|| Beautiful ||
I know that I can lean on you
It's a beautiful life
I know that I am safe with you
Beautiful love
Every teardrop and the way we laugh
Are precious moments that
I shared with you
_______________________
♣ ♢ ♛ ♢ ♠
[ 𝗔𝘂𝘁𝗵𝗼𝗿'𝘀 𝗣𝗢𝗩 ]
It was the next morning as the calm lake water with an occasional ripple reflected the clear blue sky in Chuncheon, Gangwon-do.
Inside the cabin that floated on top of the lake are Jungkook and y/n as they both just awaken in each other's arms. Jungkook couldn't help but hover over y/n, gazing down at her with loving eyes.
"I miss waking up next to you," he said softly, staring down at her with such care and love. He badly wanted to kiss her as his hand gently held her cheek. But deep down he felt a sort of guilt, that he couldn't understand.
Y/n remained quiet but reached up to touch his face as his eyes softly looking down at her with admiration and awe. The gentleness of Jungkook's eyes made y/n nostalgic and felt heart-warming feelings. If love was a person, it would be Jungkook.
"I thought by this time around we'd be in bed and our kids running into our room annoying us," he lightly chuckled, making y/n smile.
Seeing her smile at him brought him back many memories of the girl he was madly in-love with. He brushed his thumb along the curved of her cheekbones. "I'm not really great with words but you don't understand how happy I am right now, waking up next to you," his voice was full of warmth and sincerity. "I can stay here with you for a lifetime because wherever you are is where my happiness is."
***
Jungkook was so eager to finally spend the day outside, after spending most of his time inside the other day, from y/n's strict orders. Once y/n had gone inside the house to wash up, she came back to see Jungkook outside—fishing.
She stood at a distance, watching him feeling a little annoyed that he didn't listen to her but at the same time couldn't help but smile, as he talked to the fishes like an innocent child.
"Baby come here, I'll teach you how to fish," Jungkook said, finally took notice of y/n, watching him. Y/n was hesitant at first, but she eventually complied and headed over to him.
He gave her the fishing rod and immediately place himself right behind y/n, holding onto the her hands to hold the fishing rod, making y/n tensed up with his body pinned against her.
"Okay...so now what?" y/n asked, trying calm her growing nervousness and butterflies fluttering in her stomach.
"You wait for a fish to bite onto the bait," he responded onto her ear, making her even more nervous.
Y/n didn't know what she was suppose to be doing, nor did she understood what the fun people get out of fishing. But she was persuaded from Jungkook's enthusiasm towards it.
As minutes flew by, feeling like hours to her, she was growing impatient. The way Jungkook was holding her was making it worst, making her tense. Once she felt him snuggle his head on her shoulder, she was about to push him off but she felt a strong tug on the rod.
Panic was her first reaction, not knowing what to do. But Jungkook immediately held onto her hand tight and pulled out the flapping small fish.
Y/n cheered in excitement, feeling astonished and amazed at her first time catching a fish.
"Wow, you caught a fish that quick in your first try," Jungkook applauded her, amused of her sudden cheerfulness over catching a fish after acting like she didn't care. But he soon unhooked the fish gently and quickly, before throwing it right back into the lake.
"Why did you throw it back?" Y/n asked.
"I just like to catch fishes, but I don't want to eat them." He chuckled coming right back behind her holding the rod between her hands. "Unless...you want to eat it?"
"Uh...no, I'm good," she immediately replied, feeling nervous by his closeness once again. Jungkook smirked at her reaction, knowing well he was making her nervous.
The two continued to stand at the dock, as Jungkook stood behind her holding her close to him, as they stared out towards the glimmering still-like lake, waiting for fishes to take the bait.
They became so immersed in fishing together, enjoying each other's company—laughing, smiling and talking, as hours past them by.
***
After their time fishing, the joyful two had their lunch together eating ramen outside, enjoying the light breeze and fresh nature air surrounding them.
Later on, Jungkook had remained outside, while y/n had headed inside washing the dishes when she decided to take the time to finally take a good look around the lake house.
