carolina |H.S.|

0.90

Sienna pov
We've hand Brantley for about two month now he's gotten better with feeding but I feel like I've gone down a spiral for this, basically hanging by a thread, but I'm doing my best acting as is everything is fine and my mental health is deteriorating by the second from postpartum depression.
"Hey how are you doing Si, be honest with me." Harry tells me knowing that I'm not doing that well.
"Fine." I say and stay laying in the bed.
"No you're not, Brantley not feeding and him being colic has taken a toll on on your mental health." He getting into the bed laying down next to me hugging me. "Maybe we should take you to the doctor Sienna, I think you have postpartum depression. Brantley has been getting better with feeding and sleeping."
"I know."
"I'm gonna call for a appointment for you I don't want you to get worst."
"Okay." I say getting up and looking at Brantley who is just laying in the crib sleeping for once.
"I'm gonna go workout do you wanna come with me it could be fun to do it together and it could help." He says holding his hand out for me to follow him. I grab it and walk downstairs with him bringing the baby monitor as we walk into the home gym. I work out with him and it helps a little I definitely feel happier but I leave when I go upstairs to Brantley crying. I feed him seeing he is eating and not gagging anymore, it made me happy to see. Working out definitely provided me with some serotonin even if it was only 30 minutes but I'm bringing Brantley down with us to lay on his tummy time mat, so I could finish the workout with Harry, he took a quick break to see Brantley while I continued to do squats, soon walking over to use Brantley as my weight during them. Watching him smile and make faces at me made me beyond happy. I carried b back upstairs keeping him on my hip while I cleaned and Harry was on his run. "You're my little boy aren't you." I say as I hold him up on the counter watching him smile and make random faces and noises at me. He soon became fussy and I knew it was time to feed him, I burped him and he spit up a lot and I knew his acid reflux was acting up again, I kept burping him for another 15 minutes before holding him until he fell asleep on my chest.
"Hey two out of my three favorites." Harry says walking into the house.
"Hi, go shower I can tell that you are covered in sweat."I tell him pointing upstairs.
"Okay, okay I'll be back in 5 minutes." He says kissing my cheek before going to go shower.
"Good smelly boy." I tell him seeing Brantley starting to wake up. "Good morning my other boy." I say to Brantley kissing the top of his head bringing him upstairs to change his diaper. He puts up a fight the whole time I'm trying to change him out of his pjs. "You can't be in just a diaper B." I tell him in my baby voice, kissing his head, trying my best to put on his new clothes eventually getting them on.
"Does the little one not want to wear clothes just like his daddy." Harry says chuckling in just a towel wrapped around his waist
"Harry! Go put on clothes." I say lightly swatting his chest.
"Go take a break before we need to get Luna." He says taking Brantley into his music room.
I shower washing my hair for the first time in a while. Using it as time to relax hoping the boys are surviving alone right now. I got back downstairs seeing Harry and Brantley sitting on the couch, Harry telling him about want he does for a job.
"What are my two favorite boys doing." I say walking over to the seeing Brantley's eyes looking for my voice. "Hi little one." I say before looking at Harry.
"I'm happy to have you back, to you're happy self." He says kissing the top of my head.
"Thank you,for helping me out of this funk."
"Well I think we could go get Luna then go for a walk around the park. Bring the stroller that has the seat for Luna."
"That would be nice,I think this little one would enjoy it." I say looking at B.
"Come on it time to go get miss Luna bug." He says and I put B into his car seat carrying it out to the back of the car, while Harry started the car. Soon we were off to go get Luna from kindergarten, we had music softly playing while B slept knowing car rides helped him go to sleep.
"Hi mommy, daddy and baby B." Luna says as she hops into her car seat.
"How was school bug." He asks her.
"It was fun." She says before looking at Brantley who was sleeping still. "He's sleeping mommy."
"I know and we are gonna go to the park and walk." I tell her while Harry drives to the park.
"Yay I'm excited, when does dance start again I miss it."
"Soon babes, soon."
"Daddy play your album I wanna hear golden please." She says and he glances at me and I press play on golden. "Hey dadada." She starts singing making both us start smiling and chuckling at how much she loves golden. We arrive at the park and I set B into his car seat gently making sure that I don't wake him. Luna holds Harry's hand while I push the stroller, Luna tells Harry all about her school day while we walk to the playground. We go home two hours later and I make dinner and then feed Brantley before his sponge bath. I rock him to sleep and get into bed with Harry who was on Luna duty knowing she doesn't put up a fight with him like she does with me.
"What have your fans reaction been to you announcing you're not available for them anymore."
"They are happy for me but are shocked that we are parents."
"I don't want you to go on tour." I say resting my head on his chest.
"You could always go with me."
"But Luna has school and Brantley is still so little."
"Homeschool Luna and by the time tour starts Brantley will be 4 months."
"I know I'm think about it I would much rather be with you instead of here alone."
