good day and trypophobia ??

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bad news first -

i deadass think i had trypophobia
i came home today and picked up the remote to watch tv but i was legit scared to pick up the remote bc it had stuff on the back of it and i thought it was food, spit whtever. THEN I REALIZED SOMEHING HAPPENED TO THE BACK OF THE REMOTE AND I STILL DK WHAT IT IS.

here's the picture ( TRIGGER WARNING )

here's the picture ( TRIGGER WARNING )

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WHAT THE HELL IS THAT I DONT KNOW

ITS LIKE APART OF THE REMOTE IDK MAYBE WATER SOAKED INTO IT I DONT FUCKING KNOW IT IS DISGUSTING

anyway after looking at it for too long i started getting goosebumps and feeling really sick like i thought i was gonna fookin pass out !! and i still have a very tingly feeling in my body that started when i looked at that and i am literally so shaken and disgusted by the back of the remote so i looked up trypophobia ( phobia of patterns, lesions and certain holes )

and it p much describes it but i dead ass started CRYING when i googled images bc i've seen them before and they're literally the most fucking disgusting things i can't

on the other hand - -
today i had such a nice day !! i woke up rlly not wanting to go to school but i kinda have to if i wna keep my grades up so i pushed through. and i just had such a nice day like idk whyyy.

but yesterday in spanish class i was sitting next to this cute white boy who always sort of smiles / "smirks" at me whenever we see each other because ( long story ) anyway. i left my coat behind and he goes "zuzu!" i'm like "what?" he throws me my coat and he goes "it's cold outside , i don't want you to be cold." and that was like the best thing i was just cheesin as heck.

anyway then today i was talking to carlos and i was like "so carlos how exactly did you meet my aunt?" and he told me how and i was like a lost puppy all over him ( like following him ) and he was smiling and everything and i was like "yeah?" shit like that. lmao and i was so uncomfortable in the lunch line bc he was behind me and breathING DOWN MY NECK i was so ugh.

anyway when i sat back down my friend sitting next to me that day was like "ooh i see you and carlos." ( she knows our "history" ) and i'm like "lol wut we were jus havin a normal conversation."

and she goes "yeah ik but you were flirting with him."

of course i was like "ew no."

and then her friends ( who are sorta my friends ) behind her were like "haha yeah you were."

bla bla bla and i was like o shit maybe i wAS FLIRTING because i feel like i'm the type of person to absentmindedly flirt with somebody and not notice it LMAO that's so embarrassing though oh god !! but all i was doing was asking him how he met my aunt idk ?? i bet you it's those big eyes and curly lashes workin on him ;) ;) (( i'm jk but i do have curly lashes and big eyes ))

but on the downside there's this guy in my spanish class and i think he thinks i like him because he's one of those people that thinks you're staring at him BUT I'M ACTUALLY LOOKING AT THE BOARD AND NOT HIM LMAOAO. anyway today he like stared at me bc i was staring at the board but he was clearly staring at me thinking that i was staring at him and he's done that before and it literally makes me SO uncomfortable.

and like i really don't like being mean lmao but i looked straight at him and if you could spell bitch on your face, that's exactly what my face spelled heh.

anywayyy i had SUCH a great day and the day isn't over yet !! but really though i'm just loving this weather and my grades keep going up, up, up and i'm just so excited because for once i feel prepared in life for a math quiz and just yes !!

and my mom and i made a pact that if i do all my kumon ( outside of school math packets ) every week then i can get $15 and save up at the end of the month to get my hurr done and i also get to go out to eat w her in between kumon & my one on one tutor

last week i did ihop and got chicken n waffles and the week before that i did uno's and got some chicken brocolli alfredo yum yum !!

ALSO GO READ MY GIRL boston-5sos_fam RANT BOOK she's such a QT n she's woke and i lUV HER !!

how did you guys' days go !!

OMG PS I'M LEARNING MORE ITALIAN IT'S SO FUN NOW I'M 5% FLUENT !!
#zuzaf
 

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