♡
She loved him too much it frightened her. 'This is the price I have to pay' she thought. Ava knew that the ideal and impeccable phase was too good to be true. All this time, she tried her best to be a great companion for him. Supporting him, loving him, trusting him and giving him everything she could. Jordan was a wanted guy, by many, many being an understatement. She thought back to what Tayler said about the fans.
"And what about your fans?" She began, her lip quivering.
"What about them?" he questioned.
"Don't they deserve to be in my spot?".
" Ava, please don't start with that again".
" I'm sorry, I can't help it Jordan" she answered as tears began to form again.
"Look, sweetheart, I love them. And without them, I wouldn't be living the dream with the guys. I'm not trying to brag but there are a lot of girls out there that like me. But they'll get over it at one point" he reasoned.
'That's a little harsh' she thought.
"I doubt it" she blurted out.
"Sorry" she added right after.
"Well it's not impossible" she murmured but he heard.
"What's not impossible?" he asked tilting his head to the side.
"A fan dating you" she clarified.
"No it's not" he agreed.
"But it's not easy".
Ava didn't respond.
"And besides, I'm sure that they want me to be happy. I want them to be happy too. They'll go on and marry one day. Of course, my bond with them will stay the same" he continued.
"I feel guilty. I feel like you're hiding me. Cause you don't want to hurt them. I don't want to hurt anybody" she rambled but he pulled her into him, embracing her trembling form.
"You're breaking my heart baby. Don't think so much. I don't like to see you like this" he told her.
He was right. She was thinking too much, so much that a migraine had begun to form. She had been feeling everything and nothing ever since the dreadful conversation at work. Ava felt like she was going to lose her mind and her head was going to burst.
"Why do you hide me?" she questioned her voice monotone. Pain pooled in her eyes as she spoke.
Jordan was pained by the question. He didn't like to think that he was hiding her. He always thought of it as protecting her from getting hurt by the limelight. Sweet Ava wouldn't be able to handle it. He wanted to keep her all to himself. Shield her away from the cons of having almost the whole world knowing about your life.
"Sweetheart-, I'm not hiding you" he began as she shook her head in disagreement.
"Yes, you are. I know that I have always been understanding of your situation, but that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt. You only show me affection behind closed doors. In the eyes of the public, you're still single. Is this the way it's always going to be? " she finished.
She pondered for a moment.
' I probably sound like Tayler right now'.
"S-Sorry, forget it" she stammered as she turned her back to him feeling a little uneasy.
Jordan didn't hesitate to approach her and wrapped his arms around her waist. He leaned his head on hers, holding her tightly.
"No, it won't always be like this. One day I'll proudly show you off as my girl. This is only temporary. For now, can you just trust me? " he said then leaned over to kiss her cheek, lingering his lips there.
Above them, the dark clouds seemed to drift apart. It started to rain once more. The wind was picking up as each minute passed
"We're going to get sick, c' mon let's go inside" he suggested while softly running his fingers through her hair.
By this point, she was too jaded to even resist and allowed him to walk them back to the warmth of his place.
Even though the problem wasn't resolved, Jordan was doing everything in his power to stay by her side. Ava didn't want to make it any more difficult than she always has. She surrendered to his touch allowing it to calm her as it always did.
♡
When they returned, they left their soaked shoes outside by the door. Ava's head hung low as Jordan led her inside.
"How's about a nice hot shower after being in the rain" he suggested and she shrugged but didn't pull from him.
Jordan took them to the bathroom, sat her on the edge of the bathtub and started the water. Once the water was hot enough, he asked her to stand up and slowly stripped her.
At this point, they had already been so intimate a certain amount of times that it didn't even faze her to be nude in front of him. Jordan helped her inside, took off his own clothes and joined her.
There was nothing sexual about the situation. He lovingly washed her hair and body. When he was done, she offered to wash his hair whilst he washed his body. She blushed for a few seconds when he turned to face her, making him chuckle.
The water was turned off just in time, he got out and reached for 2 towels, giving one of them to her. Whilst she dried off, he went back into the bedroom to bring back a warm set of clothes.
♡
"Feel better sweetheart?" He asked and she nodded.
