the dark sapphire -Bucky Barnes-

36

Ally woke up from her sleep in a sweat. She had had a nightmare. She had seen Sean, Alexei, whatever his name was. They had been in a bunker, standing in an empty room. Sean's smile, a filthy evil smile, while Ally thrashed aggressively at another person, was on her mind. "That's enough, soldier. I think he's had enough" she had heard him say before she let go of the person covered in blood, who at the same time fell to the ground like a sack. "Turn away" Sean's voice sounded harsh, commanding, not as loving as she remembered it, but Ally had only nodded and had left the room, then she woke up.

She felt miserable because she realized it hadn't just been a dream, it was a memory, it had really happened and it hurt to see Sean's true character. She wondered who this person had been that she had fought against. She tried to remember a face, but only saw it blurred, covered in blood, which sent a chill down her body. Had she perhaps killed someone after all?

She turned to the side and automatically reached next to her bed, but remembered that she had fallen asleep without Bucky by her side. She still felt sick and shivered all over as she realized she was alone. No Bucky to hold her and tell her they would get through it, to stay up until she could sleep again, to reassure her that everything would be okay. She felt empty, abandoned, and so vulnerable that she felt sick.

She got out of bed, she just couldn't stay down without being so overcome by feelings that she became sick. She went to take a shower, waking her body up with cold water, because she wasn't going to sleep anyway, even though it wasn't even four in the morning. Then she went into the living room, lay down on the sofa and turned on the TV. Maybe she'd be able to sleep again if it wasn't quiet around her, she reflected as she zapped through the progams.

She had indeed fallen asleep again, although her sleep was neither restful nor deep, but rather restless and light, which is why she woke up when Sam entered the living room. She felt floppy, tired and still nauseous, but she smiled bravely at Sam when he wished her a good morning. They had breakfast together before Ally changed and knocked on Bucky's door.

There was no answer from inside, which is why Ally sighed before knocking again. "Bucky, I know you're inside. I just wanted to say that I'm going to work out now and I'd love for you to come too" she said disappointedly before walking into the living room with her head hanging.

"Still not better?" Sam asked when he caught sight of Ally. She shook her head. "Now he won't even answer me. I just don't understand it. I didn't do anything" Ally sighed "I'm going to work out now. Maybe my powers will work today" she said before leaving the room.

Sam looked after her with pity. He felt sorry for her because he knew he couldn't give her what Bucky gave her. Security, hope, the feeling that everything could be all right, protection. It couldn't go on like this. no matter what was going on with Bucky right now, whatever was making him react so strangely since their meeting about the file, Bucky had to pull himself together, for Ally, for himself, because they needed each other.

Determined, he walked to Bucky's room, knocked on the door, but like Ally, got no answer. Sam didn't let that stop him, however, and yanked the door open. Bucky, who had been sitting at his desk, staring at the wall with his head propped on his hand, looked up startled when Sam burst into the room.

"What do you want?" he asked, annoyed, turning away from Sam again. "To know what's wrong with you. Your behavior has changed abruptly and Ally is devastated because she doesn't know why. She feels like she did something wrong and is racking her brain about it. She slept on the couch tonight, looks totally wrecked and just doesn't know what to do. I don't know what's gotten into you, Bucky, but if you really care about Ally, get the hell out of your room and work it out with her."

Sam imperiously ordered Bucky. Bucky sadly lowered his head. "I can't. It is not possible. It's better the way it is right now" Sam stared at Bucky in disbelief. "Are you serious, Bucky? It's better the way it is?! What's better? That Ally doesn't sleep at night because you're not there? That you hurt her so much with your behavior that she blames herself?" Bucky swallowed the lump in his throat. It hurt to hear how much Ally was suffering, when all he wanted to do was protect her from more pain. Sam groaned as Bucky just continued to stare at the wall in silence. "I hope you come to your senses. It can't go on like this" he raised his index finger threateningly before angrily stomping out of the room and slamming the door behind him.

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