Soraru x Mafumafu

Goodbye- Extra Chapter 1

At that time, Mafu just sat on the couch and sobbed quietly. He felt pressure on the seat next to his but he did not turn to look to the side to see who it was.

"Soraru-san left, didn't he?" Kashitarou asked after a while, holding his hands together as he leaned forward, resting his arms on both his thighs.

Mafu could not say anything even if he wanted to. His voice was long gone after crying in the rain for what seemed like forever as he tried to accept reality.

Taking Mafu's silence as a 'yes', Kashitarou continued, "Remember how I said you smelled like him? And that it was because he left a mark on you? Were you aware of it?" he asked, his tone soft and gentle, as if he was talking to a child, being really careful with his words and intonation.

Mafu moved his head from the left to the right, realising that he was shaking his head as a response to Kashitarou. He felt Kashitarou's hand on his left shoulder and then a force which pulled him into Kashitarou's chest. Kashitarou was really warm, or was it Mafu who was cold, he did not know, but the warmth Kashitarou was giving him at that moment made Mafu feel like letting it out as emotions started welling up inside of him again. He felt Kashitarou's fingers on his neck, making him wince at the sudden contact with one of his sensitive areas of his body.

"It's right here," he said softly, being careful as he traced the mark on Mafu's neck, with no intention of seducing him, of course. He was just innocently trying to show him where Soraru left it on him. Mafu felt safe with Kashitarou, a different kind of sense of security he got from Soraru. Kashitarou felt like a big brother to him, just like how Amatsuki was to him. He now understood why Amatsuki fell for the man. "Do you want to know how it looks like?"

Mafu nodded.

"You know how Soraru-san's tree always bloomed the prettiest amongst the all? The mark looks exactly like that," Kashitarou smiled, still staring at the mark. "It's a cherry blossom flower, and it's beautiful,"

It was the only thing Soraru left for him.

"I tried asking Kashitarou-san to ask Soraru-san about it," taking another sip of cola, Amatsuki said. "But Kashitarou-san said that it was against a spirit's privacy! I don't get why it should be kept as a secret!"

Mafu, with his face down, staring at the cup of coffee he got from Amatsuki, opened his mouth and said, "You wouldn't want yours to be known by other people too, right?" he chuckled as he saw Amatsuki blush at his question.

"But I wanted you to at least know what it meant, Mafu-kun,"

"I know, but it's okay," Mafu nodded at him with gratitude. He knew Amatsuki was trying to help but he could not keep relying on him forever. Soraru told him to not cause too much trouble for him, and he did. For the past four years, he properly took care of his health by visiting the doctor monthly; he cooked his own meal and made sure that the nutrients in every one of them was sufficient for him; he gave his body enough rest and did not push it to its limits, unlike back then. Just like what Soraru asked him for, he did as he was told. "It's fine since he left me something,"

But the one thing that he could not do was forget about him. It was unpreventable for Mafu to wait for him. He told himself to not wait anymore, but some part in him held hope when spring came. He told him to be happy, but he could not. Not when he was not by his side. The beginning of everything was torture. He cried himself to sleep every night as he recalled about that day. He could not bring himself outside of the house because he did not have the energy to since they were all spent on crying.

And yet, he stood up. It was not that Soraru was gone, as in not dead, but he was somewhere far away. He tried thinking about it in a more positive way, which helped him a lot. 'If Soraru-san is up and running, then I should too,', 'I don't want to disappoint him,', and the one that pops up into his mind the most was, 'I want to show him the present me one day,'