They were now in his bedroom, a loose towel hanging on hips next to the dresser and her, sitting on the bed in sweats and a long sleeved shirt.
Ava didn't feel like making matters worse. She almost felt guilty for everything that had happened tonight. Moreso, embarrassed to even look at him.
"Why do you care about me so much" she questioned while combing out her hair and he slipped into a shirt.
"Because I love you silly " he answered and smiled.
"And I'm not going to let you push me away like you always want to" he told her, ripping off the towel and putting on red basketball shorts.
"Sorry" was all she said feeling ashamed.
" Don't apologize, I know it's not easy dating me but I promise you I'm worth it " he said and shrugged trying to force out a smile.
"Of Course you are, you don't even have to tell me that "
Ava stood up from the bed and walked over to where he was. Hugging him from behind, she rested her cheek on his back. Jordan could feel her heartbeat hammering through her chest.
" You mean everything to me, I'm just scared to lose you "she murmured.
In response, he gently placed his hands on her arm. Turning himself around, he placed a soft kiss on her forehead.
" You're not the only one who's scared to lose somebody, I'm scared to lose you too"
♡
Their hair was damp and their bodies had become warm. They hoped that they wouldn't get sick from staying outside too long.
"Are you hungry?" He asked her while she was organizing her suitcase.
"No, I'm not, I'm actually gonna go to sleep. I hope that's ok" she answered and pulled out her favorite lilac colored plush throw.
"Yeah, of course, it's ok but where are you going?" He questioned gesturing to her blanket.
"To the living room," she answered.
"Why are you going to the living room?" He added.
"To sleep" she clarified.
"Why-, I thought you were going to sleep in here with me like we have been sleeping the other nights," He said gesturing to his bed.
Ava grew silent for a moment, clutching her blanket close to her chest.
"Don't feel bad but-" she paused.
"I don't think we should share a bed tonight".
"Why not?" He asked cocking an eyebrow.
"I-I don't want to get intimate" she answered intentionally paraphrasing something else.
"You don't want to make love tonight?" He said.
She looked around the room awkwardly and shook her head.
"Baby that's ok, we don't have to make love tonight, I appreciate your honesty if you want I can sleep in the living room and you can stay here," he said in a caring manner.
"No, it's your room, I would rather you stay here" she reasoned.
"Ava-" he tried to differ.
"Jordan-" she argued giving him a firm
glance.
"Okay fine, but at least let me help you fix where you sleep," he said and she nodded.
♡
"The couch is too small" Ava pointed out.
"I'll just sleep on the floor".
"You are not sleeping in the floor" Jordan said while shaking his head.
"Yes I am" she argued.
"Okay fine" he accepted.
He brought out more blankets since she was being very stubborn about sleeping on the floor. They laid out 2 thick duvets and a teal silky sheet on top. Jordan gave her a comforter to cover herself.
"I'm gonna go brush my teeth" she said and went to do just that.
♡
When she returned, Jordan had set up a few pillows. She ambled into the room, noticing that the lights were now dimmed. He took a quick glance at her, she appeared soft and glowing. He noticed the sheer top that she had changed into. It seemed as if she was covering her chest because she wasn't wearing a bra anymore. Jordan tried not to look to not make her feel uncomfortable.
Ava eyed him carefully as she got on her knees and crawled under the duvet. Jordan sat at the end of the edge of her feet.
She could tell that he longed to be there with her but knew that Jordan respected her decision to sleep alone.
"You should get some rest too, I've put you through a lot tonight" She suggested as she adjusted her body for a comfortable position to sleep in.
"Don't say that, besides, I'm not sleepy right now" he responded giving her reassuring smile.
"So what are you going to do?" She asked.
"Probably watch tv or something" he answered.
"Oh okay," she said and nodded.
Just as he was about to get up, she spoke again.
"You know you can give me a kiss goodnight if you want".
She sweetly smiled when he grinned and crawled over on his hands and knees to kiss her. Her mouth was minty and her lips were so plush soft. Jordan almost didn't want to pull away.
"Sweet dreams" he told her and kissed her cheek.
