okay so idk about you guys but i'm the oldest sibling out of 4 kids. my siblings are okay ((for the most part sometimes i want to slap them tho)) but it's mainly my parents that bother me
being the oldest sucks bc of my parents
like sometimes it's cool bc i get first dibs on things sometimes and i get to go out with my friends ((on the rare occasions i'm invited places)) but most of the time it just plain sucks
like my parents expect me to be this "perfect role model" for my younger siblings
AND I CAN'T FUCKING BE A PERFECT ROLE MODEL AND THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND THAT
LIKE THEY WANT ME TO GET PERFECT GRADES AND BE ATHLETIC AND BE TALENTED AND BE SOCIAL AND BE IN CLUBS AND BE POLITE
AND I JUST CAN'T
they'll be like "you're grounded bc you have a b in your ap class." "why do you spend all your time on the internet that's stupid." "the bands you like suck you should just stop liking them and give up on meeting them." "why don't you talk to people just fucking get rid of your social anxiety." "you can't give a presentation without wanting to grow? well get over it."
AND MORE AND I'VE FUCKING TIRED OF IT
the other day i was at a talent show at my old school and some of my old friends were there and my mom told me to talk to them but i didn't and when we got home my mom was all like
"YOU'RE PATHETIC WHY DON'T YOU TALK TO PEOPLE I'M DONE WITH YOUR INSECURITIES AND YOUR ANXIETY IT'S JUST PATHETIC. YOU NEED TO SHOW YOUR SIBLINGS THAT BEING SOCIAL IS GOOD."
and i get fucking blamed every time my siblings fail at something. like my sister doesn't make a goal in soccer and my dad is like "well it's bc you haven't played soccer in a year so she's not going to do good bc you're not there to show her." and i'm like "no it's bc she fucking just missed the goal."
and i just can't fucking stand it
