Soraru x Mafumafu

A Part Of Me, From Me To You - Chapter 8

Warning: This is an AU fan fiction. First person perspective. Appearances of mob characters may occur occasionally.

A sequel to "A Little Bit Of You, A Little Bit Of Me".

Unhealthy contents. Filled with only the bad stuffs. An R-18 series.

Please proceed with caution.

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Never had I seen Soraru-san like that before.

Weak, helpless, incapable, scared, broken.

Those weren't words used to describe who and what Soraru-san was. But after the incident tonight, even though he didn't show it in front of the others, he was feeling those emotions that he shouldn't have, those emotions that I had forced him to feel because of my foolishness.

Because of that, there were a lot of things that had come into mind after tonight, after what he and I had done in the bath area.

As his partner and lover, I was happy to know how much he felt for me, how important my existence was to him. The fact that he couldn't live without me, once again, made me feel that I wasn't the only one who was constantly falling in love with him over, and over again all these years; that I was being cherished by someone like I had always hoped; that I was special.

But it was also exactly because he was as important to me that I was wrong for making him feel that way.

I was now nothing but a thorn by his side. A weakness that other bad men could use against him, to cause him possible harm. Even though I was often not included in the work Soraru-san does, I knew how bad this could influence him and the clan; anyone would in this situation, to be honest.

Kashitarou-san said this all the time, that anyone who sees me and Soraru-san together would know that Soraru-san had found someone important to him, but he never continued from there and would always have this troubled smile on. I always thought he was just troubled by the fact that Soraru-san sometimes does embarrassing things in the public area at home, but I now knew perfectly well that that wasn't the case.

The way Soraru-san trembled as he held me in his arms broke my heart, and at the same time, showered me with love and happiness at the reminder of being treasured. I buried my face into his chest and cried.

They weren't tears of happiness but of guilt.

He cradled me in his arms, and kissed me on the top of my head again and again but it didn't help make me feel any better, only building the guilt inside of me. I tightened my arms around him back then and sobbed, pressing my voice down, not daring to make another sound after that. He hugged me back with equal desperation, not knowing what he could do to comfort me.

So he waited, and waited until I stopped crying.

We didn't say a thing to each other after that. Once I had calmed down, Soraru-san moved away from me reluctantly before he walked over to the door to open it, and Kashitarou-san and Nqrse-kun were already there to receive orders from him. He said something to the both of them, and then came back to me.

"Can you walk?" Soraru-san asked. His voice was so soft and gentle, I could feel tears stinging my eyes again.

I shook my head at him to answer his question.

"I'll carry you back to your room then," he said, ready to scoop me back into his arms.

I jerked back on reflex, not wanting him to touch me. He was stunned by my reaction, and I didn't dare look at his face at first, but I did and I regretted it deeply when I saw the pain in his eyes, not expecting me to reject him. I couldn't hold his gaze with mine at all. I quickly turned my head away and tried to get off the counter to stand on my own feet. I could see at the corner of my eyes that Soraru-san wanted to help, but he didn't dare get too close.