Shock And Awe

Something Feels Off

A/N: Please note that other triggering content (self-harm and suicide will be discussed) throughout the story. Please be forewarned and take precautions if these are troubling for you.

A/N: Violence towards a primary character is mentioned/discussed in this chapter. Please be forewarned if that is troubling for you.

A/N: Thank you to everyone who has continued to read, post comments, and offer feedback on this story, as well as put up with the very long delay in getting this latest chapter up. The next couple of chapters may take a little bit of time as I am still trying to recover from COVID, and that is taking a little longer than I would prefer. That being said, as long as everyone is still interested in the story, I will continue to update as frequently as possible.

Thank you again for everyone who continues to comment on this story...The positive reviews definitely help keep me and my stubborn muse motivated...so keep them coming!

***More drama and more secrets revealed***

I hope you enjoy this latest chapter...Now on with the show!!!

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"It is the false shame of fools to try to conceal wounds that have not healed." ~ Horace

"Don't let your wounds make you become someone you're not." ~ Demi Moore

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Something Feels Off

I hear a soft knock on the door again, and see Dr. Hayes walk back through the door. "Are you ready to go now Emily?"

Let's just hope this surgery works. I know JJ is going to be super pissed if, or more likely when, she finds out I had surgery instead of some standard tests while she was gone. Not that she could have done anything but wait and pace around the hospital during a surgery either. I just know she misses Henry and if she waited around here, she would've missed an opportunity to spend time with him. Who knows how long I'll be stuck here, if the surgery will actually work or not, and if I can find any opportunity to get her to leave again to see him. This way, regardless of what happens during the surgery, I'll know at least she got to see him for a little while. I'll just deal with whatever happens after the surgery whenever I wake up.

"Yeah...I'm ready. Let's get this over with."

"Did you finally tell JJ you were having surgery?" Dr. Hayes inquires.

"No...I told her that you were taking me for some standard tests so you could determine how much longer I needed to stay in the hospital. If the surgery goes well, hopefully she won't ever need to know I had it. If she finds out about it, I'll deal with that then. If the surgery doesn't fix everything, I'll just have to deal with that later too. That's if she doesn't run away from me when she realizes what a complete mess I am."

"You really think that after all of this time, and after everything that JJ has done to try and help you, that she would run away from you now?" Dr. Hayes asks, quirking her eyebrows upward.

"She has run away from me before...for far less than what I am going through right now." I softly reply.

"I usually don't interfere or say anything about my patient's personal lives, but I am going to make an exception in this case. I don't think you are giving her enough credit. I can see how much she loves you. Everyone on the staff can. Hopefully you will be able to as well." Dr. Hayes softly replies before continuing. "As for the surgery, if something goes wrong, am I allowed to inform your kids or JJ that you were having surgery today, or did you want me to continue to evade the questions they have for me?" Dr. Hayes questions, a little irritation beginning to form in her voice.