Fear (JeffMads)

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Thomas-oh sorry, I mean Thadia, sat inside her inside her best friend and crush's car as he ran inside his house to grab his wallet. Thadia pulled the sun visor down and flipped the mirror, dissatisfied with what she saw. She was definitely not out, everybody still called her Thomas and she hadn't shaved her beard or taken hormones or anything, she was afraid to. But she didn't know how much more of this she could take, the emotions hurt more and more every day, the misgendering killed her.

James entered the car so she flipped the visor up, "You okay there?" He asked, setting his wallet in the driver side cup holder.

"Just dandy," Thadia replied, looking out the window as James began to drive them to some pub they had decided to spend the night at. Thadia looked at every person she saw on the way there, jealous that they looked so happy while she was stuck with hiding her misery day in and day out.

"We're here, Thomas," James said. Thadia stopped herself from cringing and got out of the car, she really needed a drink now. James asked if she was okay again but she ignored him and went inside, going straight to the bar and ordering shots.

It took awhile but Thadia managed to get drunk, she wasn't a lightweight so it took half of forever to even get tipsy. She sat on the bar stool and sighed, ignoring everybody until a hand landed on her shoulder, she turned to see James, "Hey let's get out of here." He said. Thadia nodded and almost fell off onto him but he caught her, "Whoa!"

"Sorry.." She slurred, her legs felt like jelly so she just let him hold her up. James shook his head and staggered with Thadia out of the pub and outside, sitting on the curb outside with her.

"Is something bothering you, Thomas?" James asked, looking over at Thadia with a gentle gaze.

Thadia shook her head, "My name isn't Thomas." She said, too inebriated to stop herself from everything she'd struggled so hard to keep concealed for years.

"What do you mean?" James chuckled thinking this was coming from the alcohol, "What'd you do? Steal somebody's identity?"

Thadia crossed her arms and shook her head, "I'm...a girl." Before James could question it she added, "I'm trans, James." She told him, her face red from the alcohol consumption.

"I'm sorry WHAT?!" James turned to look at her, Thadia put her head on her knees as she slowly realized what she'd said.

"Forget it." She said quietly hoping she could put this whole fiasco behind her and keep living her lie of safety.

"Y-You're a girl?" James asked shell shocked. Thadia nodded knowing she was about to be rejected by the one person she'd ever genuinely liked in her life, "What-What's your name?" He asked quietly.

"Thadia..." She whispered quietly into her knees.

She felt an arm around her shoulders that pulled her until her head plopped onto a shoulder, James's shoulder, "You should've told me." He whispered, "I've been dead naming you..."

"I was scared." Thadia whispered, "I-I really like you." She mumbled before passing out.

James chuckled, "I like you too." He said before picking her up and slipping her into his passenger seat, buckling her up and then gently shutting the door.

Thadia woke up the next day and yawned before she realized she was on James's couch with a pillow and blanket, she sat up and stretched, "James?" She called, putting a hand over her mouth as she yawned again to realize her mouth didn't have any hair over it.

James walked in and handed her a cup of coffee, "Morning Thad." He said and kissed her forehead making her blush.

"Am I still dreaming?" She asked quietly, sipping the coffee and looking at James suspiciously.

James shook his head, "Just hungover." He replied.

"...what happened last night?" She asked in fear, not remembering anything and already regretting everything.

"You told me." James replied simply, "And now I want to know if you'd like to be my girlfriend." He sipped his coffee again.

Thadia blushed even harder and almost dropped her mug, "Wh-What?!" She asked in shock, part of her thinking she'd just heard incorrectly.

James shrugged, "Well you like me and I like you so the next step is to go on a date, right?" He asked.

Thadia nodded, "I guess." She then realized what that meant and took James's hand, "Y-You're fine with..."

James kissed her forehead again, "As long as you don't have a beard." He replied making Thadia laugh.

"Deal."

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