Examination rooms at an OBGYN's office are full of happy parents with their babies. Every time I come, I like looking at the pictures and I imagine putting a picture of the three of us in a frame and gifting it to Dr. and Mr. U. Seeing those pictures always makes me hopeful.
Mom is sitting on a chair; she is playing a game on her phone. We are waiting for the results of the blood work. I am holding my kitty and humming to Strawberry. I lay on the examination table in a thin paper robe, open to the front. I am completely naked under the robe. It always makes me feel exposed and vulnerable.
Since I am a few days away from 15 weeks, Dr. U is also doing a screening for things like Down syndrome. I am a little scared, but she said there was no reason to suspect any problems. Thank goodness Mom was here because she was able to help me with the family history and the genetics portion of the exam. Unfortunately, we have no information for Zee. We will not get results for the screening until the next visit.
"Mom, do you think it is taking a long time?"
"I think so, honey. They must be busy."
"I am nervous. Do you think there is something wrong with Strawberry?"
"Sweetheart, being a little late does not mean there is something wrong with Strawberry. It just means they are a little late."
"Mom, can I have a hug? I am feeling scared and a little funny."
"Of course, baby."
Mom came and sat on the examining table with me and put her arms around me.
"How are you feeling funny?"
"Tired, and dizzy. It is hard to think. Don't they call this pregnancy brain?"
Mom laughed.
"Darling, you have way more than pregnancy brain going on in here."
She pointed to my head. My family loves to tease.
"Try to relax baby. I am here. Do you want me to teach you some songs that I sang to you as a baby?"
I like that idea a lot and I nod to her. I don't want to talk because I can't trust my voice. What she said was so moving. I love the idea of singing family songs to Strawberry. Maybe one day they will sing them to their child.
Mom begins singing. I know these songs. We both put our hands on my pregnant belly and sing together. The funny feeling gets worse, but I keep singing. I can feel sleep pulling me under. I'm just going to take a little nap.
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Lost Alpha
RomantikkNuNew spent 5 years loving a man who never reciprocated. His entire college career was spent pining for an alpha male. Not anymore! After graduation, I am done. I am going to find someone who loves me. One year passed like this. NuNew did not find...
