pricked » yoonmin [FF]

t h i r t y - n i n e

Tbh i cried writing this chapter

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The broken heart inside of him races way too fast, his whole chest is burning and hurting so much, breathing suddenly seems like something from a different planet and every breath fells like a stab in his heart. It's so painful. It's so fucking painful. And it's not fair.
This all is not fair. The whole world is not fair.

Nothing makes sense to Yoongi anymore, everything seems like a huge nightmare. He hopes to wake up soon, to wake up next to Donghyuk like the morning before and to smile at him while he smiles back happily, then go eating with him, enjoy their time, laugh, kiss, cuddle and these things. This nightmare has to come to an end so that Yoongi will wake up next to Donghyuk, next to a healthy Donghyuk.

Yoongi's eyes are full of tears which are about to fall down his cheek but he shakes his head, "T-that.. that's not true, right..?"

Donghyuk shakes his head, tears starting to roll down his cheeks, "I-it is true."

Without noticing the tears start falling, "W-why..? H-how?"

His whole body feels numb, his heart so broken like it had never been before. He feels so much and nothing at the same time, he really wants to wake up from this nightmare.
It can't be true.

Why is this world so cruel? Why does it want to take away such a wonderful human being? Why him? Why Donghyuk? He has never done something bad, he is so wonderful, his soul is so beautiful. Why him?

He is an angel - that's why. And now they want him back.

"I-it doesn't matter anymore." Donghyuk whispers, wiping away the tears on his cheek, tears he shed so many times after he found out about his sickness.
After he found out he won't be able to live any longer.

"I-it does matter to me!" Yoongi says, his voice cracking due to all of the emotions he has right now, all the pain that's growing in his chest, slowly taking over his whole body.

Once again the younger shakes his head, looking down at his feet while Yoongi's hands rest on his shoulder, "That's.. why I didn't want- to tell you."

"Y-you.. you wanted to- leave without tell me that you- that you.." Yoongi couldn't manage to end his sentence, tears falling uncontrollably, causing him to take a step back and to wipe them away.

"I.. I wanted to protect you." Donghyuk responds, his voice sounding like a whisper to Yoongi.

"That's not a reason." The older says, "I- We.. we can make it- together-"

"N-no." Donghyuk interrupts, "I don't want you to destroy your life.. because of me."

"W-what? I don't care about me, I want you-" Yoongi says but Donghyuk interrupts him once again.

"H-hyung no just leave it. I.. I made- my desicion. You can't change my mind."

Yoongi just stares at him in disbelief, while the pain in his chest makes his body feel numb. It feels like someone grabbed his heart and ripped it out of his chest, leaving a big wound and later - an even bigger scar will remain.

"I-I have to g-go now.." Donghyuk then adds, looking down at the floor not daring to see the sad eyes of the boy he loves. He can't look at him, the desperate expression in his face, the teary eyes, his eyes which always got him so weak. Yoongi's beautiful face shouldn't have this expression on it.

Donghyuk only wants to see the happy, smiling Hyung when he remembers him. He only wants to see his smile when he closes his eyes, not the wet cheeks, he wants to remember the shine in Yoongi's eyes, it always reminded Donghyuk of beautiful Christmas lights. There should always be these lights in his eyes, not tears.

His memory of Yoongi should be happy, so that it will make him smile, he doesn't want to see a sad and crying Yoongi. Only the happy Hyung he knows.

So he doesn't look up.
Not even when Yoongi grabbed his hands, holding them as if his life depends on it. The touch feels warm and safe, but that's not supposed to happen that's not how it should be like. Fate has other plans.

"P-please don't go, Donghyuk I- p-please don't go without me." Yoongi whispers, while trying to look in Donghyuk's eyes, "I-I need you."

He takes a step closer, there chests almost touching when Yoongi leans his forehead against Donghyuk's, closing his eyes.

Donghyuk closes his eyes again, tears slowly rolling down his cheeks, while he tries to enjoy his last moment with Yoongi even if it's so hard to enjoy it.
The last thing he wants to do is to leave the older. But he has no other choice.

In America they will try to heal him with Chemotherapy, even though the chances are small.
His grandmother had lung cancer, his father too, and now it's him.

After a few seconds he pushes the older slowly away, shaking his head, "I-I have to leave now."

A cracked sound leaves Yoongi mouth, a quiet sob that sounded so painful for Donghyuk his heart started hurting even more.

"T-thank you for everything- for.. for all the beautiful memories, thank you for being a part of my life, I-I .. I lov- I-" Donghyuk can't manage to say it out loud. He just can't.

"G-goodbye." After freeing himself from Yoongi's hands, he takes a few steps back, leaving the apartment, while Yoongi just stands there, frozen in his movements, frozen in time.

And then he leaves. Leaving and taking Yoongi's heart with him.

Finally getting back to reality, Yoongi rushes out of the apartment to follow Donghyuk.

"W-wait!" The older shouts when he noticed the younger, who was heading to his car.
Yoongi manages to grab his arm before Donghyuk enters the white car.

"D-donghyuk please don't-" Yoongi can't finish his sentence as Donghyuk suddenly pressed his lips on Yoongi's, for a short but intensive kiss, too short for the older.

"I-I love you, Hyung.", he whispered.

And then he left.

Just like he came into Yoongi's life, he left it. Suddenly, without any warnings.

And Yoongi will never be able to say these words back.

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A/N:

Vote bc it's my birthday. KIDDING GUYS I'M NOT LIKE THIS USUALLY but it's really my bday lmao