"Let's get some sleep before little B starts screaming." He says hugging me into his chest kissing the top of my head allowing me to fall asleep.
12 am
"Mommy, mommy." Luna says shaking me awake.
"Yes baby."
"I don't feel so good." She says and I get out of bed bringing her into the bathroom while she empties her stomach.
"You might have the stomach bug again." I say feeling her forehead which was burning hot.I brought a bucket into her room and some water. I stayed in her room until Brantley started crying and it was time to feed him.
"Luna's sick, do you wanna sit with her while I feed him." I tell Harry.
"Yes I'll go." He says getting up walking into her room.
"Sissy is sick buddy, let's get you back to sleep now baby." I say laying him down in the crib going back into Luna's room seeing her still being sick almost worst than the last time. We stay with her bringing her downstairs to the couch putting on a tv show, knowing that I'm gonna call the doctor when they open to see if she had something worst than the stomach bug. I had eventually gotten her to fall sleep. I kept a bucket close by just in case she got sick Harry stayed upstairs with Brantley. Luna woke up at 6 sicker and I had Harry watch her while I tried to feed b but he put up a fight and cried. I brought him downstairs knowing this was gonna be a long exhausting day. I sat downstairs next to Harry on the other side of Luna with B sleeping in his pack and play.
"Do you think it's just the stomach bug or something worse." He asks me
"I'll take her temperature when she wakes up and give her something small to eat and see how she handles food." I tell him leaning on his shoulder. I stay rested on his shoulder until Luna starts to wake up feeling sick again and I bring her to the bathroom and let her empty her stomach. "Lunes is it just your tummy hurting or do other things hurt too."I ask her.
"Just my tummy but right here hurts." She tells me pointing to where her appendix is.
"Can I touch your tummy baby and see if we need to go to the doctor." I ask her and she nods while I gently press her stomach to see that her abdomen is tender knowing it most likely is her appendix not a stomach bug. "I'm gonna talk to daddy after we put you back on the couch." I say carrying her and walking over to Harry who is in the kitchen. "I think it's her appendix." I tell him.
"Should we wait a bit or are we taking her to the doctor." He asks me
"I feel like we should wait because she isn't complaining about the pain in her side being super bad she just keeps throwing up."
"I'll make her some toast and get some water for her."
"Ok, I'll go sit by her and check on Brantley since he's gonna wake up soon and need to be fed and have a diaper change."
I walk over to Luna and see her laying on the couch with her eyes closed, I then walk over to the pack and play and see Brantley looking up at me smiling. "Come on buddy let's go change your diaper." I talk to him in a baby voice, carrying him to the changing table, I feed him too before going back out to Luna and Harry. He's trying his best to get her to eat but she's refusing him like she does me. "Lunes will you try and eat something for us please or even just drink you're water." I ask her and she nods and takes a sip of water before eating a bite of toast. Her pain in her stomach eventually started to get worse so we brought her to the hospital so they could figure out what's wrong. We had brought Brantley with us best he was in his nap time stage and this is when I wished one of our parents lived close to us in case of emergencies like this. We waited in Luna's room for her lab results to tell us what is wrong with her.
"Hi mr and Mrs. Styles, you're daughters is gonna need her appendix out, we have her scheduled to go back soon. Here's a gown and a hairnet a nurse will be in to give her an iv shortly." The doctor says and I thank him taking the gown and hair net bringing Luna into the bathroom to change her.
"Mommy I'm scared." She tells me with tears in her eyes.
"I know baby, but you're gonna take a quick nap and then we can go home tomorrow morning baby. Me or daddy will stay with you tonight." I say wiping her tears kissing the top of her head, bringing her back out to the hospital bed. A nurse came in and hooked her up to an Iv Harry sitting on her bed talking to her distracting her from moving her hand away.
"Good job bug, you're the bravest girl I know." He tells her kissing her head. Soon Luna was wheeled back into the operating room while Harry and I stayed in the waiting room, but I left to go feed Brantley in the car and went right back to the waiting room leaving Brantley wrapped around on my chest. Luna was in recovery and we were just waiting for her to wake up, knowing she'd be groggy and probably hungry. Today was way more exhausting than it should have been.
"Good afternoon bug." He tells her as she starts to open her eyes rubbing the tiredness out of them.
"Hi daddy, where's mommy."
"I'm right here Luna don't worry baby." I say kissing her forehead. "Do you want daddy to stay tonight and I'll be here first thing in the morning with Brantley." I ask her knowing she's a daddy's girl all the way. She nods and I kiss the top of her head sitting with her for the last few hours during visiting hours. "Bye lunes, I'll see you tomorrow sleep well darling." I say giving her a light hug before kissing her head again and saying Goodnight to Harry and getting the keys for the Range Rover. "I guess it's just you and me tonight brant." I say as I buckle him into his car seat starting on our way back home.