41 - Teddy bear

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I know ki chapters are getting a little emotional and serious but I want both Nimmi and Vikram show their Vulnerable sides, their insecurities and doubts with each other.

All I wish I is to not only write a story but show the real life emotions of a person. The good and bad of life that changes your perspective towards life.❤️❤️
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AUTHORS' POV

Everyone was waiting for Ranasa to speak . He thought for a while and started speaking. "He..hello everyone present here. We know MR Vikram Singh Chandravanshi here is quite witty with his humour", which just increases his urge to roll his eyes.

"It's true that Mr Chandravanshi will be the next king. I know that it's certain and unexpected. But this was planned long back. He is 3rd in the line for this throne. Being My wife and your Ranisa's cousins son. He belongs to the royal blood line.", Every single lie he was telling, it just increased the hate and disgust in Vikram towards him.

How this man was lying to the world so smoothly and that too without any hesitation. Before media could ask anything more, he descended the stairs giving an excuse that he's late, leaving the palace grounds. More like hightailed from there.

Saying a small clipped thank you, even Vikram left from there and towards his room.

Nimmi gestured Raghav to take care of the things while she left from there too. The moment she entered the room, it was a complete mess. The bedsheets were on the floor, anything that was taking space on dressing table was scattered, sofa was displaced, even the carpets was turned.

Nimmi's jaw dropped seeing all this. In just matter of few minutes, heturned the whole room upside down.Vikram saw a vase on a side table and instantly took it to throw and smash the mirror.

But before he could, Nimmi rushed and snatched it away. "Ram..", she gasped, her eyes full of tears to see him so much pain and suffering.

"Begum.. please, don't. Stay away from me right now. I don't want to do something and regret it.", he was angry, hurt but still managed to keep his voice to a decibel.

"NO!", her reply was firm and her eyes held a commitment. Knowing she won't step away he cursed under his breath, punched the bed post and left the room, walking towards the balcony.

His strong and hard outburst shook Nimmi completely. She stood still trying to compose herself for Vikram. Finally when she was calm enough she walked out to the balcony and say Vikram just standing near the pool and looking up in the sky, lost in thoughts.

Maybe he was looking for something, a sign, maybe an indication from Universe to answer his questions. Why? Why him? What did he ever do to deserve all this? Or maybe he wanted the god to take all this away and just give him some peace and heal him for once.

"You know, Healing can be hard when your inner child wants love. Your Teenage self wants revenge and your present self wants peace.", as if hearing his thoughts Nimmi said those words, giving him a satisfaction if not answers.

He turned to see his Begum, and when she looked at her husband it broke her heart. He was looking so broken, so empty, so weak. She couldn't control herself and wrapped him in her arms.

It felt like forever when they were hugging each other.

"I'm tired Begum.", his voice came out weak. "I'm tired of running, tired of waiting, I'm now tired of wanting a revenge.", Nimmi didn't stop him and wanted for him to finish. To let him get everything buried in him out.

"you are right, there was a time when I yearned for love, and later that feeling turned into revenge. I wanted to take revenge for the person who destroyed my mother. I wanted to make him feel the same pain that he made her feel. For years I was looking for the culprit of my mother. I knew I could never ask Nani because she wanted me to stay away from that horrible truth. But now that I've found him, I don't feel any of those. It's true that I'm angry, I can't stand him but this feeling of just leave everything and start new is getting stronger in me. But I can't do that, I feel like I'm cheating with my mother. I don't know what to do at this point."

By the time he finished his voice cracked and a lone tear escaped his eye. Nimmi looked up to see him. She wanted to make him believe that he is not wrong. That sometimes letting things go is okay.

If removing that person from your life forever brings happiness then it's not wrong. She had to be so strong for him that whatever she will say it gets straight to his heart and never leaves.
She had to something big for him to believe that he is not worthless in any way. That there is someone who loves him the most and can do anything for him.

That he will get peace. He will feel the love that he always wanted once this tsunami of sadness and despair is over. And then he will not be scared to love her back.

Yes, she was confident that her Ram loves her. Maybe more than she does him. But he needs to remove the dark clouds from his Herat and let the sunshine shine on him.

"Ram, will you give me something if I ask for it?", she asked innocently with hope in her eyes.

"Anything Begum", Vikram's thumb caressing her soft cheeks. This made her smile to fullest, "Nothing much, just one day for me, from your busy schedule, can you do that?", he leaned back looking her curiously.

"Kya Chal raha hai aapke dimaag main Begum?"(What's going inside your head?), his curiosity getting more and more high.

"Nothing you need to worry about", saying she stepped back showing her tongue and ran.

All Vikram's worries left as he ran to catch her. Nimmi was running circles around their pool. Vikram could catch her easily but he just wanted her to have some fun. He knew she was doing all these efforts just to make him happy.

"Itna gym karke six packs banane ka kya fayda. Jab mujhe bhi nahi pakad sakte. Aaye bade sports brand bechne wale. Aap se acchi toh main hoon. Bhaloo jaisi Begum hai, Aur khud Sher jaise ho. Phir bhi itni der se bhaage ja rahe ho." ( what's the use of gym and six packs when you can't even get to catch me. And you promote sports brand. Atleast I'm better than you. Look at me, I'm like a grizzly bear and you are a lion. Still can't catch me."

Nimmi was panting and laughing while she said all this. Her words didn't feel just like a casual joke. It felt something more, something that came from a corner of self doubts. He could compare because he had the same doubts. Even though the reasons were different.

And the way she said, it was clear that she had been triggered in many ways which led her to believe in things and choose the words that had been used for her in past.

Not that she was not confident or had doubted herself. But Vikram did feel that she had taken a lot of things from past and accepted them, as her part of life.

Like the word bear she used to describe herself, was something he did not like at all. For him she was like delicate flower that needed to be taken care of and never to be plucked, she was the ocean of feelings that he could dive into and drown himself completely, the fluffy teddy bear that was the fantasy of every child.

She was still laughing standing on the side when Vikram came out of his thoughts. Not liking what she said, he took long steps and before she knew Vikram held from her arm and turned her to face him.
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That's it for this chapter

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Vikram thinking what will Nimmi do..but thinking

but thinking

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