S: Mon, im sorry
Please dont leave me!!!
(Sam said with a pained voice
I could hear the slight cracking of her voice and the hoarseness with every word she said
She hugged me tighter and refused to let go
Sometimes, i really want to open up Sam's brain to see how it works
After everything that we have been through, does she really think i could ever leave her?)
M: I couldn't afford to leave u even if I wanted to Sam
I thought u already knew that by now
(She let go and turned my body toward her. She then held my face and asked with tears in her eyes)
S: Promise me you won't leave me Mon!
U won't leave me, right?!
I was wrong! I was wrong Mon!
I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
Please dont leave me!
(Sigh! Seeing Sam like this is really painful
When the doctors told us that she was mentally unstable, we didn't predict that it would be this bad!
Just me leaving her for a couple of hours is enough for her to almost have a mental breakdown!!!
How am I even able to get mad at her in the future then?!
Should I live on the fact that I could never win against her?!
I want a normal relationship!
I deserve to be allowed to be upset and tired!
I deserve to be moody and unreasonable sometimes!
I want to be doted and pampered too!
No! Never! I will never allow our relationship to stay like this!
We won't last like this!
By hook or by crook Sam, i will make sure i get my Sam back!
I need to schedule our sessions ASAP!)
M: Sam, I won't leave u!
I love u Sam!
I would never leave u!
Don't worry.
Even when the rest of the world turns their back on you, trust that I never will!
U are stuck with me for the rest of your life! Do u hear me, Sam?
S: Can u promise me Mon?
Promise me that no matter what, u will never give up on me?
M: Sam, u really are underestimating my love for you
Can't u see that you are my world and my everything?
Leaving u would kill me too Sam
I am not that stupid!
S: But... but u were leaving Mon
M: What do u mean I was leaving?
S: I would always know when u are nearby Mon, coz only then would my heart be at ease
I was waiting for u to come in
but u never did
I was begging u to come in
Didn't u feel it, Mon?
How desperate I was to be with u
(I was caught off guard.
Apparently, I would never qualify as a spy in my life
I never thought Sam could see through me so easily
If it were any other person, I would have been terrified right now
Having someone know u to this extent was scary
But with Sam, it just felt comforting
Knowing that I have someone who was willing to get to know me this deeply and for her to have succeeded to know me better than I know myself is endearing.
U were right Sam, for a moment , I really hesitated, but I will never admit it
I am sorry Sam!
I was weak
but I promise, I wouldn't have left for good!
I just wanted to breathe a little!
I wasn't at fault, right?
I just wanted to throw a little tantrum!)
S: U were planning to leave just now, right?
U contemplating on leaving me, right?
U have grown tired of me right, Mon?
M: Sam, that's stupid!
Why won't u believe me when I say that I love u Sam?
S: I do, Mon. I do believe you
But we are not talking about love Mon
U could love me and still choose to leave me
M: You are thinking too much, Sam
I just needed time
I was just a little frustrated and needed to vent. That's all
That doesn't mean I wouldn't come back
I will always come back to u, Sam
U should know that by now
S: But what if one day, u won't come back, Mon?
M: I need u to have faith in me, Sam
I, Mon, am not a magnanimous person
I could not afford to give my heart out to just anybody
Once I had decided to give it away, I could no longer take it back
So, Sam, ever since the day you took my heart,
We are forever bound whether you like it or not
S: Can u promise me that u will never give up on me, Mon?
M: Sam, I promise!
Don't give up on me either, ok?
S: hmmm... I will never give up on you Mon!
M: That's good
Now be good
Eat and sleep early, ok?
S: No! You can't leave!
Stay with me, Mon, please!
M: Didn't I just say that I wouldn't leave Sam?
Why are we back to square one?
S: But u were saying goodbye just now!
M: Why do I feel like I am coxing a child?
S: Aren't I your baby?
M: Sigh! Fine fine!
You and your glib tongue!
S: Don't u love my tongue, though, Mon?
M: So you're teasing me now, huh?
U really think I have much restraint, Sam?
(She swallowed hard and obediently stopped teasing me when she knew she went too far)
M: Come on, stop staying outside
People are staring
Let's go in
I brought u dinner, so go on and eat
(I then showed her the bag of food that I brought her and that instantly made her smile widely.
Her pearly whites highlighting her red kissable lips!
While I was stuck in a lucid dream, She took my hand and led me to her room)
S: hmmm...I haven't eaten yet
I was waiting for you
Thank u for coming back for me, Mon
M: hmmm... always Sam
I already told u,
U couldn't get rid of me even if u wanted to
S: That would never happen!
