Loving a Believer

Chapter 9 - For the First Time

Here I was, lying on the couch at Storm's office. Sumama ako sa kanya rito dahil wala naman kaming pasok at nakakainip din sa bahay. I was just scrolling through social media, watching entertaining videos and seeing random pictures on Instagram. I stopped, when I received a message. I clicked it. 

Sam Walker: Hi

I was surprised when I saw who it was. It was Sam, my ex-boyfriend. I glanced at Storm who was busy signing papers on his table before I typed my reply:

Me: Hello

In just three seconds he replied.

Sam Walker: How are u?

Me: I'm good. How about u?

"I thought he's mad at me?" I mumbled.

Sam Walker: I don't know if i'm okay.

Me: Why?

Sam Walker: That's why i wanna talk to u. I know it's been years, but the pain is still here.

Naramdaman ko ang biglang pagbigat ng dibdib ko. I felt guilt. I realized, I needed to apologize.

Me: I'm so sorry.

I swallowed as I replied. I felt a lump in my throat. I knew how cruel I was to him when I broke up with him.

Sam Walker: I just don't really understand why u broke up with me. We were okay.

I heaved a sigh. It was the perfect time to tell him the truth.

Me: Dad arranged me to someone. He said he would kill u if i didn't stay away from u. Sorry if i didn't tell u. I just wanted you to be safe.

It took a few seconds before he replied:

Sam Walker: I love u Fara

My lips parted in surprised. Hindi ko alam kung gaano ako katagal tumitig sa screen ng cellphone ko. Halo-halong emosyon ang nararamdaman ko, ngunit kalungkutan ang mas nangibabaw sa lahat.

Sam Walker: I'm sorry i can't get over u. I tried to be in a relationship w/ someone else but i'm still into u. U know how much i love u, cos u are my first love.

Me: But i'm already married. I'm happily married to my husband and we already have 1 son.

I felt so sorry for him, the reason why I bursted into tears. I didn't want the feeling of hurting someone's feelings. I'd been there. When Storm didn't love me back, it hurt me so bad. And Sam didn't deserve to feel that, too. He was a loving boyfriend.

Sam Walker: I'm sorry

With full of tears in my eyes, I replied:

Me: I hope u'll forgive me. I didn't mean to hurt u

Sam Walker: I forgive u. I understand. I'm just hurting n missing u so bad. I was hesitating to talk to u cos i know u don't want me anymore. I just take courage rn.

Me: I'm sure God has reserved someone for u. U'll meet her in the right time.

Sam Walker: I don't wanna think about that rn.

Hindi ako nakareply kaagad. Hindi matigil ang luha ko sa pagtulo.

Sam Walker: sorry for bothering u. Thanks for ur response. Take care always.