♡
Jordan watched tv with the volume low, still sitting at the edge where Ava was sound asleep. Every few minutes if so, he'd looked back at her to make sure she was ok.
He decided to call it a night and went to brush his teeth. After he was done and walked back into the living room, he noticed that Ava was shivering in her sleep. She slept a safe distance from the fireplace. Thus, Jordan decided to start one in hopes that it would provide enough warmth for her.
Her eyes fluttered open to the sight of him kneeling down beside the fireplace, closing the screen door. She watched him move around the room and somehow fell asleep again for a short while.
She woke up after about 45 minutes and noticed that he was now sitting on the couch, looking through a magazine. He was trying so he'd not to fall asleep for his head kept falling slightly forward and back.
Lifting the duvet, she waited for him to realize that she was awake. Jordan looked over as he was already doing the past 2 hours. Ava gestured for him to get under covers with her to which he seemed confused for a moment. She assumed that he didn't get the hint and turned her body back around to fall asleep but left it open.
She had made sure to scoot enough so that if he decided, he could lay next to her.
After a few minutes, the tv turned off and the sound of rustling filled the room. She was in a light state of sleep, thus she wasn't fully in a deep slumber yet.
She felt the presence of another person behind her and then a firm but gentle grasp around her waist. His body warming from hers, she hummed feeling his touch and smiled. His chin nuzzling in the crevice of her neck.
Ava felt the need to face him and lied on her back. Jordan peered down at her with warm eyes. They shifted between meeting her gaze and her inviting lips. Unable to contain himself any longer, he leaned in, closing his mouth over hers to which she responded. She trembled underneath him, still not use to his affection. Jordan deepened in, he shifted his body so that he was now hovering over her.
Ava inhaled sharply feeling something stiff against the inside of her thighs. He took a second to pull away and look at her as if he was asking for permission to continue. Ava got the hint, nodding her head. He beamed a smile and began to trail kisses on her neck. She hummed in response, giving him better access, enjoying the feeling of his full lips on her skin.
At the same time, Jordan had begun to undo the buttons of her sheer top. His kiss trailing lower and lower as each button became free. Once he managed to get them all, his hands reached to slide the material off her shoulders. The crisp cold temperature of the room caused her buds to stiffen making her hiss and him groan from delight. She waited for his next move as her bare chest heaved up and down at a steady pace.
She took matters into her own hands and rose from her back to cup his face and kissed him, warm and very soft-like. Jordan caught off guard by her sudden actions. But felt himself grow even more aroused when feeling the friction of their chests. With agile movements, he pulled away to remove his shirt and shorts. He lied her back down to peel the sweatpants off her legs and threw them behind him.
"C' mere" he murmured as he pulled her into his lap.
"What?" She said in between shaky breaths and held onto his broad shoulders.
Their fronts, now grinding against one another causing her eyes to nearly roll to the back of her head. It was almost a little too overwhelming for her, as he leaned down to take one of her buds into his mouth. In response, she leaned forward trying to hide her face into the crevice of his neck, feeling bashful.
He began to speak.
"I'm gonna-" kisses her collarbone.
"Prepare you-" kisses her other collarbone.
"And you're gonna be-" kisses her jawline.
"On top" kisses her lips.
"Okay?" He finished as he pulls away to look at her.
"On top?" She repeats as she looks at him with worry.
"Yes, baby" he murmurs lovingly as he lies her back down.
On his stomach, he lies between her parted thighs, trying to keep things as steady as he can.
Her breath hitched in her throat, body becoming tense at the idea of what he suggested.
Before she could even process what was going on, she felt her lower region being exposed, the undergarment that concealed it was being dragged down her legs.
A soft kiss was planted right in the center of her womanhood, followed by a few scattered ones. She bit her lip to stifle in any sounds, for some reason she was feeling rather shy tonight.
Taking the most sensitive part of her body into his mouth, he sucked it gently. Her hips bucked in response, causing him to suck harder. It didn't take much longer before she was a quivering mess. He had made sure to collect the intimate fluids she had released from his actions.
"I'll never get tired of that" he admitted as he planted one last kiss on her mound before crawling up to kiss her lips.