There would never be a day that I wouldn't want u, Mon
M: Great to hear then!
Now, be a good girl and eat, ok?
I bought a pricey steak for u today
Hope u like it!
S: hmmm... I will always like whatever u bring me, Mon
I would like it better if u cooked for me, but that could wait when we're married hihi
(She just casually dropped a bomb on me and focus on food?
Wow! She was now busying herself with taking out the bag of food when she noticed that there was only one package)
S: Mon, where's your dinner?
M: I already ate (I lied)
S: u ate without me? (Sam said sulking)
M: i'm sorry, baby. I was hungry and couldn't wait any longer, plus I was in a bad mood and was determined to ignore you today
I promise to always eat with u in the future, ok?
S: hmmm (still sulking)
(Sam took small and careful bites
I really hated when Sam eats like this
She looks so restrained, so conscious of her every move
When Sam eats, you can immediately tell that she wasn't ordinary
She couldn't hide in her bones her etiquette and her upbringing
I found it sad that she can't even fully let go of her control even when she is eating
But hey, it is a little bit cute too
Fuzzy... haha I remember the gang calling her Fuzzy
Looking at her now, it really does sound fitting)
S: Are u really just going to sit there and watch me eat, Mon?
M: hmmm... want me to leave?
S: No! no! I just, hmmm it's awkward
can u eat with me, Mon?
M: I already ate Sam
Besides, I bought that for u
You lost too much weight recently, I need to fatten u up
S: I am not a cattle!
M: hahaha who said?
You are my sheep, Sam, can't u tell?
(I could see her eyes darkening!
So I just showed her my tongue in a playful manner)
S: im sorry, Mon
M: hmmm... sorry for?
S: for stopping
M: hmmm... it's ok
I understand
S: I upset u, right?
U left because u were angry at me?
M: I was at first, but when I cooled down a bit, I realized that I was angry at myself more
I should've known better
I was too impulsive!
I wasn't thinking!
I didn't leave u because I was angry at u Sam, I simply wanted to punish myself
S: ur punishment is cruel Mon
If u really wanted to atone, let me finish what I started, ok?
M: What?! What do u mean?
SAM! don't make this hard for me!
This isn't the right place to do it!
S: hahaha I never said I would do it now Mon
I meant when we get home
I simply wanted u to know that u owe me and that I wouldn't take no for an answer again
(My cheeks were quickly reddening
I was so embarrassed
She was still teasing me!!!)
M: Are u having fun teasing me, Sam?
(Noticing my mood wasn't right, she quickly shook her head no and dropped her smirk)
**************************************
Hi loves,
How's everybody?
The news had been devastating lately and to be honest, it was super hard for me to find the will to write hahaha
If there is one thing I could request from u guys, I hope that everybody could think Rationally and act humanely
Show business has never been kind
When one is under a contract, u are bound to be it's slave
U lose your freedom to express yourself and your desires
Up until now, I stand firm with actions speak louder than words
If freen is really happy with seng then I am also happy for her
She deserves all the happiness in the world
In my book, she never lied
She and Becky always said they were just PhiNong, it was us who assumed it to be more
Yes, it was driven by the constant shipping of their friends and their company but was that their fault?
Could they have said no?
We don't know what happens on the back end.
Show business is never a place full of sunshine and rainbows
It is messy and dark, yet many people stay in it because acting is what they live for
All I ask of u, is to not give up on them
Even if freen and Becky does not end up together in real life, that doesn't mean that whatever they have represented is lost
Sam and Mon will forever be in my heart
The happiness that GAP and SamMon had given me will never be taken away
The lives that have been changed because of them and the story that they shared will never be turned back
Let us not give up on them
Let us continue loving them
Let us continue to support them
If that is too hard, then just continue to respect them.
They do not deserve the hate
No one does
I have said my piece
Please dont hate me too
Thank u for all your reads, comments, votes and shares!
It means a lot!
Please support me and this story until the end!
Share ur thoughts down the comments please! Love hearing from u guys! It seriously makes my day :)
Like,comment,share and vote please!
Please support the author by sharing this story anywhere u can!
If u want to see my vids on the fanboom or what to hear me sing hahah ( who would ever want that lol ) you can visit my tiktok page @chachong7 and yes it is shameless plugging lol
You can also find me in twitter and instagram via Goldendarkness101/ SimpLyChA12 :)
Love,
Your melancholic author
Cha 😘