," my dad said. "Where have you been?"

He, mom and Emily were putting up Christmas decorations.

"I just went out for a jog and ran into a friend," I answered.

"Ehem, Shawn," Em fake coughed.

I rolled my eyes and went upstairs to my room. As soon as I hopped onto my bed my phone began to ring.

"Hey Shay."

"Remember that jacket I lent you?" she asked.

"You gotta be more specific," I told her.

"The brown leather one I bought at Forever 21," she said.

"Yeah, what about it?"

"You haven't given it back," she said. "I need it for my party. You are coming right? Hope you haven't forgotten or anything."

I forgot.

See, Shayley had been having this annual pre-Christmas party for the past two years. No one wants to wake up on Christmas morning with a hangover of some sort, so she has the party the day before Christmas Eve. A Christmas Eve Eve party if you may.

"Huh? Oh yeah, I'll be there," I assured her. "Besides didn't I return that jacket?"

"No you didn't."

"I'm pretty sure I did," I stated again.

"Well I can't find it. Can you at least go look in your closet real quick?" she asked.

I groaned and got up. If I still had it it had to be somewhere behind all my other clothes.

"I'm checking," I told her.

I pulled out my clothes, grabbing as many as I could at a time. I returned that jacket, I clearly wasn't finding it. Either that or I was too lazy to look harder.

"Oh...wow," I said when I recognized something I picked.

"You found it?" she chirped.

Oh, she was still there.

"What? No, not yet," I replied. "I'm telling you I gave it back, but if I do find it I'll get it to you."

She sighed. "Alright, I'll see you later then."

"Bye," I said before hanging up.

I stared at the jacket I held in my hands. Not Shayley's, Shawn's. I still had it. A small smile crept to my lips. He gave me this the first time we went out, for ice cream. I totally forgot I threw this in the back of my closet.

Being the girl I am I threw the jacket on. It felt so warm. After sitting on the floor in his jacket for a few minutes I took it off and placed it on the chair in front of my mirror.

I may be falling harder and faster for Shawn than I think. Question is, will he be there to catch me?