Control ~Levi x Reader~ {Modern AU}

56

Y/N POV

It was late in the evening. 

We put Pepino in his crate and we were headed off to our bed so that we can relax and go on off to bed. 

Maybe I should talk to Levi about what I wanted to earlier.

Maybe not about the girl, but talking about Jean. 

We were both already dressed and going to lay in bed.

We got under the covers and it was silent. 

That was until I spoke up.

"Hey Levi." I said. 

"Hm?" He acknowledged. 

"I wanted to talk to you about a few days ago. Specifically about Jean I-" He cut me off. 

"Y/N if this is going to result in an argument I don't want to have this conversation. If you are trying to convince me to change my mind I am also not having that conversation." He said. He didn't sound frustrated. 

He just sounded tired and not willing to have that argument. 

"No no, I didn't want to convince you to change your mind at all. I don't want to argue either. I really just want to talk. Now that we're both calmer and have had some time away. I accept that you don't want me around him. But I'm a little confused as to why you don't want me to. Is it like an insecurity that you think I'm going to end up going to him? I mean we're married and I won't leave you." I said to him as we were facing each other as we laid down. 

He let out a sigh. 

"Y/N, that isn't the case. I can accept you having guy friends. I'm not scared you'll end up leaving. I mean hey if you leave I can bring in the next girl." He chuckled. 

"Hey!" I complained. 

He sat up and I sat up with him.

"I'm kidding. Anyway, I'm not scared of you leaving or anything. I just don't like the fact that you can still have your ex who you still dream about running away with. Along with not knowing his true intentions as well. As much as you don't want to admit it, you are easily influenced and are easily entertained, which tends to worry me sometimes. That's what picks at me." He said to me while looking at me. 

He still looked like he was holding back something from me though. 

"You seem like you have more to say Levi. Please say it." I said as I hugged him. 

"It's not important. We should sleep." He said as he hugged me back. 

"You always say its not important. I would hope you open up more to me. I want to be someone you confide in." I said with my head in the crook of his neck. 

"It really isn't important though." He said sounding tired. 

Do I want to take my chances and ask him about the girl? 

Is right now really appropriate to do so? 

I mean it can get him talking. 

But then it can get him mad and make us end up arguing which wouldn't be great for us. 

But I'm really curious if she really has anything to do with him not wanting me to stay in contact with Jean. 

"Levi, if I ask a question will you get mad?" I asked him quietly. 

"If it's a dumb question I might get mad." He said sounding really tired. 

Maybe I'll ask another time then. 

"You sound really tired though. We can have this conversation another time." I said to him as I pulled away from him.

I smiled at him. 

"Just ask your question Y/N. We said we were going to talk, no arguing." He said softly looking at me. 

"Pinky promise you won't get mad at the question then." I held out my pinky to him. 

He held his out as well and interlocked our pinkies. 

"Now seal it with a kiss." I was about to push our thumbs together but Levi took that upon himself that it meant a kiss on the lips. 

My face got a little warm. 

"I meant our thumbs... that's what it means." I said looking at our hands. 

"Oh... well we still sealed it with a kiss. Ask your question now." He said rubbing his face a little. 

I chuckled a bit. 

"Feel free to not answer it, I understand it might be personal question and you might now want to answer because of how you are feeling and I get that so really if you don't want to-" 

"Out with it Y/N." He said. 

I let out a sigh. 

"Ok Ok, I wanted to know if there was someone you were attached to before and that's why you don't want Jean back in my life. Cause maybe you don't like the idea that I still have that piece of someone I wanted to be with before we got sucked into this while you had to possibly kick her to the curb completely." I said. 

I looked at Levi and he just looked at me. 

We just continued to stare at each other until I began to get really uncomfortable and broke the eye contact. 

"It's a dumb question, I shouldn't of had ask. Sorry Levi." I smiled softly at him. 

He still didn't say anything though. 

"We should be heading off to bed now. Good night Levi." I said and laid back down and turned away from him. 

He still hasn't said anything but instead of sitting up he had laid back down just like I had done so. 

He was also turned away from me. 

So should I take his silence as a yes?

Are we starting again at square 1? 

Everything that we built up to this spot, is it just gone like that? 

Maybe he didn't want me to know about her. 

I guess I can accept that. 

I just don't want us to go back to hating one another just because of that question I asked him. 

I hate myself sometimes. 

Why did I have to ask him that dumb question. 

Even though he pinky promised he wouldn't get mad, he kept the promise but he just hasn't spoken about it at all. 

I just had to ask right. 

I was getting frustrated with myself until I eventually fell asleep.