CLASSROOM OF THE ELITE: OnE ShOTs

A spring without you is coming...

I reached out to the stain, touching it as I felt a tear roll down my cheek; I glanced at the man beside me, he too was crying as his lips quivered at the sight of her physical despondence .

"Hahh... this, is harder than I thought..." I sighed with a lot of ache in my heart, this feeling of loss crept up on me as I looked over at the recording on my other hand... one which I should play when I finish reading the letter. 

"I-I can't even continue... Hahh..." The man sighed with a lot of disheartened emotions piling up, his eyes were downcast as he tried to suppress more and more of his tears...

[Please don't cry, I would never want to see you cry, I want to see you smile. The irony of my wish being that you can't, but please do, in my absence please smile for me.

So when I look at you and protect you, I know I still rest within your heart.]

"Hahh... this I getting harder." I muttered as I I silently scanned the next line, and the next line and the next line.

The man beside me was rendered silent, his tears were enough to tell me what was in his mind; no words were needed, his tears were enough to tell me about what he felt.

Nonetheless I continued, the smile now etched onto my face  as I tried to steer away from crying; the feeling of distraught no longer racking up my brain. It is what she would have wanted, If only she didn't write out such a letter to us.

[Please understand what I wish for you, what I yearn for you is something that I never knew I wanted until I realised it was something I needed to help you achieve...

I hate that I won't be there to see it in person...

But I am also happy that I will always be able to see it, it is my eternal gift, something that only you can give to me...

For that I am happy, even if I am not there anymore you will still be okay; you won't lose anymore. You will only lose me...

I don't want you to lose me...

I don't want to lose you...

I want to stay...

I want to live with you...

I want to love you...

I am so sorry that I can't do that, I am sorry a million times over. I am sorry from the bottom of my heart that I won't be there with you anymore.]

I stopped as tears ran down my face, my lips quivered like his did as those droplets landed on the piece of paper in my hand.

"A-Are you going t-to be ok?" He asked me, stuttering as he did so, his voice of worry was mixed with tremendous sadness and loss; the same feelings I felt inside my heart.

"I will be, I will be alright, don't worry." I responded with a hoarse tone, the feeling of loss communicating itself within my speech; my words only caused his worry to worsen as he placed a hand on my shoulder. 

"I'll be here if you need me ok?" He announced to me his reassurance, his smile returned as he focused his attention back to the letter in my hand.

[I know we only spent a limited amount of time together, but those times were the best I could have asked for. I am grateful to you for allowing me to indulge in my selfishness, even thought it was sacrificing your own feelings...

I want to thank you for everything, I wan to say thank you for everything you tried to give me, even when you didn't realise you gave me everything...

I want to thank you for giving me what I didn't know I could have for this past year, when we first met...