"Wait here okay?" He whispered as she nodded and he stood up to looking for something.
Within a few moments, he came back holding a silver packet in between his hands. As careful as he could, he tore the small packet and in one swift motion, removed his boxers. He groaned in relief as his manhood sprung free. Ava was too busy speculating what was to come next.
Once rolling on the condom, Jordan rejoined her on the set up of blankets in front of his fireplace. The room was dimmed but the flames encased behind the screen doors of the fireplace seemed to provide enough light for them to see.
Ava seated, with the silky bed sheet covering her naked form. Until she noticed that he was prying it off.
"You ready sweetheart?" He asked as he drew her closer to the point where she was now seated on his lap.
"Jordan-, I don't know if I can do this, can't you just d-" she rambled and he embraced her close to his chest.
"Shhh.. you'll be fine" he assured her while lovingly tucking a small piece of hair strand behind her ear.
"Raise up baby" he instructed as he looked down to his member which was almost painfully hard.
Jordan took her hand guiding it to the ache between his legs, she gasped when she felt how solid it had become. Her trembling hands were warm, pumping him for a few seconds before placing him at her entrance.
"Take deep breath honey".
She did as told, pushing him in as she tried her best to relax her muscles. She accidentally squeezed him during this attempt and he groaned in pleasure.
"Sorry" she whispered and proceeded.
She could feel every inch of him, as she carefully sunk down on his member. It was painful for the first minute. This way, she was deliciously stretched in a way she had never been stretched before.
Jordan was rather patient and waited for her to adjust to him in this position.
"Good job baby" he praised while rubbing her back as she remained still.
"You can start whenever you're ready" he added as he continued to comfort her with soothing gestures.
It finally got to a point where the slight stinging was replaced by a pleasant sensation. Involuntarily, her hips bucked against his, causing both of them to moan.
She had no clue what she was doing but continued to grind her hips. She grew timid and a little awkward again and hid her face into his neck causing him to chuckle softly.
"That's it you got it, just find your rhythm and don't be afraid to move more, I won't break " he encouraged cutely.
Trusting his words, she raised her hips higher and sunk down on him once more. A small moan escaped his lips, indicating that she must be doing something right.
When Jordan figured she found her rhythm, he began to slowly lie on his back, watching her with amorous eyes.
Her movements stilled for a moment, wondering what he was doing. In response, he planted his hands on the tops of her thighs and rubbed soothing circles on them.
"Do your thing baby, I trust you ".
Seeing that she was still a little hesitant, he reached for her hands and held them. He bucked his upwards a few times causing a loud moan to erupt from her. This seemed to embolden her and she slowly rolled her hips.
Jordan marveled her mere beauty and the way she got lost while he was lost inside of her. Her curls cascaded in waves, concealing her chest, while the fire behind her created a painting of her moving form. In his eyes, at that moment, she was art.
It was hard to keep his eyes on her since she was loving him so good, and she knew it. Ava watched his reactions to her body. Testing his limits by drawing her hips up to the point where their bodies would disconnect and then lowering herself.
Their breaths became shaky, so close to the peak of their desire. She planted her hands on his chest and rolled her body forward, causing him to release a loud moan. This emboldened her to quicken her movements, but with her peak of desire creeping close, it became to much for her and she had to slow down again.
"I can't" she whimpered as the knot forming in her lower abdomen began to tighten.
She shook her head, uncertain of how to deal with this wave of pleasure creeping close.
"Want me to take control?" He suggested and she nodded weakly.
In one swift motion, he switched the positions and lied her down. He was painfully close but he needed her to release first.
Softly and slowly easing himself inside her, he drew his hips back and rolled them forward.
He lovingly murmured words of appreciation and encouragement close to her ear, praising her.
"You did so good baby"
"God you look pretty on top of me"
"I'm proud of you"
"We gotta do that again"
"You loved me so good"
With him making love to her and whispering reassuring words in her ear, it was almost too much for her to bear. He could sense that she was close by the way her walls contracted around him.
Pulling his head back, to look into her amber eyes which were filled with so much emotion. He finished her off.
He sweetly kissed her forehead before pulling out.