CAKE

Thirty-Five

Kathryn 

"You have to eat something," Casey mutters across from me. I pick my head up and glance at my fiance whose eyes were already on me. "Please," she begs, her eyes falling to my plate of food that I've been picking at since she set it down in front of me. Letting out a breath, I stab my eggs before forcing myself to eat.

Though the minute, I place the scrambled eggs on my tongue, I feel the sudden urge to throw up. Dropping my fork, I grab my fiance's attention. I don't waste any time as I jump up from my seat and run into the kitchen, leaning over the sink as I dry heave. 

Sweat beads form on my forehead as an acidic burn climbs up my throat. Quickly, I throw up my dinner from yesterday evening. Tears burn my eyes as the onslaught continues. Casey pulls my hair from my face as she rubs my back. "It's okay, I'm here," she mutters softly, soothingly as I cry.

I push myself away from the sink once I'm done. Sniffing, I turn to my fiance. "But Hope isn't," I spit as I wipe my lips. I watch the woman's eyes fall to the floor at my words. "Hope isn't here Casey, so it's not okay!"

I wipe my eyes and lean against the counter. "I'm never going to be okay again."

"Don't talk like that, you're just hurting right now," the brown-skinned woman spits, her eyes snapping to me. We continue to look at each other until there's a knock at our door. Casey sighs, glancing out the kitchen, probably hoping that whoever it was, would leave, or at least that's what I was wishing for.

I sniff and force myself out of the kitchen, my younger companion following me as I make my way to the bedroom. "I'm going back to bed," I spit, not in the mood to do anything. "You can't stay in bed all day, Ryn. I understand being depressed and grieving but staying in bed isn't going to help you process this," my fiance spits.

Rolling my eyes, I glance at her. 

"How about you go see who's at the door and leave me alone. I'm not in the mood to be bothered," I spit, pushing her out of the room and closing the door in her face. Sighing and feeling slightly terrible, I make my way to the bed, removing my clothes before diving under the duvet as I hear Casey open the front door.

I throw the duvet over my head and curl into a ball, knowing it wouldn't take much longer for the tears to come back. I'd rather be dead than feel this way. I feel so helpless and hopeless and destroyed. How does anyone expect me to move on from this? 

My eyes widen as the blanket is pulled away from my body. I frown as blue eyes meet mine. The blonde tilts her head as she eyes me. "You look like shit," Emily smiles softly. I can only groan and reach for the blanket. To my dismay, the woman pulls the duvet further from my reach. "Em, I'm not in the mood," I hiss.

"I can see that. Casey let us in, and said you were staying in." 

I clench my jaw and glance over, spotting Casey in the doorway with Sophia. "C'mon get up." I groan, curling back into a ball. "I'm really not in the mood for company," I spit, hoping this time she'd listen to my wishes. However, she does not. "Too bad, we're here and it's rude to leave your guest without entertainment."

Realizing I wouldn't be left alone, I force myself out of bed to get dressed. Emily smiles at me as she throws the blanket back onto the bed, following me into the living room. "Diana and Cane should be on the way," the blonde spits causing me to eye her in confusion. 

"We thought you'd need some company to feel a little less shitty today. In other words, we're a distraction." Rolling my eyes, I plop down onto the couch, annoyed. "Do you two want anything to drink or eat? Ryn couldn't finish her food so we have more than expected," my brown-skinned lover spits. Sophia's brown eyes land on me. "Couldn't or wouldn't?" she questions.