Kpop imagines♡

Lim Jaebeom (JB) (GOT7) imagine 2

My feet against the cold surface of the scale in the bathroom, following the number anxious as it finally set down on its final number. 52 kg. My gaze darkened at the shameful number and i quickly stepped off the scale to forget it again but it was already burned into my brain. 52 kg. 52. Thats still too much. How will i even be able to weight just as much as all these skinny idols all the people in the internet were comparing me with? Will i ever be enough?

I quickly put on a new shirt and pants for the day after the shower i took this morning and headed to my kitchen. Ever since i moved out of my parents home 8 months ago, everything changed. Some would say its the hateful comments on the internet about me shading being got7 jaebums girlfriend after it leaked, and they were true, but my mind was the major problem. I would read death threats against me, bodyshaming comments, comments comparing me to other female idols which they thought would fit more to jb. Everything. And it hurts.

So since i moved in to my own appartment, i decided to change for good. No parental controle. No forced food. No fake compliments. Just my own. I started eating less and less and somehow my dayly life now contains mostly of just an apple and a sweetpotato a day. I could feel that i was less energetic than i usually was and i knew that all these hateful thoughts about myself kept coming up again and again and soon took over my whole lifestlye. I knew it. But could i change it? Probably not alone.

When i looked at the mirror or pictures friends had taken of me, all i wanted to do was vomiting. I looked disguisting. Thats what i always thought after reading so much negative about me. And i got it. I wasnt exactly a skinny legend like all the idols but i still had feelings. I still was a human.

Today Jaebum wanted to come by and spend some time with me since he was on tour the last three months in america. I missed him so unbelievable much. All the calls and videochats we did was nothing compared to my excitement of seeing my boyfriend for so long again. I tried to push all these negative thoughts away for the day but i knew they would catch me now or later.

When i started to cook the meal i prepared to do for Jaebum and currently chopped the onions, i suddenly felt two strong arms around me and a well known scent, i missed so much. "Im home baby." he whispered and in total surprise i dropped the knife and turned around so fast in his touch that our faces were just centimeters away from each other.

I let out a small scream and literally fell into his arms. "Jaebum! Oh my gosh dont scare me like that! I thought you were a serial killer." i laughed pressing his body all against mine just to feel his closeness since i couldnt be with him in a long time. His hands automatically wandered around my waist under my shirt just to feel his skin on my bare skin. It was all i ever needed.

I could feel tears wailing up inside me and before i could even say something else, i was already a sobbing mess in my boyfriends arms. His comforting hug and hands carressed my back and my face and in addition he pressed small kisses onto my cheek. "shh babe its fine. We're together again. Dont worry. I missed you so much y/n." hearing his voice just let me forget everything and put me into a spell, i never want to be free of.

I nodded seeing that adorable smile of his decorating his perfect face. I couldnt help but smile back at him and feel the love rosing inside of me and my heart swelling. His thumbs carefully stroked the tears away and my hands softly cupped his face. And not long after, our lips gently touched each other and let a firework inside of me explode. I never felt this good, this whole in these last months. And thats just because of Jaebum.

"Its just the onions" i joked laughing slightly as we parted and leaned my head against the crook of his neck. Jb laughed lightly and hugged me even more. We stayed like this a ehile longer to just enjoy each others company. But he quickly called me back to reality with his words of being totally true.