Can't hate you || e.d

Freedom

He left and I went down to the kitchen and finally ate the breakfast that Miranda has cooked for me. While I was eating I couldn't forget about what happened upstairs. His hand on my throat.. the way he looked at me and his close he was..

And as I heard him coming in I realized again that I spend a whole fucking hour with thinking about him. "Are you ready?" he asked me and I nodded quickly...
We got in his car and I told him where I was living because I decided to take it real.. Of course I looked around during the ride so I could know where he was living. I didn't even know this part of the west coast.. It seemed hidden very well.. Definitely on purpose.. I was drowning in my thoughts yesterday so I couldn't recognize anything.

As we arrived he warned me.
"Don't you even think about running away or escaping." I rolled my eyes. "I will find you. no matter where you go.." he added and I looked at the building that I once used to call home. It felt like I've been gone for more than one night. It already felt like I didn't belong here.. probably because I didn't. This all wasn't me..

He grabbed my face and squeezed it to make me look at him..
"I'll be here waiting for you. You have twenty minutes." I freed my face and said "Don't worry. I'd rather to stay with you instead of staying with my mom." then I got off the car.

I entered in and mom was at home...
I tried to rush upstairs to my room quietly hoping she wouldn't hear me.. but she caught me. Of course she didn't know about anything that happened. She must've thought I got drunk, fell asleep somewhere and came back now even tho I've never done that before.

"Y/n? Where have you been? I was so worried! Charlie brought your bag! Don't go-"
"OKAY MOM!" I ripped my bag out off her hand and ran upstairs because I couldn't believe her words.. she was worried? All shew was worried about were the paparazzis.. she was only scared that I've done something bad and anybody has seem me. She wasn't caring about me at all..

She followed me. I grabbed a bigger bag and put everything in it. Everything that I needed. My phone, charger, laptop, money, credit cards, keys, headphones, make up and passport.

"What are you doing?" she asked me very angry and panicking. this was probably her biggest nightmare but it was obvious that it was going to happen.. I didn't answer and put a jacket on since it was very cold outside today.
"Oh no young lady. You're NOT GOING ANYWHERE!"

I looked at her out of breath. I knew I should be angry at her but I felt bad for her.. she was a lonely woman.. with no heart.. she was never going to be happy.. she was never going to understand.. she was always going to be an awful person with a disgusting character. She didn't have the chance to be happy.. but I did.. my chance was waiting outside and as long as I had this chance.. I wasn't going to stay here.

"I'm sorry mom."

Ethan didn't know me. he didn't know anything about me or my past or what a weak girl I've been. That I was or had to be perfect, that I was one of these popular glam girls, that my boyfriend cheated on me.. he didn't know anything.. I could start all over again..

I rushed past her and she followed me again.
"YOU CAN'T JUST LEAVE ME, LIKE YOUR DAD DID IT!" I froze as she said that when I already reached the door.
I looked at her but she wasn't even sad. She was just angry. And that made me angry. how could she say that? How could she compare me to him so easily like I wasn't hurt..?

"Just tell me with who you're going and where!" I shook my head.
"I'm leaving.. with my boyfriend.. I'm sorry." I opened the door and heard her screaming.
"Y/N I'LL CALL THE POLICE! YOU'RE STILL UNDERAGE!" I ran and she ran after me but I got in the car and screamed "HURRY UP! DRIVE!" he turned the engine on and drove. I looked back and she was standing there screaming. She was definitely crazy.

The adrenaline in my body was going to kill me. My heart was racing so fast I almost got a heart attack and I was hyperventilating.

I took a deep breath and checked my bag. He laughed. "What was that?"
"Don't ask. She's crazy." I laughed too and as I said that he laughed louder. The adrenaline felt so good.. being free felt so good.. it was the best feeling ever.. I started asking myself why I haven't done this before.. I felt like I could do anything in that moment.

I really wouldn't resist being with him if my life would be like this everyday.

"That was sick!" he said laughing. Of course he didn't expect to see a crazy woman running after me. And I don't know why but it was funny so I laughed too. We looked at each other and I made a wrong move..

I grabbed his face and kissed him. As I backed off he looked at me eyes widened and I did the same. I held my breath and looked at him totally scared..
Even tho he was driving he grabbed my face and kissed me back... The fact that he could drive without looking at the road was extremely dangerous but it turned me on and I wasn't really complaining.
Making out and driving. Nice.

I don't know but.. even if I hated him.. he had something that kept me coming back to him. I didn't even want to get rid of him. We didn't had to love each other. Just having fun and being free would be enough..