|| When I Was Your Man ||
I'll be the first to say that I was wrong
I know I'm probably much too late
To try and apologize for my mistakes
But I just want you to know
I hope he buys you flowers
I hope he holds your hand
Do all the things I should have done
When I was your man
_______________________
♣ ♢ ♛ ♢ ♠
[ 𝗧𝗮𝗲𝗵𝘆𝘂𝗻𝗴'𝘀 𝗣𝗢𝗩 ]
"Kim y/n, will you marry me?"
Did I hear that right?
"Oh shit..." J-hope gasps beside me.
"I knew it was a bad idea to come tonight," Jin says in distress, sitting on the other side of J-hope.
"Yes, Park Jimin, I'll marry you!" She's smiling so beautifully as she says yes to her now future husband.
It's that pain in my heart again. This time it's more forceful than ever before. It feels like my heart is completely shredded into pieces.
Everyone around us are going crazy cheering for them. Meanwhile the boys and I are the only ones sitting still in our seats at the lower level.
I glance over at Jungkook who was so excited to come tonight. But his expression right now says it all—he's completely heartbroken.
He's completely still, not moving at all as if he's frozen but his eyes keeps still towards the upper deck. But I watch eyes finally shut and drops his head, feeling the essence of his misery.
"To be honest, I expected this..." I hear J-hope nervously say beside me.
I get up from my seat, feeling an overwhelming emotion I can't even explain. I just know this fucking hurts like hell.
I walk towards the server holding a tray of alcohol. He pours me alcohol into a glass but I quickly grab the whole bottle from him and gulp it down. A glass will not be enough to ease what I'm feeling right now. I need the whole bottle.
There's even fireworks and confetti to celebrate her saying yes. I glance up at the exploding fireworks trying to distract myself from looking at the upper level as I continuously take more sip of the bottle.
I thought Jungkook would go right up to the stage and try to stop y/n, but this Jungkook didn't. He's still sitting in his seat, watching everyone cheer around him.
It's been difficult to read Jungkook nowadays, but I know damn well he must feel so incredibly hurt inside.
As the crowd cheers at the engaged couple, Jungkook seems to just stay put. It seems like he's thinking hard about something. But it's a little weird to see him this calm. Usually Jungkook will impulsively do something that ends in a big commotion, especially when it comes to y/n.
I finally make my way back towards Jungkook and the boys until I see Jungkook getting up and brushes past me.
Where the fuck is he going?
J-hope and Jin takes notice of Jungkook walking away and they follow behind him and I immediately follow as well, realizing he's heading up the upper deck.
I knew it. This man is going start something. But he shouldn't do this tonight.
We make it to the upper deck as I stand beside Jungkook, paying attention to our surroundings knowing that at any moment someone might come and attack.
We spot Jimin and y/n and as we go towards them, a squad of guards comes bolting towards us. One guard steps ahead as the rest stands behind him. The one guard in-front stands face to face with Jungkook, stopping him from getting any further. The boys and I immediately reach inside our jackets where our guns are at, just to be ready.
"Sir, we gotta stop you here," the guard sternly says towards Jungkook. "You can't go near Mr. Park and Ms. Kim."
"Well, I need to speak with Ms. Kim on some important business matter,"Jungkook spat, adjusting his jacket. "And It's Jeon Jungkook you're talking to, so I suggest you let me through."
"Sir, it's Ms. Kim's birthday, and Mr. Park does not want you to ruin that for her," the guard says in a low tone, and trying to remain calm to make it look like there's nothing wrong going on. "If you try to get near them, you and I are gonna have a problem."
I don't think that guy should have said that. Jungkook hates when someone threatens him. I can see Jungkook is getting annoyed, as he clenches his fist on his sides. But to my surprise, Jungkook doesn't say anything.
"No, you and I are gonna have a problem!" J-hope snaps as he walks right to the guard's face, but Jungkook stops him.