She was looking through drawers out in the living room finding nothing that had interest her until she spotted a Fuji film camera. Y/n loved her cameras ever since Taehyung had gotten her into photography.
Before she could examine the camera, something had caught her attention that was underneath the camera. It was a pile of photographs, assuming it was taken from the Fuji-film camera. She picked them up and looked through it and saw many of Jungkook with his mother. She had seen pictures of his mother before, but she had never seen them at his house. The only time she had seen a picture was when she had visited his family home that he grew up in.
A smile appeared on y/n's face as she shuffled through the photos of the mother and son and surprised that Junsu was only in a few of them. Her heart melted seeing how cute he was with his mother and felt a sort of sadness knowing how greatly it had affected him when she had passed tragically.
"Aww, he's holding hands with his mother," y/n said in her head, glancing down at the photo on her hands. "Jungkook really was a momma's boy."
She continued to look through them until abruptly stopping at particular photos. "Woah," she gasped.
It was childhood photos of Jimin, Taehyung and Jungkook.
Y/n took notice that the last photo was a picture of them at the same lake she was in.
"Jimin and Taehyung came here too?" She said to herself. She glanced down at the three photos of them as teens. The smile on Jungkook's face looked genuine. It was the one that he rarely showed and if he does you can tell how truly happy he was.
"They all look so genuinely happy and super close friends," she thought, feeling a sudden sadness.
Y/n then flipped the photo, looking at the back and noticed a date written on it. It was about eight months prior to the death of both Jungkook and Jimin's mother.
She glanced back at the photo, feeling a sense of empathy towards all three smiling boys. One of three would soon disconnect from them, two of them will lose a mother the same year and all three would become one of the biggest mafia is South Korea. Sadly the friends became rivals, which was a huge contrast from the joyous and closeness of the three instilled in the photos.
She wished it was still like this between them. They looked so genuinely happy, care-free and full of life—even innocent looking.
She sighed looking down at the photos, then her gaze focused on the young joyful Jimin. Before her thoughts and emotions started to formulate, she immediately placed the photos back, unable to look at it any longer. She knew guilt and heartbreak would have resurface if she kept looking at those photos of Jimin.
***
Y/n finally headed outside and walked towards Jungkook standing in-front of the lake with a picnic set out for them.
"Aww, this is so cute," y/n smiled and walked towards him. "But Jungkook, look what I found." She sat beside him on the blanket, trying not to show her sadness as she handed him the fujifilm camera.
He looked down at the camera, but took notice of her sudden gloomy face. "Baby, is something wrong?"
"Huh?...uh..." she panicked not wanting him to worry about her. "No, there's nothing wrong." She tensely smiled, hoping it looks believable.
"Are you sur—"
"C'mon, let's take some pictures!" Y/n cut him off, trying to brush off the situation.
Jungkook was taken back from her sudden demeanour, knowing something must be bothering her. But he soon brushed it off and focused on the camera that she's so excited about and showed her how to use it.
"My mother actually bought this camera for Taehyung. We celebrated his fourteenth birthday here. That's when Taehyung's love for camera started." He chuckled, and felt warm nostalgic feelings of his childhood.
"But y/n, I've seen you two always together in the garden taking pictures and video recording," he suddenly became serious with a hint of despair in his voice. "I'm not gonna lie that's where my jealousy started. I hated how close you two looked."
"Jealous?" She laughed. "You admit that you were jealous." To her it was funny but she was oblivious to Jungkook's gloomy expression.
"Why wouldn't I be jealous?" He became defensive. "You're a beautiful woman. Any guy would hop to the chance to be with you. But that's too bad for them. I came first."
Then he suddenly started taking photos of her. She felt shy at first but soon gain some confidence from Jungkook's constant cheers towards her until y/n grabbed the camera back from him and, also took a photo of him.
Jungkook then grabbed the camera again, and pulled her beside him and started taking pictures together.
