13th Doctor x reader

Distant

You stepped into the TARDIS after the others. You felt their gaze upon you the whole way back but you didn't make eye contact. You were heartbroken that they all believed you did it. You kept your gaze on your shoes, holding the TARDIS tightly and standing a few steps further from the others than usual.

"(Y/n)..." the doctor started, staring at you.

"I want to go home" you whispered suddenly, loud enough for them all to hear.

There was a long silence and as you looked up you saw them all staring at you with guilt and sorrow.

"(Y/n) I'm so, so, so sorry I didn't believe you. I can't even explain..." the doctor said sadly, her eyes saddening with guilt.

"We all are. We're all so sorry" Yaz said, along with slight nodding from Graham and Ryan.

"Please...I just want to go home.." you whispered, your voice cracking slightly as a tear trickling down your cheek.

"(Y/n) I-" you cut the doctor off as you gave her a hard glare.

"Or do I have to beg for you to listen to me!" You shouted at her "because I've tried begging you to listen to no avail! Or do you want me to get on my knees and beg you to take me home because I will happily do that!" You seethed.

You stared at her, but she simply stared back, taken aback by your out burst. You breathed heavily, tears pooling in your eyes as your nails dig into your skin as you clenched fists, feeling blood as your nails cut your skin.

You stared at her for a little while longer and as she didn't move you shifted as you dropped onto your knees, placing your hands in front of you in prayer position, staring up at the doctor with pleading eyes.

"PLEASE! I can't stay here anymore..." you sobbed, tears falling from your eyes.

"(Y/n) please..." the doctor looked down to you knelt body, feet in guilt and sadness.

"NO! NO! You do not get the right to beg!" You screamed, standing up.

The doctor swallowed, taking a deep breath, she looked up to your broken and crying body.

"You didn't believe me. After everything we've all been through together.... I thought of you all as a second family... But you all thought I did it. To think that you all believe I'm capable of something like that..." You said sadly.

Everyone's gaze seemed to avert from you now in guilt. The tension in the air was so clear and the sadness sank your heart.

"I can't keep doing this. Please.... I just want to go home.." you whispered, your fists unclenching in defeat.

"I don't want you to go" the doctor whispered, still looking down.

"Please..." you begged, whispering quietly in defeat.

You heard nothing and sighed, walking past them all. Their eyes came up to your figure as you walked down from the console room and towards the corridors.

"I'm going to pack my bags. And when I come back I expect to be home!" You said sternly.

You didn't let any of them reply as you started to walk away, down the corridors to your room. As you came closer to your room your heart sank. You loved every trip you had with them but you couldn't simply carry on after all of this. You needed a break.

Your door came into view and you reached out for it, slowly turning the handle and opening it. As soon as you walked in you wanted to just lay in the soft comfortable bed and sleep. But you knew you had to get packing. Your eyes hurt like hell from all the tears and all you wanted right now was to be curled up in your bed at home away from the doctor and the others.

You walked over to your bed, crawling under and pulling out the bag and you started shoving everything inside. You didn't really care about anything, all your mind could focus on was stuffing all your clothes into the bag. You walked over to your desks, getting out your other bag and placing all your revision books inside.

You zipped up your bag and we're about to throw it in anger before your stomach rumbles. You hadn't eaten in ages and your stomach physically hurt now. But this was the least of your concerns right now and with your anger boiling up you snapped - at your own stomach.

"Not the time!" You shouted at your cramping stomach.

You sighed, placing your hands over your eyes. You sighed heavily, removing your hands when your attention was grabbed by the hat your loving mother gave you. You couldn't help the smile that played on your lips. You walked over to it, picking it up and relishing the feeling of the hat in your hands. You placed it on your head, breathing calmer now.

Turning around, you picked up your bags, looking around and making sure you didn't leave anything. You let a sad smile play on your features as you left your room.

Sobs left your lips as you passed every room. There were so many memories you'd made in every single one of the rooms. The TARDIS let out a sad sounding hum when you passed the music room.

"I'm sorry old girl. But I can't stay. At least... not for now. I just need some time..away from all this" you whispered, stroking your hand across the TARDIS walls as you walked.

You'd grown to love the TARDIS itself, just as much as the doctor and her friends...or so you thought.

You entered the TARDIS and didn't even stop to look at the others as you walked towards the TARDIS doors.

"(Y/n). I know it's not going to make a difference but I'm sorry. I truly am." The doctor said sadly.

You didn't really show any signs of acknowledgement although you listened to every word.

"I guess this is proper goodbye then..." the doctor mumbled.

You stopped dead in your tracks. Turning around you finally made eye contact with the doctor. How could anyone permanently give up the doctor?

"I'm not leaving for good" you said.

The doctors eyes seemed confused but also lit up a little with a glimmer of hope.

"I just...need some time that's all. Away from this all. Just a short break. Two weeks should do the trick. You could pick me back up after two weeks and we can forget about this incident" you smiled slightly.

The doctor seemed to look down a little, shifting her weight uncomfortably.

"How do I know you'll come back after the two weeks..." the asked, genuinely worried.

You sighed, walking over to her. She looked at you as you stared right back, smiling sadly. You took off your hat and stared down at it for a few seconds before handing it to the doctor.

"The hat my mum gave me at Paris. I'm coming back for that." You smiled as she took it.

"Two weeks?" The doctor asked, making sure.

"Two weeks. Then you can all come back and I'll hop back in with you all and we can carry on as though this never happened. I just...need this break..." you said, sighing.

The doctor nodded, holding your hat. You turned around and walked out of the TARDIS and back into your apartment. You closed the doors and turned around, watching as the time machine dematerialised in front of you, leaving you alone in your living room for the next two weeks.

Or so you thought...

A/n: don't worry guys this isn't the last chapter of the book. I can't give up writing that easily. But big changes coming up so keep reading!