Do You Remember? | t.h. | ✔️

27-

Recommended Song: Already Gone by Sleeping at Last

//Promises don't last forever, but forever can't exist without promises//

"Where did you get this?" You asked as you played with a corner of the letter. Andrew ran a hand through his short hair.

"It was in the bottom of this box." He said pointing to the box full of spices and teas.

Harrison, you thought. He had come over when you were packing up the kitchen to apologize for Tom again.

"I'm gonna-" You said pointing to your room.

"Yeah, I'll leave when I finish with this." He gestured to the box sitting on the counter. Andrew knew only pieces of what happened with Tom, you couldn't tell him everything, it just hurt too much.

You listened to the sound of your bare feet hit the floor as you walked back to your room. Your breathing was shaky, and you. Not this time, you thought trying to keep the memory at bay. You sat down on the mattress and opened the envelope, there was a sheet of paper with writing on it inside.

Dear y/n,

I want to preface this by saying that I am sorry. Sorry for all of the pain I put you though, sorry for kissing you that afternoon and I am sorry for leaving with no explanation. When Haz told me, he was going to your house one afternoon I knew that I had to write you since you won't return my texts or calls, and I don't blame you, I would be doing the same if I was in your shoes.

I really don't know where to start but here it goes. The reason I left so suddenly is, well I am afraid of hurting you again. I hated myself for what I did seven years ago, and I still do, I don't know what I would do with myself if I hurt you again. You deserve so much more, you deserve someone better than me. You deserve someone who won't have to pick up and leave for months at a time to shoot somewhere or go on a press tour. Now don't get me wrong, what we had was real, and if we lived in some alternate universe where I wasn't an actor who had to travel literally all of the time, I would never leave you.

I want to explain why I did what I did seven years ago. I made a stupid mistake, what I did still haunts me to this day, and if you don't believe that ask Haz. I only said those things because I was afraid of hurting you more later on. You aren't clingy, I didn't want you to leave me alone. I watched as my words hurt you, I instantly wanted to take everything back. I'm sorry, I was so stupid. At the time it seemed like the right thing to do but it wasn't, I didn't just break your heart that day, I broke mine too. I couldn't even look at your house without getting choked up, let alone thinking about you. Harrison tried to put me back together and so did Maia, whom I will talk about later, they helped but only you could made it whole again.

Now on to Maia. Maia and I had been together for a few months and I thought she was going to be able to fix me. I wanted it so bad I couldn't see who she really was, Haz had told me 'look mate she's using you.' Or 'look, mate, she isn't who you think she is.' He was right about her though, she was just using me for popularity and to think that I hadn't seen that from the start made me angry. I hated that my fame made people talk or act differently in front of me, or the fact that people would use me. With you it never was fake, if you had a problem with me you would voice it, you never used me, and hell, when we talked two months ago, were the same girl I fell in love with years ago.

I am sorry for leaving the hospital with no explanation, and I am sorry for not coming back. I originally left because I remembered Maia was coming out to visit. That's when I realized that Haz was right about her. I told her I was done and kicked her out which resulted in her trashing my old room and her Instagram living the whole thing. (to all 700 followers that are just as fake as her. lol.) I didn't come back because I had to go and shoot Avengers Endgame, (please don't tell anyone that is the title. Sony will fire me.) which means that I would not be able to see you for months. I made another mistake and left, I figured a clean break would be best. I'm sorry. I am writing this during my lunch break instead of going out with rest of the cast because I need you to understand, I never wanted to hurt you, and it kills me thinking that I hurt you again.

I understand that you will never want to talk to me again, but I needed to explain myself and my stupid actions. Also, Harrison misses you so please go and roast him for me.

I promise, I will always love you.

-Tommy

Is that ^^ a truth or lie? comment your decision!