I Hoped You Weren't Alive At Times ✓

Ch 99

15.7 The Empress Hates The Emperor (1)
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When Lilian cried, Karloi entered the bedroom with an urgent face. As he held Lilian in his arms, who couldn't even control her body, his chest quickly got wet. Her pain was felt through his skin, through his body, and he gnawed at his teeth.

"What did I do wrong? Why do I have to go through this?"

The shaking body calmed down, and the crying voice murmured. Karloi shook his head vigorously at the words.

"It's not your fault. That's all... It's all my fault."

Lilian, who didn't answer after hearing that, raised her head in his arms and pushed him slightly away.

"Yes, I shouldn't have met you in the first place."

Lilian murmured with an unfamiliar look. She's looking at him, but she doesn't seem like she is.

"Whatever happens to you, I shouldn't have cared."

"...Lou."

Lilian's expression turned fierce on the name he managed to bring up.

"You."

Now she didn't even call his name. One short word contained countless emotions, and Karloi easily recognized that most of them were hatred for him, and that they were eventually different names of hatred.

"Don't call me by that name."

There was so much hatred in her every word. It was painful that he couldn't even say anything as she blamed him and that he was half-mixed with tears. He felt like holding a knife in his hand. Let her stab him however she wants.

"Don't call me that. Don't say the name my mother used to call me."

Karloi couldn't answer back at all. It was disastrous that that was the worst thing she could say. She can't curse at least. She can't even tell him to die.

It was not long before Lilian turned her head. From him.

"...Get out."

A dry request has fallen.

"It's painful to see your face."

After hearing that, Karloi couldn't stay in the bedroom. Because he had already caused Lilian so much pain.

As soon as he left the bedroom, he heard Lilian crying faintly again. Karloi collapsed at the door and covered his face. He heard all the sounds, unable to move even the slightest bit from the door. A weak, unstoppable cry.

He lived by forcefully grabbing his life, which no one wanted, and he became Lilian's torment. He owes her a life, and that's all he has become. It was to be that woman's pain.

(What did I do wrong?)

He thought about those words again as he heard Lilian's cry. His presence was her fault. It would have been better if it had been a useless life.

Karloi smirked uncontrollably.

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"I don't even want to return to the government anymore. And I don't need medicine."

Even after seeing Alexis Dunya's face, Karloi did not feel guilty that Alexis had barely made time at dawn. He knows she's doing what she has to do, but strangely enough, he had no idea.

"...What do you do if you don't have to go back to politics or take medicine?"

Pure curiosity, Alexis distorted her face as if she had heard the stupidest question in the world.