Y/n took the camera back and started playing around with it and went on taking photos of the scenery in-front of her, as Jungkook stood in his spot as endearment arose in him, watching her in admiration. Y/n had stop to look back at Jungkook, immediately feeling butterflies in her stomach from his attractive stare towards her, making her shyly look away.
A half smile appeared on Jungkook's face, seeing y/n get shy in-front of him. He remembered how she always made her feel like that, and how her innocent loving eyes would look at her with so much love.
Then finally she sat back down onto the picnic blanket. "C'mon Jungkook, let's sit and eat now!"
Jungkook sat beside her, as she glanced onto the lake. He watched her as if she was an artwork on display. "Y/n did I ever tell you how beautiful you truly are?"
Y/n turned to face him with her cheeks blushing. "Yes Jungkook, many times."
"But it seems like it's always hard for you to believe me." He looked deeply into her eyes wanting to let her know how he sincerely felt. "You truly are beautiful and I will keep reminding you that until you see it for yourself."
She couldn't help but smile but she kept quiet, then glanced back onto the lake trying to hide her blushing cheeks.
"Y/n..." Jungkook quietly said.
"Yes?"
"Can we start fresh?" He puts out his hand and she shook it awkwardly.
"Hey, I'm Jeon Jungkook. I'm born and raised in Seoul." He smiled. "And don't be scared but...I'm also a mafia boss."
Y/n giggled. "Hello, I'm Kim y/n. I was born in Boseong and came to Seoul just four years ago, studying at SNU but I dropped out. Now I'm the CEO of PMK Enterprise."
Both y/n and Jungkook chuckled, rejoicing together as if the dark painful past they had has finally enlightened with the start of a new beginning.
"Y/n, I have to confess a lot of things to you that you need to know if we want to start fresh," Jungkook timidly said.
"What is it Jungkook?"
"The reason I went to the club that night with all those girls on me..." he took a moment trying best to keep his voice steady, "was because I've seen you with Jimin that day. It drove me crazy and I was out of my mind. The only thing I thought of to ease my pain was to drink and...women," he paused, feeling incredible guilt creeped up on him. "I didn't sleep with them, just made out but I know it was still wrong and one of my many stupid immature disgusting mistakes."
Y/n remained quiet, taken back how matured Jungkook has become and has come a long way from his 20 year old self that she had met to the now 24 year old Jungkook.
He glanced down and took a deep sigh, before looking back at her. "Then I used Aera to show all of you that I've moved on. But in reality I never did. She was just part of my plan. But what I hate the most is that I proposed to her right in-front of you. Only now knowing she tortured you..." he said brokenly, almost in tears. "I'm sorry, y/n..."
Y/n stared at him, feeling astounded that he's owning up from his mistakes. "I'm sorry too," she finally spoke. "I could have just told you the truth. But I was hurt and I just wanted to hurt you. That was very immature of me too."
Y/n paused for a moment, trying to gather her thoughts and emotions that she been holding in. "Then I had decided to just forget about ever telling you the truth...because I didn't want you to feel guilty once you know the truth then suddenly you want to change. I wanted you to change because you yourself make the conscious decision to change for the better. You don't need the truth to change. You want to change because you don't want to hurt people around you. Which I think you did exactly that. Without even knowing the truth, you changed yourself for the better and I can see that. You truly changed Jungkook. And I'm proud of you."
A radiant smile curled onto his lips from her words. "Thanks y/n," he said with great joy, feeling a sense of accomplishment. "And that night when I brought you home drunk...we uh...we didn't actually have sex."
"What?" She stared at him with shocked eyes. Then fell silent not knowing what to say but soon felt a sudden guilt remembering she had accused him back then when she got drunk and ended up at his house and Jimin came the next day. Both Jimin and y/n had assumed, Jungkook and her had slept together since Jungkook kept making them believe it. "I'm so sorry for saying you...raped me..."
"No y/n...although it hurt me, it was initially my fault. I taken you home drunk and purposely wanted you to think we slept together so that Jimin and you break up. But yeah...nothing happened between us. You changed clothes on your own. I guess you were too drunk to remember. I didn't want to take advantage of your drunken state..."
