Writer Games | Masquerade of Martyrs & Family Ties

Task Seven: The Flood /SF - Egan Agni [6]

If there's one thing I  know, it's that I ain't getting' out of here no more. Ma ain't here, sis  ain't here, ain't no one here to help me. Nothin's gonna help me, an' I  guess I knew that for a long while, but to be honest with ya I didn't  really wanna admit it. But I sit here now, an' I'm as cold as I've ever  been, an' I jus' wish I wasn't here, y'know? I guess lots an' lots o'  people wish they weren't where they were, but boy, I jus' can't shake my  feelin'. It's been a real nagger, naggin' me in the back of m'mind for a  while. Them black waves, they're cold but there ain't nothing there. My  hands reach out t'grab some of it, but it's freezin' so I jus' stare at  it.

The sky ain't much  better either, all dark and moody. Pa usedta say that there ain't  nothing better than the moment right after a good rain, but it's been  rainin' a long while, an' it ain't stoppin', so I guess that doesn't  really work here.

My hands an' body are  shiverin', m'teeth chatterin' all loud an' all. I can't help it, really.  If ma was here, she'd prob'ly tell me I'd better get a jacket on, but  y'see, I don't have no jacket no more, an' I haven't seen no one around  to ask for one. Ma always said ya gotta ask for things, 'cause otherwise  you don't get nothin' done. My eyes close, an' I gotta say it's real  relaxin' an' I barely think of the cold. Maybe if I jus' sleep off the  rain, it'll go away. All this survivin', I jus' wanna go home, be right  warm.

Behind m'eyelids, I can  see ma home. It's lookin' real nice, y'know? Fresh paint, clean windows.  Like when pa was around. He used'ta be the one who always cleaned  around. Couldn't stand no dirt or soot or nothin' like that in the  house. Said he got enough of that coal at work-didn't want to bring that  home with 'im too. I know pa's gone. I've 'eard the stories, even  though ma didn't tell me or Aithne nothin' much about the day. I 'member  the Big Crash an' all, not like that big ol' explosion a while back way  back. An' he didn't come home no more. Ma was real sad, always cryin'  away for a while until we needed her help. She was good like that,  though. Still, this house looks mighty nice, like before the Big Crash,  an' then right beside it is ol' Mrs. Wicket's house. It looks mighty  nice today, nicer than last time I saw it. Now, it's jus' all old an'  rotten. Mrs. Wicket can't do much no more, but here it looks mighty  clean.

I can feel the dirt an'  all under my feet. I'm barefoot, but I'm used'ta it. I'm right excited  to see my fam'ly again, even though somewhere in m'mind I think I should  be somewhere else. But there ain't nothing stopping me now, an' the  'hood's all quiet-like, as though we was playin' a game of Peacekeeper's  Catch. I peek into the window, but I gotta stand on m'tippy-toes  t'reach the ledge. I feel mighty smaller than normal, but I mean I'm  home so I've always been mighty small an' all. But it's mighty strange  though 'cause inside I don't see nothin'. An' I don't mean I don't see  no people, 'cause I see m'fam'ly an' all but there ain't nothin' on the  ground. There ain't pa's favourite armchair or ma's ol' sewin' machine  or my rug or nothin'. There's only them standin' there, back t'me. Lil'  Aithne an' grandpoppy an' grandmamma an' ma lookin' pretty an' pa  lookin' proud. I mean, I can't see them lookin' proud or pretty, but I  can tell. I'm good like that.

I nearly trip over ma  own feet as I race inside, the door slammin' as I run in an' they turn  around as I run inta the livin' room. They al look so mighty happy,  right pretty and fresh an' I realize how much I missed lil' Aithne an'  my fam'ly. I can feel them how tears runnin' down m'face 'cause they  drip right down to m'neck, but I realize how much I love them even  though I ain't much of a good kid normally. I ain't a hugger usually,  'xcept for ma, 'cause she's always right sweet an' knows how t'make me  feel better, but I went right over an' they all hugged me an' I felt  warm an' safe an' happy. They didn't say nothin', only ma smiled right  down at me an' pa gave my hair a ruffle an' Aithne grabbed onto m'leg  an' grandmamma an' grandpoppy just hugged each other.

It was mighty nice, an' I  barely thought of anythin' 'xcept them. I wasn't hungry or cold or sad  or nothin' no more, only happy an' warm an' safe. Outta the corner o' my  eye I saw somethin' on the plain ol' carpet, so I pushed away an'  reached down t' grab it. It was a marble, my marble: the one I won time  back way back when I beat that ol' kid who now I couldn't even remember  the name of. It was yellow inside but it was swirlin' around an' around.  I was right mesmerized by it, so I turned around to show m'family but  alluva sudden I couldn't remember nobody. I saw the faces but I didn't  know who they were. They looked familiar but as I searched an' searched I  couldn't think of no one an' I didn't know the lil' girl's name or the  older people's names an' for a moment I couldn't even remember my own  name, to tell ya the truth. But the marble kept swirlin' an' swirling  an' I couldn't let go as it grew colder an' colder and stuck t'my hand.

It was still in m'hand  when I felt the waves brush over me. I was cold, so cold. The marble  nestled right in m'hand, right tightly, 'cause I wasn't gonna let it go.  It felt like I was on fire, frozen, freezin', an' as I stared to the  sky I could hear them faint voices of some people way in the distance,  an' I wanted to go with them.