River.

Chapter 13: On the Hunt for Answers

I closed my eyes, enjoying his thrusts and how gentle he was being.

I dug my nails into his back and tried my best to hold back my moans.

He didn't say a word. It seemed as if he was only focused on pleasing me...which I loved of course.

"Cassidy." He suddenly said.

"Yes?" I replied.

"Cassidy." He said again confusing me for a second.

"Cassidy!" He yelled louder causing me to jump.

I opened my eyes and immediately saw Lindsay staring at me.

To be honest, I was a little disappointed but then again extremely relieved to see her. I didn't realize that I'd fallen asleep.

"Yea?" I asked as I rubbed my eyes trying to get my vision to unblur.

"Class is almost over. Why are you so tired? Did you not get any sleep last night?" She whispered trying not to disturb the rest of the class.

I looked at the front of the room and saw River presenting a power point of the human body to the class. He was wearing a white long sleeved button up shirt with black dress pants. His shirt sleeves were rolled up to his elbows and I caught a glimpse of a tattoo on his arm that I'd never noticed before. God... He was so attractive when he taught.

"Nope. Didn't sleep at all." I said to Lindsay.

It was Thursday and I still couldn't get what happened between me and River last week out of my mind. It was like an endless movie playing in my head. And the fact that I'd just had a sex dream about him didn't help at all. But then it hit me....

Was I really falling for River or was I just sexually attracted to him?

I began to think it was the second one but I needed to be sure.

All of a sudden an idea came to me. The perfect idea.

"Alright. Class dismissed." I heard River say, bringing me out of my thoughts. I watched him go into his office and a smile spread on my face.

"Uh oh. You just woke up and you're already smiling...that's never good." Lindsay stated with a worried look on her face.

"Relax Lindsay. I'm just in a good mood after finally getting some sleep. Could you wait for me outside? I need to talk to professor Carson about something." I said causing her to raise an eyebrow at me.

"You sure Cass?" She asked.

"Yea totally. I'll be out in a bit."

She turned to leave and I walked to River's office. I stopped right outside of his door and gave myself a pep talk.

"Okay Cassidy you can do this. Just go in there and let him know who's in charge. Don't let his amazingly good looks, freakishly gorgeous eyes, sexy ass deep voice, and perfect body distract you. And most of all, don't let that devilish smirk of his make you weak in the knees."

I face palmed myself after realizing just how much worse my pep talk was making this. I decided to stop talking to myself and just knock on his door.

"Come in." River said. I swear I thought I felt his voice vibrate through the walls. I took a deep breath, walked into his office and closed the door behind me.

He looked shocked to see me at first but his shocked expression quickly faded away.

"How may I help you?" He asked as he leaned back in his chair.

I ignored him, made my way behind his desk, and sat on his lap facing him.

I pressed my lips against his and kissed him as seductively as I could. I pulled away and slowly started grinding against him. After a few seconds he moaned and grabbed my hips. He began guiding my hips back and forth pulling me down making me grind harder onto him. Since I was wearing a skirt I could reeeeally feel him. I unbuckled his belt and unzipped his pants.

"Whoa, Cassidy...are you sure?" He asked.

"Honestly, I don't know." I replied.

I grinded against his now almost exposed hard on and let my head fall against his shoulder. Ecstasy filled my body. He groaned into my neck. I knew I was gonna drive him crazy by doing this...but I didn't expect to get turned on doing it. It felt sooo good. Before I could stop, I gave in to him.

"Take me. Please." I moaned.

I slid my hands down his briefs but he stopped me before I could go any further.

"Cassidy...I- I can't do this... I'm sorry." He said which threw me off guard completely.

"Why not?" I asked.

"Because, this isn't you." He stated with a concerned look.

"Yes it is...what do you mean?" I argued.

"No it's not sweetheart. The Cassidy I know wouldn't dare burst into my office like this and try to seduce me just to have sex with me. In fact, the Cassidy I know would've slapped the hell out of me for even thinking about having sex with her."

"What the hell!" I yelled frustratedly. "Why are you doing this?! You always flirt with me, last week you tried to fuck me, and a few days after that you kissed me even though I was with your brother!! How come now you all of a sudden don't wanna have sex with me?!"

I knew I sounded desperate but I promise I wasn't. I was just lost as to why he was acting all weird now that I actually wanted it.

"Trust me, I want nothing more than to have sex with you right now. However, I'm not gonna take advantage of you." He replied.

I was even more lost now.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that if I were to give in to what you want and have sex with you then I'd feel extremely guilty afterwards considering you're not in your right state of mind." He stated.

Did he just call me crazy? Oh hell no.

"Wait, so you're calling me insane now?" I asked obviously offended.

"I would never say such a thing. All I'm saying is that this isn't you...at all."

I looked down and bit my lip. He was right. This wasn't me.

"Don't feel bad. You're just confused about your feelings, I understand." He said as he pushed a stray piece of hair back behind my ear.

"I'm sorry." I apologized nearly on the verge of tears because I couldn't believe I'd actually let myself do something that stupid.

"Don't be. And please don't cry. I hate it when you cry." He replied with a soft tone in his voice.

He took his hands off of my hips and grabbed my hands.

"Would you be willing to let me take you out? It doesn't have to be a date if you don't want it to. I just want to get to know you. In fact, I'll let you choose where we go."

"Miami?" I asked.

"Anywhere you want." He chuckled.

I looked into his eyes and saw a completely innocent look in them.

"What if I want it to be a date?" I asked playfully.

"Then we'll make it a date." He stated. I couldn't help but smile when that infamous smirk grew on his face.

"You know." I began. "That smirk of yours drives me crazy."

"I know." He said. "Why do you think I do it?"

We laughed and I actually took the time to enjoy the moment. This was the side of him that I'd only seen once before. When he comforted me while I was crying last week. And honestly, this was my favorite side of him.

It was at that moment that I realized I didn't just want him because he was attractive, though his looks were a huge bonus, I was truly starting to fall for him.