📍 𝙰𝚑𝚢𝚎𝚘𝚗-𝚍𝚘𝚗𝚐 (dong = neighborhood)
𝙼𝚊𝚙𝚘 𝙳𝚒𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚒𝚌𝚝, 𝚂𝚎𝚘𝚞𝚕,
𝚂𝚘𝚞𝚝𝚑 𝙺𝚘𝚛𝚎𝚊.
[𝗞𝗶𝗺 𝗬/𝗡'𝘀 𝗣𝗢𝗩]
It was the night where my life completely changed.
It was back in Seoul, where it all happened. Now I'm in Japan, living with a friend of mine—Yoona.
As I look back at that night, and how everything completely changed right after that...I just wish I had known better. If I could go back to that night I would have changed my decisions and maybe the outcome of my life would have been far so different as it is right now.
I might have been better off, and save myself from all the pain that had unfolded. My life would have still been normal.
I was at my school library, completely exhausted from all the studying. My eyes were so strained and I feel like my brain was going to explode from all information I had cramped into my brain.
It was time for me to head home. I didn't realize how late it was. I decided to pack my stuff up and took the bus home.
If I had only knew what would have happened next, I would have stayed longer, and perhaps may have avoided upcoming events that had led to where I am now.
I was 19 years old, second-year nursing student at Seoul National University. I needed another 2 years to get my degree and finally be doing something with my life and make my mother proud.
My mother was back home in Boseong. It's a small town in South Jeolla Province but tourists had often come there wanting to see and taste the famous green teas it was known for.
I had missed waking up every morning to the sounds of birds chirping, the roosters and even my mother waking me up to go feed the animals in the backyard.
I missed walking out the door and seeing terrace farmlands, often occupied with local women handpicking the tea leaves. My house in Boseong was surrounded by a spectacular mountainous landscape with cedar trees, and farmlands, which I rather see everyday than seeing tall buildings and packed traffic streets polluting the air even more than it already is.
So you can imagine what my experience of living in Seoul had been. But I've brought along my pink bunny plushie that has a bold right eyebrow to Seoul with me. It was given to me by my mother and it was the only thing that felt like home to me.
I had lived in Seoul for two years during my university years, and remembered how I couldn't fully adjust to their lifestyle. I went from a slow-paced simple lifestyle into a fast-paced environment. Seoul is an insanely energetic city. Girls my age seem to be all about the nightlife, but it never really interest me. I was merely focus in my school, reading my books and watching anime.
My social skills had diminished and barely have any forms of social interactions. I couldn't connect with anyone, not even my two roommates. I was practically living in my own world.
I had realized how quite different everyone was. Everyone had seem to always be in a hurry and don't even have time stop to smile at one another. Back home, everyone knew each other and always happily greeting one another other, since it was a small community. Everyone was just so kind and trusting. We were all like a family.
In Seoul and even here in Tokyo, people seem to have no care about anyone but themselves. The girls always seem to be in competition too, which I don't know why. They're all so pretty and of course they're all so rich too. So what more can they want? Shouldn't they be happy? Some of them don't even have to go to school, while I was stuck in a program that I wasn't too sure of and had been working a minimum wage job trying to pay for my rent and school expenses.
I had gotten accepted to the top school in nursing—Seoul National University. When I found out, I remembered having a difficult time leaving my mother behind and the town I grown to love, but I just couldn't pass out on the opportunity.
I ended up living in a small house with two roommates. That night, they weren't home. They were out clubbing on a Friday night, while I was in the library studying. I always forget that people my age are like that in the city, whereas, in Boseong, we just spend our nights with friends and family or go to the plaza of the town and celebrate with the local community. And people are usually married at my age. In Seoul, it's different. Everyone seemed to all focus on their education and careers. It was understandable. It was expensive to live in Seoul.
My mother actually wanted me to marry off one of my long time friend. His name is Jackson Wang. He's 4 years older than me. He was my best friend growing up, but I didn't love him like that. Although, he did confessed his feelings for me. I just couldn't return it. I mean he had everything I wanted in a guy—Kind, caring, smart and funny. There was a time I tried my hardest to return those feelings, but I just wasn't feeling any spark between us that I had always wished to have with someone one day.
But I think I just watched too much K-dramas and animes because I definitely know now that romance isn't always rainbows and butterflies. It could be dark and painful.
At that time, I wanted to do something with my life, I always dreamt of doing something big. Something to do with art. I loved art. Anything to do with art is my passion. I had wished then that I'd maybe start my own business, but I thought it was just unattainable for a girl like me.
It was hard to get into business or do anything in art and make good money. Especially in a city like Seoul. The Korean business market is heavily competitive and they're also fixated on looks, which I think they should really abolish. But that's just how it always has been. The better looking you are or money you have, the more advantage you have to getting hire—or more privileges.
But the only thing I could think of doing at that time was to become a nurse. I had always took care of the elders in my neighbourhood. I had grew fond of them and they had had convinced me to become a nurse, which I ended doing. But I had many moments constantly questioning my program. Was it really what I wanted to do?
It was about 12 am when I was finally nearing home. The creaking sounds and foul smells of garbage assaulted my senses as I walked in the dark alley way of my quiet neighbourhood. At night, it can get pretty scary, so I always tried to avoid coming home late. The alley barely had lights, only one bulb illuminated the garbage cans.
But I made a sudden stop to glanced up and admire the distant view of Namsan Tower that illuminated a green glow. I've seen that tower everyday, but never had a chance to get up there or even come near it.
It truly was a beautiful view. Although the living area of my neighbourhood wasn't the greatest, I swear it had the best view of the Seoul skyline.
My eyes soon shifted up towards the night view filled with stars when suddenly I get startled from a loud screeching sound. My eyes widen to see an eerie shadow rose from the ground getting bigger and bigger, only to see an innocent looking black cat with green glowing eyes, peering up at me.
I gasped trying to catch my breath, feeling relief that it was just a cute little cat. The cat soon walked away and disappeared into the darkness, leaving me alone in this eerie alleyway.
Although my house was nearing, I placed my earphones in my ears and listened to IU's beautiful soft voice to calm my sudden nerves, as I get deeper into the dark alley way. It was always so nerve-racking whenever I walked home alone at night. But a sense of relief washed over me once my one floor concrete house, situated on top of long stairs, had finally come to a view.
I was about to walk up the crooked concrete stairs that led towards my house, when I get startled to see a man leaning against the cement wall. He was panting heavily trying to catch his breath, as I stood still like a statue staring at this young man in all black.
════════════════════════
♣ ♢ ♛ ♢ ♠
Author's Note:
The start of this chapter in italics is the present y/n in Japan. It's her speaking and recounting how she got to where she is now (only from chapters 1-4). The story of the past gradually unfolds from there on, towards the present her.
For those re-reading, PLEASE DO NOT COMMENT ANY SPOILERS❗️