I couldn't believe what I'm seeing. Jungkook never lets go of a threat. On top of that, he stopped J-Hope from fighting?
Jungkook turns his attention back to the guards, glaring at him with icy eyes for having the audacity to speak to him that way, already preparing myself to back Jungkook up. But my eyes grow in shock to see him turn around from the situation.
What the...is he just going to leave like that?
"Oh look Jimin's handsome younger brother is here," the drunk underboss says. "Let's hear what he gotta say."
Jungkook's face looks hesitant but he turns around to face him and his expression turns stone cold.
"Ms. Kim and Mr. Park..." he suddenly pauses, knowing well he's going start saying some shit to them.
"Congratulations," he slams his mic right to the drunk guy. My mouth slightly gapes from his calmness of the situation. I watch Jungkook staring at y/n, knowing well he wants to go up to her and take her away from Jimin but he instead turns himself around and leaves.
The boys and I look at one another in astonishment. So we're just gonna leave? Just like that?
Y/n's eyes finally meets mine but I quickly look away unable to have her see the sadness in my eyes. I turn around to leave but Yoongi quickly stops me.
"Kim Taehyung, Vice President of Jeon Enterprise! How about you? What do you gotta say?"
I glance at my enemy, a little hesitant to speak. "Congrats Jimin. You got a great woman. And y/n..." Our eyes meet and the pain in my heart quickly strikes again. "I hope he makes you happy."
***
I finally pull up in the drive way of the house right next to Jungkook's all black Lamborghini.
I guess he's already home.
Seconds later J-hope and Jin pulls up in their car right next my car. When we had left the yacht, we had to hop onto a speed boat that we had nearby to return back to shore. The only reason we were able to get into the party was that we had two guards of Jimin's working for us. Jimin should really be more diligent in choosing who works for him.
I come out of my car and the boys do the same. "You think Jungkook is alright?" Jin leans back on his car.
"I don't know man..." J-hope responds, as he lights up a cigarette. "He must be hurt that Jimin and y/n are now engaged."
They both look at me to see if I was going to say anything but I keep quiet. I myself is still having a hard time accepting what had occurred, I can imagine Jungkook right now. I just wanted to get inside and talk to Jungkook.
"Knowing Jungkook, he's in the office drowning himself with alcohol and smoking weed," J-hope blows smoke into the air. "He always has the hardest time when it comes to y/n. But now that she's engaged...I don't know what that man is going to do."
"I'm a little worried though," Jin sighs. "He seems to truly have changed for the better but now that this shit happened, you think we getting the old Jungkook again?"
No one answers him and it becomes silent between us three. But my mind is somewhere else.
"I hope not though," Jin breaks the silence. "I kind of like this Jungkook. He's calmer in situations but when it's time to be Don, he becomes vicious."
"Yes, you're right," J-hope agrees, as he throws his cigarette on the floor and steps on it. "This Jungkook is better. But he should have punch that guard, he was annoying as hell."
"Taehyung," Jin calls out to me. "Why are you so quiet?"
"Aww Taehyung, are you also sad you can never have a chance with the girl of your dreams, now that she's getting married to our very own enemy and your old buddy Park Jimin?" J-hope says in a mocking tone. I hear Jin chuckling but I glare at him and he becomes silent.
"In all seriousness Taehyung, you never admit it but we all can see it," Jin says.
"The only one that doesn't see it is y/n," J-hope adds. "To be honest Taehyung, out of all three of you boys falling for her. I feel bad for you the most. You never even had a chance to show her." Then suddenly he bursts into a laugh. "Now you never will!"
"Boys," I finally speak, having enough of their shit. "Shut the fuck up and let's go check up on Jungkook."
***
We all went to the office right away knowing damn well he would be there. But to my surprise—he wasn't. We went to his room, and he wasn't there either.
"Where could he be?" J-Hope asks as we three boys meet up in the living room after not finding Jungkook in the office as we expected.
