gay house BTSxBTS

53

"I thought you loved me though" his voice was weighed down with sadness.

I still refused to look at him.

"I'm so sorry" I mumbled. I feel disgusting. "it just- it just happened. I'm sorry. I love him though"

I felt my words becoming heavier to carry. The knot in my throat began to sting. I couldn't talk well.

I really love Kim Taehyung. It's stupid to stay, especially after only a month. I know it's too soon to say things like this. It's also something I feel confident about though. I mean, I'm quite literally locked in a house with him 24/7. A month in this case seems like enough time to fall.

"He's 16" he spat.

"It's only two years apart... i'm sorry. I didn't think it would be like this"

I kept apologizing. It really shouldn't have ended up like this, I know that. Yet it did, and I wouldn't take it back.

"If you really were you wouldnt have fallen for someone else"

"I'm sorry" I said again.

This time the tears really did begin to fall. No more threats. I closed my eyes and wished I didn't let this happen.

Namjoon stayed silent. No more arguing. We both stayed like this for a while. On two different beds while facing each other. He let me have the time to gather myself before shooting bullets my way.

I sighed as I looked up at the ceiling. Fanning my eyes to dry them up, but it obviously didn't help.

Without looking at him, I opened the nightstand drawer. Grabbing a few tissues from the box, and wiping my tears.

Each of our rooms is set up like that. The nightstand drawer has tissues, a basic first aid kid, as well as batteries for our lamps. However, I didn't realize Namjoon used his nightstand to store things. Mine and Yoongi's just has both the books we're reading along with the other items.

Inside his was two bundles of letters. The first one was addressed "Dearest Kim Nam Joon" with a kiss printed in pink gloss.

"What are these?" i asked. Picking them up, I took the band off of them.

I shuffled through them. Each one was addressed the same with the same stain. Messy hangul and pink gloss stains.

"They're from my mother" he sighed, reaching out to take them from me.

He's such a softy at times. That makes my heart ache even more. Knowing I'm leaving him after all these years. However, the ache is small. My heart still yearns for Kim Taehyung.

I smiled down at the letters nonetheless. I felt myself become overwhelmed with emotions again. I ran my thumb across his name. Reminiscing the time he did pay attention to me and the times he was overly sweet. Yet as soon as a single tear of mine fell onto the paper, Namjoon went to snatch the letters away.

I let him take all but one. I should have just let him take them all, but I held onto that one with a death grip. It was addressed to him a few weeks after we began seeing each other back in middle school. I wondered whether his mom knew about us then. How she thought of us then, especially now knowing she doesn't approve.

I know it wasn't my right to be snoopy, but when I pulled it out, he did nothing to protest.

"Dearest Kim Namjoon,
Hi love. You looked handsome yesterday. The date was really fun! Even though if was just dinner, I had a great time. I wish my dad wasn't getting transferred to England. I'll miss you, love-" i stopped there.

"Your mother wrote these?" I quirked a brow. Finally looking at him throw my puffy eyes.

His cheeks were red.

"Let me see the newest one" I demanded. Holding my hand out for him to hand it over.

He hesitated, but did. Clearing his throat and shakily giving it to me.

January 12th. one year to the day after we began to date.

"Dearest Kim Namjoon,
I love you. Is that sudden? Middle school's rough lol. Anyways, I know the distance is far. My dad said we'll be coming back when you and I are juniors. I know it's a long time to wait for me, so you don't have to. Maybe I can convince him to let me visit from time to time. Still, as always, I love you.
Anyways, love from Britain,
Lisa"

This asshole doesn't deserve my tears. That was the only thought that ran through my mind.

"You started dating me while you were with someone else?" I questioned.

Although, I clearly knew the answer. The proof was in these letters. I wanted to hear it come from him though. I needed to hear it come from his own mouth.

"My parents set us up. I stopped talking to her once you and i got serious"

My grip on the letter tightened. Soon it was nothing but a crumpled up piece of paper in my fist. I felt it cut into my skin even, but I had no time to tend to a paper cut. It wasn't what I cared for right now.

"The point is that you still cheated on me for over a year with a fucking girl." i fell silent as I clenched my jaw. "T-then I guess we're even" i said.

I realized quickly, I had no right to be angry. Yes he technically cheated, but I did too. Yes, one month definitely isn't twelve, but the fact that I had done it all was what made it wrong. In the end, i didn't prove to be any better than him. In the end, I can't be angry.

"But I didn't end up falling for her like you did with him. I chose you. I loved you. You chose to get fucked by a kid whore rather than to continue to love me. I'm only in the damned house because of you. I loved you Kim Seokjin" he raised his voice at me.

I stayed quiet a moment. Letting his nonsense sink in a bit. Debating whether or not my previous thought still stands. But then, i realized it doesn't.

Screw not being angry, i thought.

I will never let anyone talk down to me. Not when their bark is worse than their bite. Not when they rely on manipulation to evoke emotion. Not when they're just about the same as I am. Not when they call my man a whore.

"Taehyung isn't a kid or a whore. And I don't care if you didn't love her, you still were with her and you still let her openly love you. We're even and we're definitely over"

With that, I calmly stood and walked out the door. Rolling my eyes when all 4 of the others fell forward at my feet. Instead. I simply grabbed Taehyung from the bunch, and helped him to his feet.

"Let's go watch a movie together- as a couple" I smiled.

-

Second a/n

How pissed are you lmao
Thoughts??
@ namjoon??
Jin??
Tae??