Shock And Awe

The Sketch

A/N: Please note that other triggering content (self-harm and suicide will be discussed) throughout the story. Please be forewarned and take precautions if these are troubling for you.

A/N: Violence towards a primary character is mentioned/discussed in this chapter. Please be forewarned if that is troubling for you.

A/N: Sorry for the continued delays in posting...my muse apparently has narcolepsy. I think they are at least partially awake again...hopefully. And as of now, I'm still planning on making this a fairly long, multi-part story, but if y'all aren't into it...I'll wrap it up soon.

Thank you to everyone that is still reading and commenting on this story...The positive reviews  and votes definitely help keep me and my stubborn muse motivated...so keep them coming!

And remember...reviews and votes keep me and my muse motivated...especially if they're positive!!!

***More drama and more secrets revealed***

I hope you enjoy this latest chapter...Now on with the show!!!

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"It is the false shame of fools to try to conceal wounds that have not healed." ~ Horace

"Don't let your wounds make you become someone you're not." ~  Demi Moore

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Chapter 65

My thoughts have been racing at a pace that surely would win any land speed record ever since I walked out of Emily's room earlier. In an effort to try and quell the nervous tension, I tried to just sit down in one of the uncomfortable chairs in the hall. That, in the end, proved to be completely pointless and impractical.

I had hoped that by not pacing, not showing the nervousness that had been building since I noticed the fear in Emily's eyes earlier, I would be able to keep her kids from becoming as panicked as I was starting to become.

In addition, I had hoped by just sitting, I would be able to stop the racing thoughts in my own mind and just focus on one or two things instead of the hundreds that seemed to be bombarding me all at once.

All of the moments that Emily and I had spent together over the years...the one and only night we spent together that went so horribly wrong the next morning...all of the secrets I had learned over the past few days...this horrible sequence of events that led me to where I am now...where Emily is now...all of her wounds that I saw on that horrible sketch...how traumatized Emily must be feeling now...how ashamed even though she has no reason at all to feel that way...all of the secrets I am still keeping from Emily and everyone else...how much I wish I could see my son...what I could do to fix everything.

"Why can't things just be simple for once?" I quietly muttered to myself.

Then...as if by some weird stroke of luck...intuition...or a common bond with her mother...Summer mirrored almost exactly the actions and motions that Emily had taken the evening that Garcia had been shot and I was internally panicking waiting in that horrible hospital waiting room for word on her condition.

Summer slowly walked over to my side...taking a seat next to me and gently, quietly, reached over and took my hand. She never said a word...but instead offered a comforting squeeze of my hand and it had nearly the same effect Emily's actions had that night years earlier. It grounded me.