Then suddenly I remember y/n ways talking about the balcony. I quickly walk towards y/n's old room and the boys follow right behind me. I open the door and I already see a figure at the balcony.
I walk closer and there he is, sitting on one of the chairs as he smokes, looking up at the night sky.
Even though we are literally standing at the side watching him, he remains focus on the night sky. I stare up at his direction trying to understand what's so fascinating about it because he's been doing this a lot wherever we go.
"I thought you quit smoking?" I finally ask him walking closer to him.
"I did. This is a vape pen so it doesn't count," his says weakly. "And what can I do when my life is nothing but endless stress and pain." He sighs, as he continues vaping. "And I'm honestly so tired of everything."
"Bro, why didn't you beat the shit out of that guard?" J-Hope cuts in, and sits across him. "That fucking guard was pissing me off, like who does he think he is talking to us like that?"
Jungkook doesn't answer, looking like he could care less until he finally says, "It's whatever bro."
Whatever? That's usually not how he response to situation like this.
"It's whatever?" J-hope scoffs, frowning. "Bro, what happened to—"
"No for real, why didn't you punch him or say anything?" Jin cuts him off.
Jungkook looks down, taking a deep breath. "I was thinking about y/n. It is her birthday afterall. And...I didn't want to ruin that for her," he says with sadness in his voice. "I just wanted her to be happy and enjoy her birthday."
"But...aren't you hurt that she's engaged to Jimin now?" Jin asks.
He takes a while to answer as if he's forcing himself to talk and finally looks up with eyes dull with sadness. "Of course you all know how much I love her."
"Then why didn't you stop her from saying yes?" J-Hope asks.
"Because I love her," he answers with his voice sounding weak and broken. "That's the thing bro...I love her too much."
Jin and J-hope looks towards me but I turn my attention back at Jungkook who continues to speak.
"I don't want to hurt her anymore. As much as it hurts me to see her with another man, I have to let her go..." his voice is heavy with emotion. "I never really deserved her anyways."
"I told myself that I'll fight for her to win her heart back but she made that choice tonight and made me realize maybe there really isn't no love left in her for me..." he expresses, sounding so despondent. "So why should I fight, when it's just useless at this point. Did you see how happy she was tonight? I haven't seen that in a long time. And I don't want to ruin that for her."
He glances down and takes a deep breath before looking back up at the night sky. "...I guess it's time to really let her go now."
There's a moment of silence between all of us. The boys and I didn't really know how to react to what he had said. They keep looking towards me as if I would know the right thing to say to him when I myself is still trying to act like I'm not affected by this.
"But I'll still continue to make up my wrongs for her to show her just how sorry I am for my past actions," he speaks again with his voice still low and sad. "And hopefully in the end, I get a forgiveness."
"That's good," I finally speak. "But how are you going to do that now?"
"I...I really don't know, she won't even speak to me," he answers with his voice low. "But you know what hurt me more than y/n saying yes to Jimin...It's the fact that she doesn't think I would ever come to her rescue. Today she told me that it was Jimin who saved her that night with that bastard. When it was me. Jimin didn't fucking tell her. But she truly believed I didn't even come that night."
"I was gonna let her know, but it seems she preferred Jimin instead of me," he says with a sudden frustration and hurt in his voice. "But that shit hurt when she told me I wouldn't even come and that I was happy. When all along I came that night. I was willing to die for her that night and I even risked my own mob for her."
He suddenly becomes quiet as he looks to be thinking to himself. "I must have hurt her that badly for her to say that and think of me that way."
All three boys become speechless, knowing there was nothing we could say that will ease the pain that he's going through.
"Anyways, it's her and Jimin now," he speaks again with his voice breaking. "I can't force her to love me. She's happy and that's all that matters to me."
I can see that his eyes seem like he wanted to cry but I think he was holding it in.
But I think I'm starting to understand Jungkook now. He was changing himself for her. Even if it hurts him deeply inside. But it's too late now...y/n seemed to have truly moved on.