The Hanes Enigma

Chapter Seven - Perforated

Min Yoongi

My head convulses as noise pounds against my cell door.

"Get the fuck up. Lazy shit..." A guard grumbles before trudging off, presumably to the next inmate who has overslept. I've missed breakfast. Again. I don't care. Again.

As I sit up, I wince, hands immediately going to support most of my weight. Daehyun is the same as he always was: possessive, selfish but relatively gentle. I can't say the same for his friends. One in particular, Naro, is decidedly not. He seems to take pleasure in seeing me limp the next day. I barely register the warm liquid that drips from my chin and falls onto the blanket, staining it temporarily dark with wet. I miss Jimin. And that hurts more than anything Naro does. I long to hold him in my arms again and have him kissing the tears from my cheeks, telling me that everything will be fine even though we both know that as soon as we stop ignoring the outside world, our little bubble will come crashing down and flatten us completely. I want my bubble back.

"I'm taking a shower. Come with me." Daehyun pokes his head around my door and I groan. "That's no way to say thank you. I have quite a few bruises because of you..." He glares.

"Ditto." I glare back pointedly.

He chuckles and hums in approval. "Your humour never changes, does it?"

"Not today, Daehyun." I let myself drop back down onto the thin mattress, not even wanting to move.

"Excuse me?." I can't see him, my back is to him with my forehead leaning against the cool of the stone wall. But I know he's glaring daggers. "You haven't thanked me in over a week, Yoongi."

"Then maybe remind your friends that I'm not a fucking sex toy. It hurts." I sound like a whining child and I make myself cringe. I feel the mattress sink behind me and my stomach clenches. I immediately regret my position.

His hand climbs up hip, making me shiver, and around to my chest before taking a hold of my throat. "But you are a toy. That's all you are."

I thrash to get away from him. His grip is not so tight that I can't breathe, but enough to make me feel lightheaded. And definitely enough to make me certain that I will have yet another bruise for guards to pretend they don't notice. Daehyun and his friends seem to have a deal with the warden. It doesn't matter what they do, beat up the people who come at me or fuck me against a wall, no one notices.

"Tell me what you are, Yoongi." He chuckles as I pull desperately at his fingers.

"N-No." My teeth are gritted tightly together and I can't help the grunt as Daehyun's hand closes slightly.

"Tell me what you are." He growls in my ear and my stomach churns. I hate it. It feels so wrong to have any of them so close to me. This isn't easy anymore. I used to find this so easy. Why isn't it easy?. I almost laugh at myself as hot tears brim at my eyes once again. I know exactly why. I hadn't known Jimin before. He should be the only one who talks in my ear like that. He should be the only one to be allowed anywhere near as close to me as this. "I'm waiting. Or would you like me to get Naro in? I hear you had a lot of fun yesterday... I'm sure he could remind you of what happens if you don't obey."

I gulp back a sob but it doesn't work, the pathetic noise still somehow escaping my cracked lips. "I-.. I'm a toy..."

His grip on my throat immediately goes slack and I sob into my forearms as I curl into a ball, practically feeling myself breaking more every day. "Good. Like I said, I'm going for a shower. Don't take too long, okay?" He smacks my butt, making me wince. I let myself cry for five more seconds before wiping furiously at my eyes. That's enough, now. Get a fucking grip and do what you have to do. My jaw clenches as I sit up, suddenly eerily emotionless. I blink down at my hands as I watch them steady, no longer shaking. I haven't felt like this in years; as if I've locked all my emotions inside my head. I push myself onto my feet and allow a moment to regain my balance before silently following Daehyun. Is this what it felt like before? Was I this broken when Jimin found me?

***

Park Jimin

I bite my lip nervously, leg shaking with agitation.

"Park Jimin?" The lady at the counter calls and I practically run to the desk. "I'm afraid he's refused to see you again."

My heart sinks to the floor and beats pitifully on the dull, sandy tiles. I register a tear leaving damp on my t-shirt and the lady looks at me sympathetically. "Why does he keep saying no?.."

It's not addressed at anyone, but I presume the woman feels obligated to answer. "Jimin, maybe you should take the hint..."

I frown and look back up at her. "What hint?"

"He replied once... And he's refused to see you countless times... Maybe he doesn't feel that way anymore..?" She gently pats my hand but I pull away quickly.

"No. That's not it. I make him happy! He just doesn't want to-.. I don't understand why he doesn't want to be happy... Even if it's just for a moment..." Multiple teardrops join their leader on my shirt and the woman looks slightly panicked, unsure what to do.

"Maybe you've answered yourself? He can't let himself if it's just for a moment?" She awkwardly hands me a box of tissues which I gratefully accept.

"That makes sense... Is my wanting to see him selfish, then?" My eyes widen, suddenly scared that yet again I've unwittingly made Yoongi's life worse for my own benefit.

"Okay, kid. I don't know what happened between you but you seem so sure he still loves you... And you clearly love him. I'm going to give you some advice, but you can't ever tell anyone that it was me who told you. Okay?" She raises her eyebrows, voice now a mere mutter.

I nod solemnly and she sighs, looking around to make sure no one is within earshot.

"I see it all the time. A guy goes in and leaves the person he loves outside. He thinks he's protecting them, sometimes it's from their own sadness, other times they think they're not good enough, whatever... But it breaks them. Completely. Whether they're right or wrong, they always come out so... scarred." She bites her lip nervously and then grabs a pen. "I didn't tell you give you this name but talk to him about deflective charms. Then, in your next letter, tell that guy that next time you're here, you won't leave until he sees you. If he does still love you, he won't want you to be here overnight, believe me. Then you promise me, you'll do anything you can to make him happy again. You don't let him break like the rest of them."

My bottom lip wobbles as I nod. "You had someone, didn't you? Someone who broke..."

She purses her lips and I see a slight shine in her eyes. "Why do you think I'm here? I still do..."