Stress

5K 134 113
                                    

This is so bad I'm sorry
(Also there's a lack of pictures with Will crying)

———

When Will's shift at the infirmary finally ended, he made his way to his boyfriend's cabin, because it was nice, empty and dark.

Sadly though, Nico was not in his cabin when he got there. Still though, he dropped his stuff next to the door, and flopped on Nico's bed. Breathing in Nico's scent, he wiggled his way under the blankets and closed his eyes with a sigh of relief.

He didn't realize he was asleep until he felt someone taking their fingers through his hair, and he was slowly opening his eyes.

"Hey," Nico said softly, "are you okay?" Will hummed, scooching closer and wrapping his arms around Nico's waist, burying his face in Nico's side.

"I love you so much, Nico. You make me so happy." He mumbled. Nico smiled softly, caressing Will's cheek in his hand.

"I love you, too, Sunshine." Will looked up, and a small smile graced his face when he got to Nico's face. Nico moved so he was laying down, looking Will in the eye, his hand holding Will's.

"What's wrong?" He asked. Will's smile fell, and he hid his face in Nico's covers.

"I'm just so tired," He said into the black blankets, "I'm not okay, but everyone expects me to be okay. It's so hard to be happy all the time. And it's so stupid, because when people are panic-y they look at me to help them but I'm just an anxiety filled gay that feels pressure when people need me to make them feel better and so then I start panicking but I can let them no I'm panicking which only makes me panic more-"

"Will," Nico cut in, and Will looked up at him from under the blankets with tears in his eyes.

"I want people to see me as a person and not a miracle worker because then they just get disappointed and that's the worst feeling in the world, because they think it's my fault even though I tried so hard. They get mad at me for failing when I've done all I could, and it's so tiring."

"The stress is getting to you, love," Nico said softly, bringing Will's hand up and kissing them, "You need to take a break from the infirmary every now and then. You can't work yourself to death."

"I know," Will sighs, "but if I'm not in the infirmary I'm worried, and something always goes wrong when I'm not there. I'm- I'm really not trying to be mean but it feels like the people that work there are completely helpless."

"It's going to be o-"

"Don't," Will interrupted, tears falling as he looked at Nico, "Don't tell me it's going to be okay. People always tell me it's going to be okay, or things are going to be better, or that there going to be there for me. It's all lies, Nico. it's not okay, things don't get better, and people are going to move on because they get bored of dealing with my shit and I don't want to have hope anymore. I don't want to be let down again so don't tell me it's going to be okay," Will was full on crying now, sobs shaking his shoulders as he leaned into Nico, "I just need you to be with me, Nico. I want you to hold me and tell me you love me, please."

And Nico did, wrapping his arms around Will and pulling him closer, Will placing his head on Nico's chest, and Nico running his hand soothingly through Will's hair as he cried.

"I'm not going to tell you everything is going to be okay," Nico said quietly, once Will had stopped crying, "I'm not going to lie and tell you things you want to hear. You have depression, Will, most campers do, and it's not okay sometimes. It's hard to be happy and it's hard to see the importance of staying alive. Society has this way of categorizing people with no acceptions and if you don't fit in society's eye then," Nico trailed off, sighing, "but it is okay, sometimes. Sometimes it's easy to laugh and smile and just. . Be happy. And when you feel happy time seems to go faster and then you're not okay again. You just have to remember that's it's okay to not be okay and that you need to hold on to those happy times. As for people leaving. . I can promise you I'm not leaving any time soon. I- I love you so much, Will. I love you an I can't imagine my life with out you. I'm just- just. . Tickled pink when I'm with you, Will," Will giggled softly at his choice of words, and Nico smiled, burying his nose in Will's golden locks, "I don't want to be without you." Will relaxed into Nico's touch.

"I don't want to be with out you either, Nico. When I'm around you I'm tickled pink, too." Nico laughed, and Will smiled, grabbing Nico's hand and holding to his lips, "I'm really thankful I have you in my life, Nico. I can't tell you how lucky I am."

"I think I have a hunch, Sunshine."

"Can I stay here?" Will asked, "its crowded in my cabin, and I just want to be with you."

"Of course, Sunshine," Nico cooed softly into Will's hair, placing a gentle kiss to the top of his head. Will sighed in content, setteling further onto Nico, feeling a pleased type of tired as one of his boyfriend's hands ran through his hair and the other run soothing circles on his back. Soon enough, he was asleep, and Nico smiled lovingly at him.

Nico adjusted himself into a more comfortable position, carful not to wake Will, and was lulled asleep by Will's warmth and the small huffs of him breathing.

———

Don't sit there and tell me Will is happy all the time, okay,  sorry for the crapy, unedited chapter, much love.

(1011)

I Constantly Thank God For SolangeloWhere stories live. Discover now