Loving a Believer

Chapter 14: Know Him Deeper

Storm and I were now going somewhere. He gave me a chance to go to the place where he had been going since he was young. I heard the sound of neighing of the horse. My eyes widened when I saw a white horse behind the tree. This was my first time to see a horse face to face.

Storm walked towards the horse and touched it on the head. "He is Whitey. Whitey was supposed to be a name for dogs but I always thought that horses and dogs are just the same when I was a kid," he said.

I laughed. "That's funny. But he's beautiful," I complimented.

"Do you want to ride on him?" he asked.

I gasped in surprise. "Can I?"

He nodded.

"But I don't know how to―"

"I'll be with you." He assured me.

He kept what he said. He guided me to ride the horse and then he rode next - he was behind me. Our destination seemed to go uphill because the location of Hacienda Ramirez had hills around.

"Ano'ng oras na?" I asked. Hindi ko kasi dala ang cell phone ko at wala rin akong suot na relo.

He looked at his wrist watch. "Almost five."

We crossed the stream that had a very clean water, until we reached the very end of the area. I was rendered speechless as I watched the foggy sky and the beautiful view of the place with admiration.

"Wow!" I exclaimed in wonder. Storm helped me to get off the horse. "Is this real?" I asked when I peered down. Good thing, there were steel railings surrounding the cliff. Tila pinagawa talaga ito para hindi ka mangangamba na sumilip sa ibaba dahil nakalulula ito sa sobrang taas. Kitang-kita ko mula rito ang mga bahay sa ilalim at mga puno. "'Yan pa rin ba ang hacienda?" I asked.

"Yeah. Mas maganda rito kapag gabi," aniya at sumilip din sa ibaba. I got worried when he sat on the railing facing the cliff.

"A-are you not scared? You might fall," I said.

"Don't worry. I'm used to it," he said, watching the bottom of the cliff. Medyo nakahinga ako nang maluwag. "Wanna try?" he asked me. I quickly shook my head.

"P'wede ba tayong mag-stay dito hanggang gabi?" I asked.

"No, wala tayong ilaw. Madilim na ang daan kapag gabi," he replied.

"Okay." Binalik ko ang tingin ko sa ibaba.

"Can you see that big roof?" He pointed a finger at the big roof below. I nodded my head. "That's Lolo's haunted house," he said and let out a chuckle.

"Binabawal mo ako kanina, tapos ikaw naman ngayon." I rolled my eyes at him but there was a slight smile on my lips.

"Ngayon ko lang na-realize na nakakatakot pala talaga ang mansion ni Lolo. Nasanay na kasi ako dahil palagi ako rito noong bata pa ako," he shared.

"I see," I said.

Ilang saglit na namayani ang katahimikan sa amin. Pinagmamasdan lang namin ang paligid.

"Noong bata ako, dito ako pumupunta kapag bad trip ako." He broke the silence.

Napaangat ako ng tingin sa kanya. "Why here?"

"Because I can shout here like 'ANG PANGET MO KIRBY!'" He shouted the last words, and it echoed.

I burst into laughter. "Seriously? Nag-aaway kayo ni Kirby?" hindi makapaniwalang tanong ko.

"Yeah, especially when I lost to him during our games. He was cheating sometimes. That caused us some misunderstanding."

"I agree with you," I said, controlling my laugh. "Kirby is a cheater in any type of games but he's still a loser."

"Don't tell me, he's cheating on you in games, too?" he told me while smirking.

I nodded and said, "Always."

He just let out a chuckle. "Come on, try to sit here," aya niya sa akin.

Nag-aalinlangan man ako, napatango na rin ako. Inalalayan niya ako na sumampa sa railings, hanggang sa makaupo ako sa tabi niya. Labis ang kaba ko dahil nakalulula talaga kapag tumitingin ako sa ilalim.

"How's the view now?"

"I-it f-feels like I am flying," I said nervously. I heard him chuckle. Nakakapit nang mahigpit ang isa kong kamay sa railings habang nakahawak pa rin nang mahigpit ang isa pang kamay ko sa kamay niya. "Your hand is cold. Are you afraid of heights?"

I shook my head. "I'm afraid to f-fall."

"Masasanay ka rin," aniya.

I looked at him. He was just staring at the birds flying above the sky. I watched the movement of his hair caused by the strong wind. I couldn't take my eyes off him because I was mesmerized. D*mn, he was a very handsome man. I wanted to know this man even more. He was pure and kind. I'd never met a guy like this before.

Storm was different. There was something about him that I wanted to know. Well, I still have a lot of years to know that.

We shouldn't be like this. We shouldn't be as close as this like the other arranged married couples because we both didn't like this...

"You know, Fara..." he spoke while his eyes were on the sky. "This view shows the glory of God. This earth is filled with His glory. How I admire His awesome power." There was a charming smile on his lips.

I did not respond. I didn't want to start our conversation with his God. I already accepted the fact that he has God and I have no God.

"I don't want to force you to believe in the existence of God, but I want to tell you that..." His gaze met mine. "His love is the most beautiful thing that I know," he sincerely said. "Think about it... I am wretched, I am nothing, I am unworthy... yet He loves me." I could see emotions in his eyes like he meant every word he said.

I did not respond immediately because I needed time to process what he had said.

"How can you say that?" I asked in confusion.

"Who do you think I am?" he asked.

"I don't think you are what you have said. You are so different. You are an amazing person--"

"No, I am not," he cut me off. I fell silent. "Nothing is good in me. Nothing..."

"But you are good," I said, still confused. How could he say those things? It wasn't what I saw in him.

"That's because of Christ who lives in me," he said.

My mouth shut and I kept staring at him. I couldn't believe that that was what he believed. He was really one of a kind.

After a moment, I looked away and said, "If He's real, my life shouldn't be like this." I'd already said this phrase to him before, but here I was... opening it up to him again.

I heard him sigh. "Ano ba ang buhay mo?"

"My life is hopeless," I whispered.

"God says, 'Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light'," he softly said. "Fara, your life is hopeless because you don't let Hope enter into your life."

I was stabbed by what he said. It ran down to my soul like I wanted to believe now everything he said.

"Come to Jesus and you'll find hope and rest," he added. "But believe in Him first..."

I felt his hold on my hand tighten. I turned my gaze back at him, so our eyes met again.

"I don't know what to believe. Yes, I know Jesus Christ, but my knowledge about him is not enough. I don't know enough to believe him."

"I'll make you know Him..." He smiled at me. "Deeper."

I stared at him and saw the sincerity on his face. The genuine smile that he was giving me was the reason why I smiled back at him and nodded.