Shadows of Love

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After what happened at the GuanYin Temple, when the Cultivation world was rocked by terrible revelations, and those who were trusted became scandalous rogues overnight, criminals instead of heroes, and the Yiling Patriarch was no longer a bad guy supposedly, things became far more murky.

Instead of solid lines drawn in the dirt, where something was good and something else was bad, confusion added to rumours and the situation was made worse.

Now, Wei Ying did not mind this.

He was used to people slandering him anyway and he tried not to let it affect him. In that, he was in control of his own mind and for the most part, he ignored those that wanted to outright harm him.

He thought there was a lot of smoke without fire and Wei Ying began to get restless.

He wasn't even sure why he was feeling this way; there wasn't anything definitely to blame. No reason he could attribute to feeling unwanted.

Lan Zhan, in the beginning, told him that it wasn't safe for Wei Ying to wander about, especially if people still regarded him as a threat.

But as the days went by, and Lan Zhan began spending more time away from him, Wei Ying began to feel as if he was a burden.

Maybe this was in part due to how he'd been raised in Lotus Pier; Madam Yu certainly never held back, telling him how grateful he should be not to still be out on the streets.

And Lan Zhan never said anything that amounted to a direct request to stay, and these days because of XiChen retiring to a life of seclusion, he was busier than ever. His days began when Wei Ying was asleep and he sometimes even arrived later back to the Jingshi, so that Wei Ying had fallen asleep.

There were night hunts with the ducklings, and Wei Ying spent time with SiZhui, but the shadows around his Soul became ever darker.

One day, Wei Ying had a run in with an angry Uncle Qiren.

Like a string pulled too tight, Wei Ying stood in front of the older man, listening to him read down a memorised list of everything he deemed was wrong with Wei Ying and he knew the time had come to leave.

The tears…they came anyway.

Wei Ying was used to things being given to him and then just like that, those same things were whisked away, as if the person who gave them to him was living in regret.

And Wei Ying understood that out of all the emotions in the world, that was the one he would not be able to see in Lan Zhan's eyes.

It would kill him.

So he walked quickly to the Jingshi, brushing away too much moisture that had no business gathering in his eyes.

He was looking down and didn't see SiZhui, who was coming towards him.

"Xian-Gege…. What's wrong?" The boy says.

Wei Ying is mortified.

He doesn't want to explain. For him, it is a common occurrence and it would be humiliating to have to tell the kid that he himself isn't wanted around any longer.

So what if Uncle Qiren had been shocked at his hasty exit, it wasn't as if the words once spoken could be erased.

So he plants the biggest smile he can manage on his face and refuses to make eye contact, because that would give the game away.

He pretends he's tired of staying here, in a place that might have welcomed him before, but now he knows without a doubt that it was only a dream. A mirage that existed only in the dessert of his mind.

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