My civilisation (D.D)

Thirty four: Negative attitude.

"Though' I smelled smoke." A familiar redneck spoke.

I didn't even have to look behind me to know it was Daryl approaching me.

Sighing I moved up as he plonked himself next to me and held his hand out.

I granted the rednecks wish and placed a cigarette in his hands before he lit it with my old Matt black lighter I found at the Prison.

He placed the cigarette between his lips and inhaled as he turned to face me.

"How much sleep did yer get last nigh'?"

I shrugged looking of into the distance.

"Baby yer need to start lookin' after yerself."

"Don't baby me Dixon." I grinned shaking my head as he held his hands up in surrender.

"Why ain' yer sleepin'?"

"Well-"

"And no bullshit stories Ophelia."

"Because I always see my brother...I miss him."

His face softening he chucked the cigarette to the floor and put his hands on both sides of my waist and pulled me up onto his lap.

He wrapped his arms around my stomach and leant his chin on top of my shoulder.

"I see Merle sometimes. Memories. Tha' wha' yer see? Memories?"

"Yeah I do." I sighed.

"It don't last forever. But when they wouldn' stop I began to enjoy 'em."

"You enjoyed the reminder of them being gone forever?"

"Not forever."

"Your religious?"

"Nah. But there's gotta be somewhere ou' there where we go when we're gonners."

Smiling I put one of my hands on the side of his face and leant further into his chest.

"I hope your right."

"Anyway...I'd rather see memories of Merle than never see 'em at all. I didn' like the dreams 'cos there a reminder he ain't comin' back. But yer can't change tha' and so I figured migh' as well enjoy the dreams, it's the only way I'm gonna see him for a while."

"What memories do you dream of?"

Silence.

Shit maybe I shouldn't have asked that.

"Sorry- I didn't mean to be a nosy bitch-"

"We were bou' 14. Campin' in the forest trackin' some deer. We would go ou' and camp every few weeks and old Merle would teach me how to hunt and track. Go' $1 for every squirrel, $5 for every possum and I got myself $50 for a deer. When I caugh' a deer with my crossbow for the first time Merle gave up his crack for a whole week. Said he was the proudes' big brudder ever."

Smiling I held my hands over his and kissed his cheek slowly as I took a deep breath.

He smelled of raspberries and Cherries although he hadn't showered yet and I felt fucking jealous I would smell of BO after a day of walking. Well maybe I was being paranoid but that's not the point.

"Merle was a good man."

"He kidnapped yer."

"This world has made us all do bad things but it doesn't make us bad people. He only did it because he wanted to find you. I get that."

"I got really lucky with yer." He chuckled pulling me closer against his chest and leaving a trail of kisses on my face and neck.

Smirking I winked at the redneck and chuckled slightly as I spoke.