ROADTRIP || ships and shit (oneshots)

JACKLYN || Falling Apart

|| Falling Apart || TEN

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Brooklyn -

Sitting on the cold cemented step in the middle of the garden, I watch as the steam off my tea floats. I was wearing just a t-shirt and jeans, so my skin was cold as ice. But in all honesty I couldn't feel it, nor did I really care. My knees were close to my chest and I just sat there taking in the silent atmosphere.

It was the middle of the night and I just couldn't sleep. My mind was going a mile an hour, but my heart was at a steady pace. I felt almost numb but I felt everything as well.

It had been so hard these last couple of months. Lying to the fans. Watching them speculate and spread rumours. Ones that were ninety percent true. But what was harder was watching your best friend drift away.

When he told me he was leaving at first I was shocked. Surprised that he wanted to go solo. Then I was angry, angry that he was leaving us, leaving me. Then I was terrified, what would happen to us, what would happen to our friendship. And now, now I was just upset. I felt him slipping away and I couldn't do anything about it.

Taking a sip of my tea, I didn't realise someone had come over. Until I heard his voice, "Brook, what you doing out here? It's fucking freezing." I look up at him with tired eyes. He had a blanket over his hoodie covered shoulders. And sweats to cover his legs.

I simply shrugged, I felt him sigh and sit down next to me. He draped the blanket over my shoulders, so we shared the fuzzy fabric. "What's going on?" Jack asked. I look down at my mug and take another sip, the hot liquid stinging the back of my throat but soothed other pains.

"Is it about me leavin'?" I shyly nod. He sighs again but this time it was more sad. He wrapped his arm around my waist and hugged me side on. "We still gonna meet you know, I'm not leavin' you that easily."

"I know, but it wouldn't be the same." He dropped his head on my shoulder and started to stroke his thumb against the exposed skin of my back. "We won't spoon like we used to, we won't have our weird jamming sessions on live, we won't have me randomly moaning as you slap me." Jack chuckled at that last one. Images flashing through my head as I say the words.

"Yeah, but we can still do all those things just A little less."

"No we won't." I say sadly. I felt him lift his head. I look to the side to see him confused. "You have Kirsty to spoon. You'll have other artists to jam with and I don't know about the last one but still..." Jack's face dropped into a sad realisation. It was inevitable, me and Jack would somehow fall apart. It happened with Mikey and Rye.

So why couldn't it be with us as well. "I'm scared, you know?" Jack's eyes lifted to look into mine. "Why?"

"Because one day I'm going to lose you, and I feel like that day may come sooner rather than later." I felt my eyes fill up with tears as I listen to the truthful words that fall out of my mouth. "You're not gonna lose me Brook, I won't let it."

I sigh, "you can't know that I won't." I look to the front, as I feel Jack's head dropping onto my shoulder again. "Can we just sit here then? Until the sun rises." Jack whispers. I place my head on top of his. "Like we used to?"

"Yeah."

***

Third -

Andy looks out of the kitchen window as he washes his dirty plates, he sees his two friends sitting out in the garden, cuddled up together and he softens his features. It had taken a toll on everyone, after Jack announced his departure. But it was harder for Brook, he was the only one to not post about Jack, to look the most upset when he had to talk about the brunette on live. To secretly get a tattoo to remind himself of the Irish lad, when Jack was out of the room.

It felt strange to Andy, knowing that two of his closest friends had left their dream of becoming a famous boyband. That would travel the world together, that would sell out stadiums and meets so many different people. But now it was the original three and Sonny. They all knew each other for a really long time and it felt weird knowing now that they won't spend a lot of time with Jack anymore. With Mikey though he saw it happening months before he announced his leaving.

But that's how life goes, people leave and do things that make them feel happy and not what they are supposed to do to make others happy. Jack just needed to do what made him happy and not be stuck in a place where he had to do something he didn't want to do anymore.

***

Brooklyn -

"I'm going to miss you." I whisper into the air. My breathe evident as I breathe out.

"I'll miss you too Brooks." Jack squeezed my sides tighter as we saw the sun shine through the leafless trees. I know this is the right thing for him, but I'm still scared of us falling apart.

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