Y/n stayed silent feeling guilty for what she had said in the past to him. But then suddenly remembered that Jungkook had also thought he raped her back in the time he locked her up and then caught Taehyung with her and went outraged.
"Jungkook," she suddenly said. "You should know too that...you didn't force yourself onto me that time you went outrage. I don't think you remember any of what had happened because you keep saying your forced yourself onto me but you didn't. I wanted it. I could have physically run off and fought and screamed for help. I didn't because I wanted...to do it."
"What?" Jungkook tensed up. He couldn't believe what he was hearing after all the guilt he had felt all these years for the thought of raping her. "But...the next morning there...was blood on the sheets."
"Yeah...uh..." she said timidly, "you were a little rough and I bled..."
He froze still unable to believe it after the incident that been eating him up all these years. "A-are...are you sure y/n?"
Y/n nodded. Jungkook took a moment to himself, feeling a tidal wave of relief. "But still...y/n...I've hurt you that day. My actions that night are still unforgivable. Then instead of staying with you that next day, I left you for days...I'm sorry y/n. If I just stayed that day...all that tortured could have been prevented and...maybe we wouldn't be..." he was unable to finish his sentence.
His eyes teared up and immediately pulled her into his arms wanted to express how sorry he was of that night and all his mistakes, but still he knew all his mistakes are unjustifiable.
"I've been wanting to ask," he suddenly said as finally let her go. "Why did you not tell me that bitch Hyori and Aera were so cruel towards you back when we were uh married? I've also been told that one incident from Taehyung. Which I scolded Taehyung for that because he could have at-least took notice something was off. If It was me who saw that, I wouldn't have believe those bitches and smack the shit out of them."
"Why did you scold Taehyung?" she frown at him. "If it weren't for him, I don't know what they would have done to me."
He chuckled. "I didn't scold him. I just wanted to see your reaction because whenever I say that I yelled at Taehyung, you get so worked up. I actually thanked him for coming that night on time. But still he should have taken notice something was off."
"Well, whenever I mention Taehyung, you get worked up also," Y/n teased him.
"Okay, let's stop talking him," he suddenly became defensive. "Answer my previous question. Why didn't you tell me about those two bitches?"
"Now that I look back. I should have told you what was happening. But I guess...I don't even know why I was like that." She sighed. "I was always taught to respect our elders. And she's your stepmother so I was raised to respect the mother of your husband. I kept letting it slide because I truly wanted to be close with her. I didn't want to be the cause of wrecking the family. So I kept it. I just had always assumed that me and her would somehow get along one day. But...that never happened."
Jungkook looked at her, loving her even more for how graceful and classy of a woman that y/n is. "Yeah I know in our Korean culture we get heavily taught to respect our elders and superiors especially our parents. But y/n, it's Seoul not Boseong. We're all westernized here."
He sighed taken notice of y/n's desolate expression. "But honestly, I've always respected and admired how you still live by our culture traditions." He suddenly gently lifts her chin up and smiled towards her. "Keep that side of you y/n, no matter how badly people think of you. Odd, weird, dumb, or whatever. At the end of the day you're better than any of those women who talks down on you. It's what makes you different. You have this sense of innocence in you and this sort of old-tradition Korean woman that I just love about you, not those stuck-up selfish ignorant ass women in Seoul."
Y/n couldn't but smile and heart filling up with warmth at Jungkook's words.
"Honestly being in Boseong with you, 2 years ago, really woke me up about our Korean culture, it really is changing now and we are all forgetting about it," he said wistfully. "In this generation especially in Seoul, no one really gives a fuck anymore. But I respect you a lot y/n, for sticking to our basic etiquettes. But Hyori is not considered my mother and never will be. You could have slapped her as much as you wanted and I wouldn't give a damn."
Y/n couldn't help but chuckled and Jungkook laughed along with her.
Once the laughter died down, y/n glanced back towards the gleaming lake but sadness surged inside Jungkook knowing reality would come seeping in, anytime soon and this moment may be his last with her—or atleast where it was just him and her.